Giant Robot Action Pack: Crash and Burn/Robot Wars DVD (Shout!)

Giant Robot Action Pack: Crash and Burn/Robot Wars DVD (Shout!)

Giant Robot Action Pack: Crash and Burn/Robot Wars DVD (Shout!)

RELEASE DATE: June 14, 2011

Are Michael Bay’s Transformer movies too flashy (or lame) for you? Sick of CG? Yet, you still want some old school, giant robot goodness? Shout! Factory has the perfect double feature for you: Crash and Burn (1990) and Robot Wars (1993). Also provided a link for Robot Jox (1990) if you’re really serious!

Trailers: Crash and Burn | Robot Wars | Robot Jox

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Action-Packed Double Feature: Gordon’s War/Off Limits DVD (Shout!)

Action-Packed Double Feature: Gordon's War/Off Limits DVD (Shout!)

Action-Packed Double Feature: Gordon's War/Off Limits DVD (Shout!)

RELEASE DATE: June 14, 2011

Shout! Factory is at it again with another set of exploitational madness. Gordon’s War: Gordon (Paul Winfield, The Terminator) spent four years in Vietnam as a Green Beret fighting someone else’s battle… now he’s come back home to fight his own. Also starring Carl Lee (Superfly), Tony King (Bucktown) and singer Grace Jones (A View To A Kill). Directed by Ossie Davis (Cotton Comes To Harlem).

You also get Off Limits: Being a cop is tough. But in war-torn Saigon in 1968, being a cop is crazy. Someone is brutally murdering Vietnamese prostitutes with children by American fathers, and plainclothes military cops Sgt. Buck McGriff (Willem Dafoe, Platoon) and Sgt. Albaby Perkins (Gregory Hines, The Cotton Club) are put on the case that no one wants solved.

Trailers: Gordon’s War (must see!) | Off Limits

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Tactical Force Blu-ray/DVD (Vivendi)

Tactical Force Blu-ray/DVD (Vivendi)

Tactical Force Blu-ray/DVD (Vivendi)

RELEASE DATE: August 9, 2011

A training exercise for the LAPD SWAT Team goes terribly wrong when they find themselves pitted against two rival gangs while trapped in an abandoned Hangar, armed with nothing but blanks. Starring Steve Austin and Michael Jai White. Whether this movie ends up sucking or not, at least Black Dynamite is in it!

Read our review for Tactical Force here.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Steven Seagal Action DVD Set: Hard To Kill/Out For Justice/On Deadly Ground/Exit Wounds (Warner)

Steven Seagal Action DVD Set: Hard To Kill/Out For Justice/On Deadly Ground/Exit Wounds (Warner)

Steven Seagal Action DVD Set: Hard To Kill/Out For Justice/On Deadly Ground/Exit Wounds (Warner)

RELEASE DATE: August 2, 2011

Say what you want about Steven Seagal today, but back in the 90’s, he was a bad muthaf**ka! Hard To Kill (1990), Out For Justice (1991 – his best movie!), On Deadly Ground (1994) and a rare two-word titled movie called Exit Wounds (2001).

Trailers: Hard To Kill | Out For Justice | On Deadly Ground | Exit Wounds

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Martial Arts Titles |

Quentin Tarantino: The Disciple of Hong Kong documentary

Quentin Tarantino: The Disciple of Hong Kong

Quentin Tarantino: The Disciple of Hong Kong

A new documentary about Quentin Tarantino and his Hong Kong influences will air on French TV in a couple of weeks. The documentary features interviews with Ringo Lam, Gordon Liu, Simon Yam and Mike Leeder. If you don’t have French TV and worried you’ll never see it, I’m sure it’ll end up on youtube. – Thanks to David Rees for the heads up.

For more information and a trailer, click here.

Posted in News |

Disciples of the 36th Chamber | aka Disciples of the Master Killer (1985) Review

"Disciples of the 36th Chamber" Chinese Theatrical Poster

"Disciples of the 36th Chamber" Chinese Theatrical Poster

AKA: Master Killer 3
Director: Lau Kar Leung
Producer: Mona Fong Yat Wah
Cast: Hsiao Ho, Gordon Liu Chia Hui, Lily Li Li Li, Jason Pai Piao, Lau Kar Leung, Lee Hoi San, Yeung Sai Gwan, Shum Lo, Lau Siu Kwan, Yeung Chi Hing
Running Time: 89 min.

