Last year we compiled the Top 15 Bathroom Fight Scenes, so since we’ve now had time to fully digest, it feels only right to take a visit to that other room where the magic happens – the kitchen. Some might say a visit to the bathroom should come after the kitchen, but hey, at COF we don’t split hairs (or bills). The kitchen feels like the neglected cousin of the bathroom when it comes to being utilised as a space for cinematic action, therefore we felt obliged to serve (pardon the pun) up a feature highlighting the amount of bodily harm that can be inflicted in a food preparation area.
So, if you feel like the art of cooking has been sanitised by the countless number of channels we have dedicated to it, it’s time for us to take a look at what happens when the main ingredients are anger, revenge, and a desire to kill. There’s a few techniques that we’re looking out for when it comes to kitchen fight scenes, and it’s safe to say that number one is the use of the utensils. You have a variety of sharp knives, pots & pans, and red hot stoves, so use what’s at your disposal! Number two is, just like a bathroom fight scene, how is the space used? Kitchens are cluttered places, whether it be a homely household or a sleek spacious restaurant, the environment lends itself to frantic exchanges, so as an action director there’s plenty to work with!
We’ll be plating up our culinary chaos in the order of how much time is spent in the kitchen area, and just like any creative chef, you’ll see that we’ve sprinkled in a couple of liberties here and there. If you feel like any recipes have been missed, feel free to add them in the comments section! So, without further ado, your COF degustation begins with a dish from Indonesia –
The Raid 2 (2014) – Iko Uwais vs. Cecep Arif Rahman
Total Cookery Time: 6:50
By the time we get to the kitchen showdown in The Raid 2 there’s already been so much high quality action on display, it’s hard to image anything could top it. Coming straight off of Uwais dealing with the iconic Hammer Girl and Baseball Bat Boy, his kitchen clearing stand-off with the (so far) quietly lurking series newcomer Cecep Arif Rahman is one which not only belongs on this list, but any list of top tier fight scenes. A one on one epic clocking in at close to 7 minutes, it’s understandable why director Gareth Evans decided to wrap up the series on such a high note.
Chocolate (2008) – Jija Yanin vs thugs
Total Cookery Time: 4:44
The movie that introduced us to the talents of Jija Yanin, one of the late Panna Rittikrai’s final protégés, Chocolate is a masterclass in steadily escalating fight scenes. This particular one takes place mid-film, as Yanin’s autistic character Zen makes a midnight excursion to a meat factory, to demand the money owed to her ailing mother from a less than sympathetic supervisor. When it becomes clear no money is going to change hands without a fight, that’s exactly what goes down, as Yanin single handedly takes on a small army of meat clever wielding butchers.
https://youtu.be/qPEEfP_fkzM?t=2909
One Million K(l)icks (2014) – Mike Möller vs. Li Yan-Long
Total Cookery Time: 4:23
In 2014 German martial arts wunderkind and stuntman Mike Möller was given his chance to shine by headlining the fight flick One Million K(l)icks. When Möller’s headstrong character finds fame online through clips of him fighting various opponents, he eventually meets his match in the kitchen of a Chinese restaurant, run by South Shaolin Master actor Li Yan-Long. In a battle of new school versus old school, the fight brings the kung-fu movie tradition of a softer style being able to neutralise an aggressive one into a contemporary setting, and does so with satisfying results.
https://youtu.be/zFxKICDR8L4?t=2387
The Bodyguard from Beijing (1994) – Jet Li vs. Collin Chou
Total Cookery Time – 3:28
After a slew of period pieces, Jet Li returned to modern day action with 1994’s The Bodyguard from Beijing. Teamed up with frequent collaborator Corey Yuen Kwai, the finale pits Li against Collin Chou in an era when both were at the top of their game. Making excellent use of a kitchen that’s part of an open floor plan apartment, the added danger of a leaking gas canister brings a unique element to the fight, as both attempt to take out the other without falling unconscious from the toxic fumes. Li and Chou would face off more than once during the 90’s, but this is my favorite of their encounters.
Sleepless Night (2011) – Tomer Sisley vs. Julien Boisselier
Total Cookery Time: 2:59
Thoongaavanam (2015) – Kamal Haasan vs. Kishore Kumar G.
Total Cookery Time: 2:25
Sleepless (2016) – Jamies Foxx vs. Tim Connolly
Total Cookery Time: 1:47
Our first three-course meal in one sitting, director Frédéric Jardin’s 2011 hit Sleepless Night spawned a Bollywood and a Hollywood re-make, with both providing their own takes on the intense kitchen fight scene the original is known for. In it comic turned actor Tomer Sisley goes up against Julien Boisselier, with the formers Jiujitsu and Krav Maga training delivering a brutal edge (not to mention a ferocious elevator fight that the kitchen fight segues from – but we’ll save that part for another list!). Kamal Hassan’s clumsy running and Jamie Foxx’s Tupperware friendly reinterpretations pale in comparison.