By JJ Hatfield

“Disciples Of The 36th Chamber” is one of the all time best films of the genre! This was essentially the last of the fantastic films to come from director Chia-Liang Liu and the amazing cast for the Shaw Brothers. Everyone wanted this to be a very special movie and they succeeded beyond all wildest expectations! I have never seen a film open with such a terrific piece of martial arts (I refer to the red or black screen used in earlier films to show case the actor’s talents).

The magic begins with a great fight performance and that means the superb Fong Sai Yuk (Hsiao Ho) performing dazzling acrobatic martial arts with that brilliant style all his own. From the very beginning to the last final moments of the film you will be mesmerized. It’s not constant death match fighting but hardly a moment passes when nothing is happening. The viewer is swept up into the remarkable story until the wildly entertaining massive action finish!

There have been more than a handful of actors who have played the character Fong Sai Yuk in old school fighting films over the years. All the actors played the young man in different stories but the character is always portrayed as being arrogant, highly skilled but not always thinking before taking action.

This film is also sometimes referred to as the 3rd and last of the so called “Chamber” of movies; 36th Chapter of Shaolin; Return to the 36th Camber and then, Disciples Of The 36th Chamber.

Although not directly related the first chamber film starring Chia Hui Liu is fantastic as an introduction to some very interesting chambers, many deceptively difficult. Then with Return To The 36th Chamber came something very different. It is supposed to be very funny but the pretense did not make me laugh. But all is forgiven after watching this film.

Lily Li is terrific as Sai Yuk’s mother. She is truly amazing as an actress and martial artist highly active in the industry for decades. I have deep respect for this lady. She helped considerably in the effort to have women treated more fairly in the movies.

From early childhood mother taught son the martial arts. He had a natural affinity but she trained him hard and he loved it. Nothing made him happier than to show off his astounding skills. His fight history on the circuit was well known far and wide. He goes on to be a champion and his numerous matches are always in his favor. When he kills one of his opponents his life is in jeopardy from those wanting revenge. His mother takes him with her to another town and marries a man named Fong who owns a local kung fu school. She has two sons with Fong who try to keep their brother out of trouble but it’s an extremely difficult struggle. Fong Sai Yuk doesn’t want to go to school preferring to be outside or practicing kung fu. He is incorrigible, stubborn, rash and rebellious but not a bad young man.

In a misunderstanding with a monk he ends up in trouble with the local Manchu gym and the order is given to have him be-headed and the Fong school shut down. In desperation his mother begs for help and sanctuary for her three sons as secular pupils at the Shaolin Temple. San Te (Chia Hui Liu) considers the subject and the mother reminds him that they and their school style are related. She is so sincere, pleading so desperately San Te and the Abbott agree to take in her sons as she announces she will deal with any consequences from the local Manchu rulers. Everyone objects because of the risk but she has made up her mind. It’s the only way she can keep them safe in the monastery.

Can San Te teach the young Sai Yuk how to control his emotions, channel his energy and avoid trouble?It isn’t going to be easy that’s for sure. The monk keeps him moving all day yet he still has energy to spare. The friction between the disciple and Master add an interesting edge to the situation.

Chia-Liang Liu not only directs this true masterpiece he also plays an evil Manchu leader, and his men serve as guards to the Manchu Governor, played by Jason Pai. The settings are lush, wonderfully colorful, filling the screen with a very realistic feel. At no time are you staring at minimalist cramped sets. This is sumptuous luxury and it is wonderful. The choreography is magnificent! Hsiao Ho is not just a fighter he knows what looks great and what doesn’t. Is there anything he could not do? It’s a pure joy to watch!

Chia Hui Liu has never looked better. He plays San Te with a lot of experience with the character and seems very comfortable in his role. His fighting skills have never looked better as well. He pulls out all the stops for a tremendous performance! And of course Chia-Liang Lui is great. And as usual he adds some humor in the mix but it works well, better than most any of his other films.

Whenever a possibility for Sai Yuk to rebel emerges he takes it. But no matter how smart he is or physically capable he does not have enough life experience to out smart San Te. San Te does not hesitate to teach him a lesson when he gets too cocky, insulting the ones who do not have skills yet and are just learning. San Te easily defeats the wild young man in any confrontation. There is one particular scene between the monk and his student that is pure magnificence! Sai Yuk isn’t bothering to practice “bench fighting” and San Te calls him out. What follows is the most incredible bench fight I have ever seen in a movie! Other movies have included bench fighting but it was essentially just swinging them around. This is an exercise in using locks and traps to fight with benches. You can see the concentration especially in San Te. Outstanding and beautiful!

One aspect of this movie is something lacking in most student – teacher films. Respect. The student – teacher connection goes both ways. The students want to do well but they are also fascinated by Sai Yuk’s amazing abilities. But there is a sense of respect from San Te when he is disciplining his students and even with the hot tempered Sai Yuk. It really added an element of emotion you don’t see very often if ever. By doing so it further invests the viewer in the story.

Sai Yuk is tricked into believing Manchus might consider Shaolin a friend one day. His naïveté is taken advantage of to the detriment of his Shaolin brothers. When things start to go wrong Sai Yuk is the last one to accept that he had been deceived. But when he finally does he takes all responsibility and tells San Te he got his brothers in this and he is the one who should get them out. What follows is one of the most spectacular finale’ ever! The last thirty or so minutes build up into a huge clash with the Manchus. If you need a definition for action you have found it. Students, teachers, Manchus, Manchu guards for the governor converge in a masterpiece of spectacular extravaganza. Huge numbers of bodies fighting, jumping, diving, leaping, tumbling around a rather large and extensive set. San Te is beyond excellent with his three piece staff! Very cool.

Although this is an ensemble film this is really Hsiao Ho’s opportunity to show his skills. He out-shines everyone else in the spectacular breathtaking spectacle that fills the screen with absolutely incredible feats and all at the same time. If you look anywhere in the background you see fighting, kicks, punches, Sai Yuk doing amazing acrobatic marvels, bodies flying, running around on walls and rooftops, San Te taking out Manchus with his staff-whip. The action is so intense the viewer will find they react to the images!

Choreography was ingeniously planned, practiced and performed! Very tight shots were spot on showing all of the action. And it’s not all open hand fighting. There are extensive scenes of various weapons being used by both sides. “Disciples Of The 36th Chamber” has an original, dazzling, creative, explosive finale’! It is only fitting that such a magnificent film be the last film for director, crew and the assembled cast. History will judge Chia-Liang Liu as one of the best directors of the time.

It is really necessary to watch this film more than once. With so much action it’s easy to miss a part here or there when someone has to make a choice, with the results having a great effect on others. To his credit Sai Yuk has always taken complete responsibility for any and all of his actions. And even a few that were not his fault. He may be rebellious at times but even at a young age he refuses to let anyone accept or share in his punishment, even though his two brothers are always volunteering themselves instead.

If the time had to come to an end for the most talented cast, this film is an excellent way to say goodbye to the viewers.

Highly Recommended.

JJ Hatfield’s Rating: 9.5/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , |

Godfather Squad/Bruce’s Last Battle DVD (Navarre)

Godfather Squad/Bruce's Last Battle DVD (Navarre)

Godfather Squad/Bruce's Last Battle DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: August 23, 2011

Navarre presents a kung fu cinema double feature! Ng See Yuen’s (director of “Tower of Death”) 1974 film “Godfather Squad” (aka Little Godfather) starring Bruce Leung Siu Lung and Yasuaki Kurata; as well as “Bruce’s Last Battle” — Shelved for years by 21st Century Distribution, madman Tom Ward has finally let it loose to make its home video debut!

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Martial Arts Titles |

Blade/Ring of Death aka Detective Belli DVD (Navarre)

Blade/Ring of Death DVD (Navarre)

Blade/Ring of Death DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: August 23, 2011

Navarre presents an exploitation cinema double feature! “Blade” stars John Marley (“The Godfather”) about a homicide detective goes after a woman-hating serial killer, who uses knives to murder his victims. Also included is Italian film “Ring of Death” (aka “Detective Belli”) starring Franco Nero (“Django”, “Enter the Ninja”) as a hard-boiled detective who does whatever it takes to solve a murder case.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

The Big Lebowski: Limited Edition Digibook Blu-ray (Universal)

The Big Lebowski: Limited Edition Digibook Blu-ray (Universal Studios)

The Big Lebowski: Limited Edition Digibook Blu-ray (Universal Studios)

RELEASE DATE: August 16, 2011

The Big Lebowski is a 1998 comedy film written and directed by Joel and Ethan Coen. Jeff Bridges stars as Jeff Lebowski, an unemployed Los Angeles slacker and avid bowler, who is referred to (and also refers to himself) as “The Dude”. After a case of mistaken identity, The Dude is introduced to a millionaire also named Jeffrey Lebowski. When the millionaire Lebowski’s trophy wife is later kidnapped, he commissions The Dude to deliver the ransom to secure her release. The plan goes awry when The Dude’s friend Walter Sobchak (John Goodman) schemes to keep the full ransom.