Check out a medley of all 3 movies via the link – https://youtu.be/fv2g4gIog9M?t=1
The Kick (2010) – Ye Ji-won & Petchtai Wongkamlao vs thugs
Total Cookery Time: 2:40
The 2nd movie on the list to feature Jija Yanin, unfortunately this time she’s not a part of the scene in question. In 2010 Prachya Pinkaew (the director of Ong Bak and Tom Yum Goong), somehow convinced the Koreans to make this misguided Thai co-production, about a Korean family that move to Thailand and get embroiled in a (you guessed it) stolen artefact. In this scene Ye Ji-won and Petchai Wongkamlao (the comic relief guy from the previously mentioned Tony Jaa flicks) have to fight off a group of thugs, while thankfully being in the vicinity of a kitchen.
https://youtu.be/E0vi962JN_M?t=2m29s
Special ID (2013) – Donnie Yen vs. thugs
Total Cookery Time – 2:26
I’m pretty sure I made my feelings for Special ID clear in the review I wrote at the time of its release, but one thing that can’t be denied, is that Donnie Yen’s skirmish through the corridors of a restaurants kitchen while fighting off multiple assailants is an entertaining one. Featuring plenty of painful impacts, falls, and Yen’s trademark flailing fists, as a fight scene it ticks all of the boxes, with the cluttered environment leading to a number of wince inducing close quarter exchanges. If only the rest of the movie was as good as this scene.
The Man from Hong Kong (1976) – Jimmy Wang Yu vs. Grant Page
Total Cookery Time: 2:22
A Hong Kong/Australia co-production, in the 2008 documentary Not Quite Hollywood: The Wild, Untold Story of Ozploitaiton, many of the cast and crew recalled how much of a nightmare it was to work with Jimmy Wang Yu. A nightmare he may have been, but we still got this epic kitchen fight in which he squares off against legendary Aussie stuntman Grant Page (whose trousers split barely seconds into the fight, revealing some colourful yellow underwear). If you’re not distracted by the wardrobe malfunction, look out for the vintage Kelloggs Cornflakes boxes that line the shelves!
The Private Eyes (1976) – Michael Hui vs. Cham Kim-Wan
Total Cookery Time: 2:04
Some consider The Private Eyes to be the best of the Hui Brothers collaborations, and it’s not hard to see why. Michael Hui’s kitchen duel with Cham Kim-Wan is pure comedic genius, as the pair face off using everything from strainers, sharks, chickens, and most hilariously, a pair of makeshift nunchucks made from a string of sausages. Now, imagine Michael as the lead in Dragon from Russia instead of his brother Sam, that would have been a movie!
Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (1995) – Steven Seagal vs. Everett McGill
Total Cookery Time – 1:37
It may have been 1992’s Under Siege which gave us Casey Ryback, but we’d have to wait for its (endlessly more entertaining) sequel to see him in a real kitchen fight. We may never see the combination of Steven Seagal, Katherine Heigl, and China being attacked by crazy Americans in a movie again, but at least it happened. Here, after Seagal and Everett McGill go at each other through several train carriages, they eventually fall down a staircase landing in the kitchen, where Seagal decides it’s time to really get down to business. Watch out for the cheesy one-liner at the end.
Out for Justice (1991) – Steven Seagal vs. William Forsythe
Total Cookery Time – 1:14
It seems that in the kitchen, you can’t escape Steven Seagal! I admit my pet hate in screen fights is when they’re too one-sided in the heroes favour, however with that being said, there’s something undeniably joyous in watching Seagal decimate his opponents throughout his early movies. Here it’s William Forysthe, who made the mistake of murdering Bobby Lupo, and the even bigger mistake of ending up in a kitchen with Seagal. Cue being on the receiving end of frying pans, rolling pins, and anything else within arms reach. I’m not too sure the ‘vs.’ is even earned in this scene, but damn it’s fun to watch.
Upgrade (2018) – Logan Marshall-Green vs. Richard Cawthorne
Total Cookery Time – 00:56
Probably the most criminally underseen movie of 2018. Fantastic fight scenes? Check. A unique sci-fi concept? Check. Hard R-rated violence? Check. If you haven’t seen it, go check it out, and if you need any further reason to, well this kitchen fight scene should give you all the incentive you need. After Logan Marshall-Green is paralysed in a car crash and his wife murdered, he’s offered a chance at redemption when an experimental computer chip called Stem is linked up to his brain, allowing him to be upwardly mobile once more. For those involved in his wife’s murder, that spells bad news.
The Expendables 2 (2012) – Jet Li vs. thugs
Total Cookery Time – 00:41
Jet Li may have spent most of his time in The Expendables franchise being the brunt of height related jokes, but at least he got to unleash for a few seconds (literally, seconds) in the horrendous sequel. Showing off his skills in the opening action sequence set in Nepal, apart from being pretty much the only scene Li would feature in for the whole movie, it’s also the highlight of the bloated, overly self-aware 2nd instalment. As brief as the sequence may be, Li’s energetic burst of action is a memorable one, as he unleashes against wave after wave of blood thirsty opponents.
Bonus dish –
Tom Yum Goong (2005) – Tony Jaa vs. Johnny Tri Nguyen
Total Cookery Time – 2:11
Ok so technically this fight doesn’t actually take place in a kitchen, but rather right outside one, with the chefs looking on inside as much a part of the audience as we are. Still, we thought it was worthy of inclusion. After decimating a small army of attackers via an amazing one-shot stairwell fight, in his sophomore starring role Tony Jaa takes on a pre-The Rebel Johnny Tri Nguyen, a pairing which pits Muay Boran against Wushu. With the threat of his beloved elephant becoming the latest item on the menu, Jaa unleashes his inner rage at a time when elbows to the head still felt like a breath of fresh air.
Again, if you feel like any recipes have been missed, feel free to add them in the comments section below. Also, if you want to see what’s going on in the bathroom, don’t miss COF’s Top 15 Bathroom Fight Scenes.
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