Check out the trailer here.

The Big Lebowski: Limited Edition Digibook Blu-ray (Universal Studios)

The Big Lebowski: Limited Edition Digibook Blu-ray (Universal Studios)

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Troll Hunter aka Trollhunter/Trolljegeren Blu-ray/DVD (Magnolia)

Troll Hunter aka Trollhunter/Trolljegeren Blu-ray/DVD (Magnolia)

Troll Hunter aka Trollhunter/Trolljegeren Blu-ray/DVD (Magnolia)

RELEASE DATE: August 23, 2011

The Troll Hunter is a 2010 Norwegian horror-thriller film, made in the form of a mockumentary. It is written and directed by André Øvredal, and features a mixed cast of relatively unknown actors and well-known Norwegian comedians, including Otto Jespersen. The Troll Hunter received positive reviews from Norwegian critics.

Check out the trailer here.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

The Stunt Man Blu-ray (Severin Films)

The Stunt Man Blu-ray (Severin Films)

The Stunt Man Blu-ray (Severin Films)

RELEASE DATE: June 7, 2011

The Stunt Man is a 1980 film directed by Richard Rush, starring Peter O’Toole, Steve Railsback, and Barbara Hershey. It tells the story of a young fugitive who hides as a stunt double on the set of an anti-war movie whose charismatic director will do seemingly anything for the sake of his art. Influential critic Pauline Kael considered it “a virtuoso piece of kinetic moviemaking” and rated it one of year’s best films. Some believe this movie inspired Ho Chung Tao (aka Bruce Li) to call his own movie The Chinese Stunt Man.

Check out the trailer here.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

The Godfather Part I/Part II Blu-ray (Paramount)

The Godfather Part I/Part II Blu-ray (Paramount)

The Godfather Part I/Part II Blu-ray (Paramount)

RELEASE DATE: August 2, 2011

Contains both The Godfather (1972) and it’s sequel (1974). The Godfather story chronicles the fictional Italian American Corleone crime family. Directed by Francis Ford Coppola, and starring Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, James Caan, Richard S. Castellano, Robert Duvall, Sterling Hayden, John Marley, Richard Conte, Diane Keaton, John Cazale, Talia Shire, Al Martino, Abe Vigoda and many more.

Trailers: Part I | Part II | Part III

This new Blu-ray may be the perfect set for those who want to forget Part III ever existed. Also listed are other Blu-ray/DVD editions:

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Return to the 36th Chamber | aka Return of the Master Killer (1980) Review

"Return to the 36th Chamber" Chinese Theatrical Poster

"Return to the 36th Chamber" Chinese Theatrical Poster

AKA: Master Killer 2
Director: Lau Kar Leung
Writer: Ni Kuang
Producer: Run Run Shaw
Cast: Gordon Liu Chia Hui, Johnny Wang Lung Wei, Hsiao Ho, Kong Do, Kwan Yung Moon, Ching Chu, Kara Hui Ying Hung, Bruce Lai, Yeung Jing Jing, Wong Ching Ho
Running Time: 99 min.

By JJ Hatfield

After the astounding success of The 36th Chamber of Shaolin there were two sequels planned by the Shaw Studios. The third and final film in the series is Disciples Of The 36th Chamber. Naturally the same characters, writers, crew and most actors were on board.

Liu Chia-Liang was not known to be fond of such practices as movie sequels, as in exactly the same. It was apparently encouraged to spice things up. Unfortunately for the viewer he went for one of his famous aspects as a director – humor. Most of the time his humor is tolerable or works well enough with the action. With this movie I kept wondering if it was a spoof, and unintended spoof or if it was just bad.

In most old school movies there is sufficient action or drama to allow for some goofy gags. I was prepared and I wanted to see more of San Te as the young monk. You don’t get it. I was quite disappointed when I first saw this as I was expecting a sequel and was very excited for some memorable new action/story.

It didn’t seem as though Liu Chia-Liang was putting much into it and just wanted it done.

In a fairly prosperous village, the primary source of commerce is the local dye factory that turns out high quality dyed material. One day the peace and quiet is shattered when evil Manchus storm in and set up a rival factory. Before long, acts of sabotage and violence are visited upon the locals. They decide to stand up and demand their rights. Understandable and infuriating but they all end up defeated and wounded. In desperation they ask one of the local con men to help them. He agrees and decides that he will impersonate a Shaolin Monk–in particular, San Te.

Why the hell would any culture find this amusing? Take an established likable character (San Te) and play switch. ha ha ha. I get it – I just don’t think it’s comedy.

There are numerous ways the script could have easily had Gordon Liu being San Te. Maybe Liu Chia-Liang was trying too hard to make it different, or maybe he just lost interest. There is definitely a “dead end” feeling times to the movie.

When the con man sees the villagers are even worse off after his scam, he seeks out Shaolin so he can learn to fight and return and help his friends get rid of the bastard Manchus. The con man is told he cannot be a regular Shaolin disciple, and if he wishes to stay they have some work for him to do. He is required to build a new structure for the Shaolin monastery. The con man is not happy with the arrangement, but he is determined to learn something to return to the village and help the ones he let down. So while he is building for the monks he is also watching everything they do.

The training is different than I have seen before, a method he calls “scaffolding kung fu” or “construction kung fu”. It is interesting to watch but drags on too long. By the time the building is done, the former cheat has been transformed to calm and rational action when called for in a situation. The villagers are not impressed, but soon he is taking on all the bad guys.

Don’t want to say much. Some fans rave about this being a great film. I was hoping for action and people looking good doing it while in a very peaceful monastery

I really thought this was going to be very cool and it’s just not. The “funny” characters’ funny prosthetics just weren’t funny. There is some sort of smoldering feeling, almost like bitterness sometimes, but there were enormous changes going on in the industry and some of that comes through the movie. I understood what Liu Chia-Liang was going, for but he totally wasted Kara Hui and Hsiao Ho. What a disappointment.

My complaints are somewhat minor but they did lower the rating. There was something missing and more than a couple of unresolved issues but in the context of the movie I suppose it doesn’t matter.

JJ Hatfield’s Rating: 5.5/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , |

36th Chamber of Shaolin | aka Master Killer (1978) Review

"36th Chamber of Shaolin" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“36th Chamber of Shaolin” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Lau Kar-Leung
Writer: Ni Kuang
Cast: Gordon Liu, Lo Lieh, Lau Kar Wing, Wilson Tong, Wong Yu, Lee Hoi San, Henry Yu, Hon Gwok Choi, Wai Wang, Austin Wai, Aai Dung Gwa, Billy Chan, Peter Chan, Chan Shen, Chan Si Gaai, Cheung Chok Chow
Running Time: 115 min.

By JJ Hatfield

This film is far more than just another Shaolin monk tale. Several things combined to propel this movie into a much loved, oft quoted and frequently ripmaked film. The movie is also known as the Master Killer and Shaolin Master Killer for western audiences. I suppose the marketing geniuses thought the titles needed “killing” to be more lucrative. The translations do a disservice to the cast, crew and the story as it is not a vicious, savage, kill’em all movie.

Many people consider this a turning point for the director Chia-Liang Liu/Lau Kar-Leung as well as the star, Chia Hui Liu/Gordon Liu. “The 36th Chamber of Shaolin” was a breakthrough for the genre as well.

Martial arts movies at the time showed waning interest and both the director and the star could have used a boost to their respective careers. A different sort of film was called for and Kuang Ni did an excellent job with a seemingly simple tale of revenge, train, kick ass. It could have turned into a mediocre affair but Kuang Ni added a touch of humanity that sometimes was lacking in many old school kung fu films.

Chia-Liang Lui has always been known for his intense interest in making films rooted in Chinese history. There are more than a few stories about the revered Shaolin monk, San Te. However it is important to note this movie is not based on literal history, it is a work of fiction.

Kuang Ni is the writer and a very prolific one credited with over two hundred films including Eight Diagram Pole Fighter with Chia-Liang Liu (1984) , Feng Hou (1981), All Men Are Brothers – Guanzhong Luo wrote the novel, Kuang Ni is listed in several places as the sole writer but Chang Cheh is listed by some sources as co – writer. Considering the director of this film he no doubt added his own input.

The film is generally considered by the martial arts world as being one of the most absolute amazing kung fu movies ever made! Unlike many of those films this one deserves the credit.

San Te is a thoughtful young student who becomes increasingly involved in opposition to the Manchu government. Everyone is beginning to suffer terribly. The evil Manchu are trying to quietly take over an area of Canton. His friend and instructor tells him they must take action before all the civilians are murdered!

Chia Hui Lui brings genuine love of his family and people to the role. He is humble and a loyal friend. In a way this was a coming of age film for Chia Hui Lui.

During a brutal Manchu attack, San Te manages to escape and wants to go to Shaolin to devote himself to learning the martial arts in order to seek revenge and learn how to protect his people. But San Te was injured in the Manchu raid and is very ill. With help he does manage to get to Shaolin but not in the fighting shape he had planned. The monks at first refuse to let him stay there. If the enemy finds out they are harboring a criminal the monastery could be destroyed. Finally the chief Abbot shows mercy and lets San Te stay after he is healed and learn the ways of the thirty five chambers.

San Te is an eager student but still manages to get into trouble with his child like moments. Chia Hui Liu does seem to have a sense of endearing innocence about him at times. He is in great condition but not perfect and some of the chambers are a lot more difficult than they appear. There are also chambers you haven’t seen before and weapons rarely used on screen. There are plenty of reviews that will tell you every chamber and weapon used if you must know in advance. However it takes away from some of the surprises to be found at the Shaolin monastery.

I’m not going to spoil anything so you will have to watch this for yourself. And this is definitely a movie that demands more than one viewing!

As San Te progresses he is challenged to more than one fight by an elder monk. He has to use his brain more than brawn to defeat his opponent.

Nearly at the end of his education he is “exiled” as a way to allow him help his people. He is free to return to the world at large, primarily his home town and helps people learn how to defend themselves. The situation escalates until San Te must deal with the Manchu government to lead a revolution he is committed to in order to save his people and all who are oppressed.

This movie really shows Chia Hui Liu’s enormous talents! You do not get to see every single chamber, that movie would be days long. But you get to see quite a bit you probably haven’t seen before.

To the director’s credit there is virtually no invasive humor. What humor there is focuses primarily on San Te’s efforts to get through the chambers.

The cinematography (Yeh-Tai Huang, Arthur Wong) was very good for the fight scenes and Shaolin training . The music by Yung-Yu Chen is nothing special but works with the movie.

The 36th Chamber was such a success for the cast, crew, and Shaw Brothers it was decided to make a sequel entitled, “Return To The 36th Chamber” and yet a third, “Disciples Of The 36th Chamber.” Do not expect the same characters and names in the later films. The most important movie to focus on is the original.

Highly Recommended.

JJ Hatfield’s Rating: 8.5/10


By Numskull

Welcome to the Museum of Overrated Motion Pictures, everyone! My name is Numskull…well, that’s not my REAL name, of course, but, you know…and I’ll be your tour guide. If you’ll be kind enough to deposit some of your hard-earned money in the donation box so the security guard can steal it after visiting hours, we can begin.

Here’s our first exhibit: 36th Chamber of Shaolin, starring Gordon Liu, also known as Lau Ka Fai, and directed and choreographed by Liu Chia-Liang, whom many of you may know better as Lau Kar Leung, the man who directed most of Drunken Master 2 but got fired by Jackie Chan because he…meaning Liu…wanted the martial arts element to be more accurate than was customary for that film’s illustrious star.

Is there a question back there? The restrooms? They’re over there. Down the hall, on the left. You’re welcome.

This film is one of many from the period…1978, to be exact…that has multiple titles. It also goes by the names of “Master Killer” and “Shaolin Master Killer.” We believe that “36th Chamber of Shaolin” is the most appropriate title, however, since there comes a point when the lead character, San Te, proposes the institution of a 36th training chamber in the Shaolin Temple for the benefit of the general Chinese public. But I digress. To start things off…

I’m sorry? What’s that? Oh. That way. Down the hall, on the left. You’re welcome.

To start things off, there’s a secret revolution of sorts against the tyranny of the Manchus, and our hero enlists after watching his family and friends get brutally slaughtered. Not the most imaginative impetus, perhaps, but it serves, and many similarly-themed martial arts films followed. San Te manages to con his way into a sort of unofficial Shaolin scholarship, and… excuse me, young man, but we don’t permit museum patrons to touch the exhibits, especially patrons who have just finished jacking off to the Naked Killer display. Those ropes are there for a reason, you know.

San Te, for some reason, fails to mention his motivations to the temple elders until a whole year is passed, at which point he…

Yes? Oh. Down the hall, on the left. You’re welcome.

At which point he begins a series of grueling training sequences which, in many other kung fu films, would be replaced by fight scenes. 36th Chamber of Shaolin has the distinction of being one of the most, if not THE most training-intensive martial arts films of all time. Mind you, not ALL of the temple’s 35 chambers get their own sequence; that would make for an intolerably long movie.

Speaking of “long”, it seems that some of our guests are really taking their time in the restrooms. Can I have a volunteer to go and make sure everything is all right? Woah! I only need ONE volunteer! You there, why don’t you go? That’s correct, down the hall, on the left. Hurry back.

Where was I? Oh yes, the training chambers. Well, eventually, San Te completes the gamut, and the elders offer him the chance to become the overseer of any one chamber of his choice. Instead, he suggests a 36th chamber be opened so that people other than monks can learn Shaolin self-defense techniques. This proposal outrages the elders, who cast San Te out. From there, the film’s previously laborious pace accelerates drastically.

Huh? Oh, for…down the hall, on the left. Where all the others have gone.

So, San Te goes and starts fighting the Manchus, which is something the film has built up to for about an hour and a half. When all is said and done…

WHAT?!? Are you deaf?!? Down the fuckin’ hall, on the fuckin’ left. Yeah, you too, asshole.

After all I’ve done for this place, here’s where I end up; alone in front of a kung fu movie that’s almost all training sequences, behind glass, roped off, on a fuckin’ pedestal it doesn’t deserve, talking to myself. A tour guide without a tour group. A fine thing! Hey Mike, tell the boss I quit. I’m heading someplace where my skills will be appreciated!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Welcome to the Museum of Overrated Rock and Roll albums, everyone! My name is Numskull…well, that’s not my REAL name, of course, but, you know…and I’ll be your tour guide. If you’ll be kind enough to deposit some of your hard-earned money in the donation box so I won’t have to eat my shoes tomorrow, we can begin.

Here’s our first exhibit: The Dark Side of the Moon, by Pink Floyd. This 1973 release stayed on the Billboard charts for…

Pardon me? Oh. Down the hall, on the left. You’re welcome.

Numskull’s Rating: 5/10


By S!DM

One of the all-time great kung-fu movies, this one ranks up there with Enter the Dragon and Drunken Master 2. It’s almost perfect, has impeccable pacing, and great fighting also (what would you expect from a Shaw Brothers film?).

Lau Kar Leung (Liu Chia~Liang) directs this movie masterfully (Filmed in “Shaw Scope”! the film proclaims at the beginning) and makes good use of the colorful surroundings and interesting characters, the central of which is San Te, played by Gordon Liu. San Te is a young fellow who witnesses the killing of a Ming dynasty “rebel” at the hands of the evil Manchus. Being the young guy that he is, he goes and asks his teacher why there is no democracy and inadvertently joins his teacher and a choice few students in rebelling against the government. When the Manchus find out, they kill San Te’s family. San Te, wanting revenge, joins the Shaolin temple and stays for 7 years to learn kung fu from the temple’s existing 35 chambers. Some training sequences are hilarious, some serious, but all are classic.

My favorite chamber was the one in which the junior monks have to pound their heads on sand bags without getting dizzy…It’s very amusing. Well, after his servitude is up, he heads out of the temple and beats up his aggressors…every single one of them. After his anger is diminished, San Te heads back to the temple a hero, and founds his own chamber, the “36th Chamber of Shaolin.” This chamber is built to train anyone who wants to learn the formerly secretive art of Shaolin kung fu.

The only gripe I had was that the beginning of the film was unnecessarily long, but if you stick around, you will be treated to some of the finest kung fu ever filmed.

S!DM’s Rating: 10/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , |

The Last Godfather aka The Dumb Mafia DVD (Lionsgate)

The Last Godfather aka The Dumb Mafia DVD (Lionsgate)

The Last Godfather aka The Dumb Mafia DVD (Lionsgate)

RELEASE DATE: August 9, 2011

This Korean/American co-production was written, directed by and starring Korean comedian/celebrity Hyung-Rae Shim. Mob boss Don Carini (Harvey Keitel) is retiring from the Mafia business – but when he gathers the family to announce his heir, the Don surprises everyone by anointing his goofy adopted son Young-gu (Hyung-Rae Shim) as the next godfather. Check out the trailer here.

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |