Kamui Gaiden | aka Kamui The Lone Ninja (2009) Review

"Kamui Gaiden" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“Kamui Gaiden” Japanese Theatrical Poster

AKA: Kamui
Director: Yoichi Sai
Cast: Ken ichi Matsuyama, Koyuki Koyuki, Kaoru Kobayashi, Koichi Sato, Hideaki Ito
Running Time: 120 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

“Kamui Gaiden” is the story of a Kamui (Ken’ichi Matsuyama), an ex-evil ninja who turns his back on his evil ways to pursue a peaceful lifestyle. However, everywhere he goes, he is followed and attacked by his former ninja clan, who now consider him a traitor.

“Kamui Gaiden” (not to be confused with “The Dagger of Kamui,” a novel/anime that explores similar themes) is based on the popular manga “The Legend of Kamui,” but don’t let that fool you into thinking you’re walking into a happy-go-lucky, bubblegum tale. Sure, it has its cutesy moments, but mark my word – this flick is bloody, brutal, and surprisingly, downbeat.

The martial arts choreography is swift, simple and easy on the eye. As expected in a ‘ninja’ film, there a bit of jumping and flying around, but it never gets completely out of hand. The cgi effects, which are spotty, somehow work. I enjoyed the brief descriptions of Kamui’s specialized attack moves, which are reminiscent to reading about what a video game character can do.

Not all the action consists of blades flying, dicing and slicing; there’s a brief moment where are Kamui takes on killer sharks, which seems a bit out of place (I’m not sure if this is a scene taken from the manga).

Whether it’s Korean, Chinese or Japanese, I’m not the biggest fan of these newer swordplay/fantasy/period/martial arts movies. These types of films bore me to death. Call me an old geezer, but I’ll take some 1960/1970’s Shaw Brothers shit before the majority of this new stuff any day.

“Kamui Gaiden” is an exception. Together with a brief Manga-style intro, and an opening action sequence (think George Miller’s “Road Warrior,” only without the cars), “Kamui” grabbed my attention instantly. There are some slow-moving, talky instances, but for the most part, the film is never boring.

See if you can spot Hong Kong star Ekin Cheng (“Young and Dangerous”), who has an extended cameo in the film (even in Japan we can’t get away from this guy).

Recommended.

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 7/10

Posted in Japanese, Ninja, Reviews | Tagged , , , |

Bruce Lee: The Man, The Myth (1976) Review

"Bruce Lee: The Man, The Myth" US Theatrical Poster

“Bruce Lee: The Man, The Myth” US Theatrical Poster

AKA: Bruce Lee – True Story
Director: Ng See Yuen
Cast: Bruce Li (aka Ho Chung Tao, James Ho), Unicorn Chan, Chu Chi Ling. Fung King Man, Alan Chui Chung San, Sham Chin Bo, Mars, Fung Hak On, Lee Hoi San, Carl Scott, Chung Chaan Chi, Fong Yuen, Gam Tin Chue, Lau Kwok Shing, Leung Siu Chung, Wong Mei, Yip Chun
Running Time: 85/90 min.

By Joseph Kuby

Fun Filler!

Like The Dragon Lives (a.k.a. He’s A Legend, He’s A Hero), Bruce Lee: The Man, The Myth (a.k.a. Bruce Lee: The True Story) shouldn’t be taken too seriously.

The film practically steers away from his life as a father and husband, so whilst Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story would win out in that regard (as well as being, cinematically, the superior film) the latter is just simply an expensive version of the Bruceploitation movies made in a bygone age (as Bruce Thomas rightfully so pointed out and argued in his book Bruce Lee: Fighting Spirit).

It provides good hokey comedy value and whilst the film isn’t a comedy laughathon riot like Dragon Lives, it still has its fair share of comic moments like the old caucasian man Bruce meets at the car wash and the scenes where we see Bruce working out in resembles a laboratory than an exercise facility and his training room (which is certainly nothing like Bruce had ever worked out in…and at one point it even resembles a medieval weaponary chamber/S&M-esque room)!

Whilst there is some basis in reality in that Bruce had done weight training, jogged and did electro-shock therapy; I doubt Bruce performed a contemporary/post-modern version of the training Jimmy Wang Yu’s character anticipated in for the film The Chinese Boxer i.e. dipping your hands onto a hot substance (in Jimmy’s case, it’s iron and in Bruce’s case it’s some kind of stereotypical foaming-at-the-seams laboratory chemical basin).

What did it for me (humour wise) was when it depicts Lee punching into these increasingly smaller holes in a giant mechanical device that beeps and lights up these varied coloured bulbs as it registers the force of his hits – it foreshadows a similar scene in Dragon Lives.

Come to think of it, the only scene that’s portrayed with the most accuracy is Bruce’s death scene as Betty Ting Pei, Raymond Chow and her respective doctor try to wake up Bruce before calling an ambulance to take him to the Queen Elizabeth hospital.

With all the moments of inaccuracy and conjecture that drown the film, it’s a wonder that they even bothered to find out that Bruce had been selling his script of The Silent Flute to Hollywood film moguls.

Astonishingly, they were even spot on with the original idea for Game Of Death where Bruce was to fight 7 martial arts champs! (check out the features section on this site to read the Bob Wall interview for more information)

The dubbing was very different than all the usual Kung Fu movies because the recording sessions were done in America. In some ways this film is similar to ‘Exit The Dragon, Enter The Tiger’ in that not only is the dubbing more unique & better but the soundtrack is composed with more originality than usual and with better choice of tracks (again, one cue from a 007 flick), though it frankly doesn’t compare to the brilliant soundtrack that permeated James Ho’s other flick. However, the war cries used for both Bruce and his assailants is laughable and in some occasions badly synched. Other similarities are the high production values as the film was shot in Seattle, San Francisco, Long Beach, Bangkok, Hong Kong and Rome (they actually did location shooting in the colosseum). Of further note is the feel of a Western feature as there are lots of caucasian actors and it’s pretty clear that a lot of the dialogue scenes were originally shot in English.

Of course, it’s the fight scenes which sell the picture as they are neatly choreographed with a very tight feel to them with little sense of rehearsal (something which reflects Bruce Lee’s philosophy of realistic fights not being rehearsed routines) thus the fight scenes have a natural feel to them.

As you can imagine from the geographical scope of the story, there’s a welcome mixture of styles such as Karate, Thai boxing, traditional Kung Fu and Bruce Lee’s Jeet Kune Do (the stylized version anyway).

Speaking of scope, the film has a pool of talented faces and we even get cameos from people who appeared in Bruce Lee’s Big Boss and Way Of The Dragon. Just to list a few examples: Billy Chong co-star Carl Scott can be seen as one of Bruce’s students in the American section of the film. Alan Hsu (villain in Wong Jing’s Last Hero In China and senior of the protagonists’ Kung Fu school in the Joseph Kuo/Yuen Woo Ping collaborative effort ‘Born Invincible’) has a cameo along with Jackie Chan’s best friend Mars (who can be seen in Dragon Lord) and I think even Lo Wei as himself during the shooting of The Big Boss.

Directorially, the film has its moments such as when Bruce thinks back to a conversation with a Hollywood executive producer as he’s in a dark room at night time where the whole screen darkens & lightens before and after the flashback. Another nice touch was a juxtaposition sequence prior to this challenge match where Bruce’s challenger is being told how to fight Bruce by his cohort while Bruce is telling his assistant about the very last fight scene which needs filming.

Conclusively, there’s one scene towards the very end of the film which gestures to how Bruce could have died as it alludes to the mere notion that he had been ambushed by street thugs armed with machetes. The way the scene is filmed half-way through the slaughter seems to have been lifted from a Shaw Bros. movie directed by Chang Cheh as the whole screen turns red, the quality of the print is shiny and it’s played in slow motion with a wise choice of camera angles to accentuate what is an otherwise grisly and somewhat tacked-on scene.

My personal disappointment with this release of the film (UK DVD) is the quality of the film print (which is one of the worst I’ve experienced DVD wise though there are worse prints out there e.g. prints where the image is completely damaged {numbers, cigar burns, scratches} and where colours are hardly existant and all you see is one hue of a particular colour plastered all over the screen making everything seem single-coloured and rather monotone).

To rub salt onto old wounds, there’s even a nunchaku scene which has been trimmed (ironically when the film details Bruce’s making of Way Of The Dragon, ironic because just like in the original UK version of Bruce Lee’s classic movie, as soon as James Ho takes off his jacket we immediately cut to what happens after the nunchaku encounter). It’s kind of a shame really as the concept of the fight scene seemed ace: Bruce utilizing a nunchaku to counteract the mace of a Karateka.

Missed opportunity on behalf of the filmmakers to add some depth to the film if they took the film more seriously (i.e. make it as credible as it is incredible), but still a fun effort that should please Bruce Lee fans and chop-socky aficionados who don’t seem to mind watching films where a star is exploited for the gain of big bucks and shallow entertainment – though having said that there’s much better in that regard (especially within the realm of Bruceploitation fare…or really farce)!

UK fans beware, the UK DVD entitled Bruce Lee: True Story is not the same as the American disc as not only are the special features related to the film absent, but it’s not even the same film (it’s Bruce Lee’s Secret which is also available in the UK as The Bruce Lee Story and will be released on a new disc entitled Bruce Lee’s Secret) despite featuring the same cover art and even stills from this film (e.g. the electro-shock therapy bit).

Josephy Kuby’s Rating: 7/10


By Numskull

OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS!!!

Check this out… I’ve just learned all about my new idol Bruce Lee (sorry Mr. Spock, you’ve been replaced!) from this badass movie, BRUCE LEE: THE MAN, THE MYTH. I’m telling you, it’s DA BOMB!!!

Bruce Lee is from a place called “Hong Kong.” You with me so far? And he practices… nay, EMBODIES the awesome art of KUNG FU!!! What is kung fu, you ask? Well basically it’s used to beat up bad guys by hitting them hard and fast… even more hard and fast than the X-Men when their sense of teamwork is at an all time high! There are other kinds of fighting out there like “karate” from Japan (home of Voltron!) and “thai boxing” from a place called Siam, but KUNG FU beats them all! Wherever Bruce goes, people who study these weenie fighting styles challenge him to prove that their style is the best but Bruce beats them all without breaking a sweat! It’s even more one sided than if Superman fought Batman without all of his stupid gadgets he uses since he doesn’t have super powers. The other really cool thing about Kung Fu is that it’s also the name of a totally rad Nintendo game I have where you control a guy named Thomas. He can punch AND kick AND jump! I’m not past the first level yet (that guy with the stick is really hard!), but Bruce never gives up so neither will I!

Anyway back to the movie. Bruce goes to Seattle for his education and he teaches some of his fellow students some kung fu, and since he’s such a sport, he does it for FREE, and pumps gas to earn money! After college he gets a sidekick named Butchie. Well I guess every great role model needs a sidekick. The Lone Ranger has Tonto, Snoopy has Woodstock, and even after Superman beats him up Batman will still have Robin with his sexy green underwear. Bruce wins a fighting tournament in Long Beach in a building where everything is orange, and he develops a super powerful form of kung fu called jeet kune do, and he gets married and has two children, and he makes his own movies, and he fight bullies who pick on the little guy wherever he goes, most notably a fat old white guy who is going bald! And he proves that he’s the real deal when he says one of the greatest movie lines of all time: “I’m not doing the talking here, kung fu is!” WOAH! Move over, Dirty Harry!

The fights in this movie are unbelievable! I’ve never seen anyone move so fast…. not even me, when I got chased out of the girls’ bathroom! Right punch! Left punch! Jump kick! TAKE THAT! HIIIIIIYYYYAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!! Sorry I got a little carried away there! But who could blame me? This is a movie that now has a permanent home in my brand new Betamax VCR, and I am proud to have the video box displayed on my shelf. It looks so cool sitting there surrounded by my Star Wars guys; Chewie on one side and the Fett-man on the other! Yeah, baby!

I think my favorite fight scene is the one in Rome where Bruce fights three guys in the Coliseum. The Coliseum is where gladiators fight! I beat Bruce could beat Russell Crowe with both hands tied behind his back, and he could do the same to a modern day gladiator, Hulk Hogan! The Hulkster may be a true American and Hulkamania definitely rules but Bruce has the awesome power of jeet kune do on his side! Anyway Bruce fights these guys and when it becomes obvious that they are no match for him their boss throws one of them a light mace. Well that’s no good! Doesn’t he know that a light mace only does 1d6 damage, plus or minus the user’s Strength modifier? I bet not even a Fireball cast by a level 20 wizard could kill Bruce. He’s just that damn good! So in response to the mace Bruce pulls out these two sticks connected by a chain and wields them with incredible skill! Soon he wins the fight and earns the respect of everyone watching, especially ME!!!

Now for the shocking part: the movie ends on a sad note as Bruce suddenly gets a splitting headache and DIES… or does he? According to the movie, many people believe that Bruce is living in seclusion (in spite of his tombstone… which, by the way, is RED!!!) and will make his triumphant return in 1983, ten years after his death was announced. I’m marking off the days on my Dukes of Hazzard calendar already! But in the meantime, I wonder what Bruce’s wife is up to and whether or not receiving his mighty jeet kune seed gave her jeet kune powers of her own and increased her physical performance to its full jeet kune capacity? If so I would not want to mess with her. She would beat me up even worse than the girls on the playground!

Now I know what you’re thinking! “Wait a minute…if Bruce Lee is dead or in hiding, then how did they make a movie about him?” I’m glad you asked! You see, Bruce Lee had amazing powers of foresight in addition to his phenomenal combat skills. BRUCE LEE: THE MAN, THE MYTH is pieced together from footage shot of Bruce by the cameraman who followed him everywhere while he was still around and they even made sure we could hear everything by having some other guy do his voice so it wouldn’t be obscured by the sounds of traffic and everything! I just wish that they included every single piece of footage ever shot so the movie would be 35 years long (Bruce was around from 1940 to 1973)!

In conclusion I would just like to say that this is the greatest movie ever and LONG LIVE BRUCE LEE!!!

Numskull’s Rating: 2/10


By Joe909

This was the film that marked Bruce Li’s rise from mediocrity to capable on-screen fighter. Instead of unconvincing mimicry, Li suddenly evolved into a lightning-quick martial artist. The irony is that this is an outright Bruce Lee biopic, instead of the usual run of the mill, early Bruce Li movie, where he just pretends to be Bruce Lee but fights like a drunk clown.

The reason behind Li’s advanced style is due to the fact that he trained like a demon for this role, practicing jeet kune do from morning to night. Bruce Li toiled as hard as a Mexican day worker for his movies. Nowhere is that more apparent than in his sudden excellence in on-screen combat. Just watch “The New Game of Death,” from 1975, and then watch this, a movie released two years later, but probably filmed in 1976. It’s like night and day.

Of course, this being a Bruceploitation flick, you’re treated to a large number of fights. More than can easily be digested in one sitting. Bruce fights muggers, Japanese opponents, Mafia thugs, irate kickboxers, cocky extras, and even a metal wall with flashing lights. “Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story” has been dragged through the mud over the past few years, but it’s still a more realistic depiction of Bruce Lee’s life than this. “Dragon” just overdoes the PC element with its portrayal of a jilted Bruce struggling against racism, whereas The Man, The Myth overdoes the “greatest fighter in the world” element with Bruce fighting anyone and everyone in his path.

As a matter of fact, the producers are so intent over showing Bruce fight that they even skip over things an audience might find important, like Bruce getting married and starting a family. Literally, Bruce’s wife and kids just appear midway into the movie, without any introduction. As a side note, the actress playing Bruce’s wife is a dead ringer for the real Linda Lee Caldwell.

An interesting thing about this movie is that it features several familiar faces from past Bruce Lee movies. There are a few actors and extras from “The Big Boss,” a fat thug from “Way of the Dragon” shows up as an English Army sergeant (who of course challenges Bruce), and most notably, Unicorn Chan (Jimmy in “Way of the Dragon”) shows up as himself.

I’ve always wondered about this. Unicorn Chan was one of Bruce Lee’s oldest friends. They had a falling out in late 1972, when Unicorn starred in a movie called “Fist of Unicorn.” The reason for the falling out: Bruce agreed to do choreography for the film. But, unknown to him, Unicorn and the director filmed everything Bruce did, and then, without his approval, injected this behind-the-scenes footage into “Fist of Unicorn.” Bruce was outraged and betrayed, and never spoke to Unicorn again. He was even in the process of pressing charges when he died. So I’ve always wondered if Unicorn’s appearing in this biopic (and, should I mention, Unicorn himself was soon to die, in a car crash a year later) was maybe his way of paying a debt to the real Bruce Lee. Or hell, maybe he was just making another buck off of exploiting his dead friend.

Another interesting note is that for one scene near the end of the flick, a different dubber takes over Bruce’s voice. Maybe the US/British prints got jumbled or something. I have the US-dubbed version, and throughout Bruce sounds like some 1970s Chicano from New York. He really does. But then, in the scene where he meets Betty Pei at her apartment, Bruce is suddenly dubbed by one of those Shaw Brothers voice actors. It’s pretty weird, and I wonder if this is in every US version. Maybe the US producers forgot to dub this scene.

Probably my favorite part of the movie is the end. “There was much mystery surrounding Bruce Lee’s death,” announces the narrator, “and many legends arose over how he might have died.” This leads you to believe that the producers are about to shun these ideas. But no, because right after that the narrator says “Here are a few of those myths.” So we’re treated to a variety of scenes of how Bruce might have “really” died.

In one, he’s murdered by thugs who chop him up with knives. In another, he’s killed in an ambush. But in the best of all, the last one, Bruce doesn’t die, but instead goes off into seclusion, where he will live alone until 1984, at which point he will return to the world. Why? Because a Chinese mystic tells him that the whole world must think he is dead, even his wife and children. And only after ten years has past may Bruce safely walk in public again. Never mind that Bruce died in 1973, so ten years later would’ve been 1983, not ’84. Dates and numbers weren’t much on the producers’s minds; they even say that Bruce was 36 when he died, when we all know he was only 33.

All in all, this is more of a chop-sockey than a serious Bruce Lee biopic, so don’t let the revisionists fool you. “Dragon” is still the superior film.

Joe909’s Rating: 7/10

Posted in Bruceploitation, Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , |

Machete (2010) Review

"Machete" US Theatrical Poster

“Machete” US Theatrical Poster

AKA: Grindhouse, Machete
Director: Robert Rodriguez, Ethan Maniquis
Cast: Danny Trejo, Steven Seagal, Michelle Rodriguez, Jeff Fahey, Cheech Marin, Lindsay Lohan, Don Johnson, Jessica Alba, Robert De Niro, Tom Savini, Shea Whigham
Running Time: 105 min.

By Ningen

Danny Trejo plays the titular character, an ex-Mexican cop-turned-migrant worker who gets caught up in a conspiracy between some rich guy and the drug dealer by the name of Torrez (Steven Seagal) who killed his family. With the help of a freedom fighter/illegal alien enabler named Luz (Michelle Rodriguez) and an American immigration agent named Sartana, he plans to take down the whole operation. Along the way, he has to deal with a xenophobic Senator played by Robert DeNiro and a local militia movement.

So the good news is we finally get an R-rated movie which doesn’t flinch from the violence, but which doesn’t get off on it, either. The lead doesn’t look like a squeaky-clean teenager or 20-something who relies on bullet-time every other shot to get his/her point across. I don’t have to listen to boring conversations about the personal lives of the supporting female characters, either. And you won’t get short-changed on the nudity, as long as you don’t expect it to be from any actual celebrities in the film.

The bad news is this flick ends up being talkier than necessary. Yeah, cashing in on the controversy in AZ makes sense, but that doesn’t mean I want to hear people debate about the issue. Just keep it simple and allude to it, like that recent trailer for Machete. And Seagal apparently wants to out-do Will Sasso’s parody of him [Just look for “MADTV Seagal” on Youtube if you don’t get it already.], since he comes off as a super-brute, rather than a real threat. In addition he just sits behind a monitor most of the time practicing for a stage version of the DePalma Scarface.

And Rodriguez really goes overboard on the extras. The film should be about one-on-one fights, and I generally either get re-enactments of John Woo shoot-outs or the low-rider answer to Braveheart. You do get plenty of knife-fight porn, though, but I wish there wasn’t so much quick cutting of it.

I have no problem with most of the female talent, however, even though Lohan seems like she hasn’t detoxed yet when she appropriately plays the rich guy’s fallen daughter. Still, I usually get more irritated when Alba thinks she’s above her usual school of softcore porn-style acting, and once again-besides in Sin City-RR managed to make her likeable and more down to earth. As someone who is caught between her American and Mexican backgrounds, and she’s not able to easily make quick decisions like everyone else. Michelle Rodriguez could have had more action scenes in her place, though, since I could buy her being able to kick ass more than Alba.

The quips and b-movie mannerisms of the characters in general are pretty catchy, but not quite loose enough. The actors take the material a little too seriously at times, when they should be able to have fun with the lines. But then, as I noted earlier, they’re held back by the direction where they’re forced to focus too much on the issues, and not enough on the setting. And yeah, even the ending is dragged out longer than necessary with a pointless DeNiro sub-plot. Still, Machete’s enjoyable for what it is, and I hope, if that alleged sequel happens, it’ll be a smoother ride.

Ningen’s Rating: Nudity: 8/10; Comedy: 8/10; Action and Pacing: 6.5/10; Overall: 7.5/10

Posted in Asian Related, Other Movies, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , |

Merantau | aka Merantau Warrior (2009) Review

"Merantau" International Theatrical Poster

“Merantau” International Theatrical Poster

Director: Gareth Evans
Producer: Ario Sagantoro
Cast: Iko Uwais, Sisca Jessica, Christine Hakim, Donny Alamsyah, Yusuf Aulia, Laurent Buson, Alex Abbad, Mads Koudal, Yayan Ruhian, Rahyma Yanii
Running Time: 135 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Young Yuda (Iko Uwais) has reached the point in his life where he must leave his hometown, prove his manhood, and find success on his own. It’s his way of following a family tradition known as “Merantau.” So Yuda, a Silat (a Southeast Asian fighting method) expert, heads to the big city of Jakarta, with hopes to make a living by teaching children his martial arts style.

Upon his arrival, he saves a woman (Sisca Jessica) from gangsters, who happen to be connected to a sinister sex trade operation. What follows is a violent adventure that leaves Yuda with a lot more “Merantau” than he bargained for.

Essentially, Merantau is an Indonesian film, but note that it’s directed by Gareth Evans, a Welsh born writer/director (known of his ultra-violent, critically acclaimed debut feature Footsteps). It was during the filming of a documentary series The Mystic Arts of Indonesia: Pencak Silat, that he took special notice in Iko Uwais, a charismatic young man with a solid Silat background. Evans immediately handpicked him for the role of “Yuda,” the main character in a martial arts movie script he had been working on. The rest is history…

What’s makes Merantau so special is Gareth Evans – he’s one hell of a filmmaker! This is a director who treats a martial arts movie with a little more passion than the next guy. Cinematography (beautiful), plot (simple, yet effective), soundtrack (non-tacky) and performances (Iko Uwais has a bright future) aside, we have ourselves a perfectly paced film with a build up that pays off with every minutes that passes.

The action choreography in Merantau is impressive, but far from the best. It’s not as fast and furious as Jackie Chan’s in his heyday (80’s Jackie Chan movies are practically the blueprint for what they wanted to achieve in the action department); Nor is it as intense and brutal as any of Tony Jaa’s movies. However, when the fights are judged within the film’s entire context, they’re actually more exciting. It’s amazing what good content can do to action sequences.

There’s not a lot of that slow motion bullshit or physical circus acts (hopping through hoops or swinging off animals) shoved down are faces. Instead of fight after fight, our hero takes time to catch his breath; Sometimes even meditating to prepare for the next wave of destruction. Gone are the non-action, mediocre filler scenes. No stupid sidekick for comedy relief. Everything is filmed with quality in mind.

Iko Uwais is not a poor man’s Tony Jaa (at first glance of the poster or even the trailer, I can see why some would think that). He’s a natural who is able to pull off a tough guy role without being robotic. Take note of the scene where Uwais hangs up the phone, steps out of the booth, and walks towards the gang to save a woman. He comes across like a real badass.

Merantau is a great movie with an awesome team of choreographers and stuntmen working on the action. And Evans is a skillful director who puts 100% concentration on overlooking the package as a whole. It’s no wonder why Merantau works on so many levels.

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 8/10

Posted in All, Indonesian, Reviews | Tagged , , |

Bruce Lee: A Dragon Story | aka Dragon Dies Hard (1974) Review

"Bruce Lee: A Dragon Story" US Theatrical Poster

“Bruce Lee: A Dragon Story” US Theatrical Poster

Director: Shut Dik
Writer: Lui Ban-Chung
Cast: Bruce Li (Ho Chung Tao, James Ho), Na Yan-Sau, Tang Pei, Cheung Tai-Wai, Gam Wing-Cheung, Chu Sing-Yat, Cheng Fu-Hung, Si Wai, Ngai Yat-Ping, Kong Kwok-Ping, Ann Winston, Chow Jun Shih Ting-Ken
Running Time: 90 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Made in 1974, about a year after Bruce Lee’s death, “Bruce Lee: A Dragon Story” is possibly the first bio-pic on Bruce Lee. It’s also the most dark, action-less and melodramatic of them all. Unlike the constant beat-em-ups in “Bruce Lee: The Man/The Myth”, this is the complete opposite.

One thing’s for sure, “Bruce Lee: A Dragon Story” is downright gutsy, as it wastes no time exploiting the major players:

Bruce Lee: He’s a selfish, uncaring, insensitive bastard who like to neglect his white-bread wife. He also doesn’t know how to shave his scruffy mustache.

Betty Ting Pei: She’s a psychotic, depressed, short-tempered alcoholic; Not to mention an excessive-gambling little whore. At one point in the film, she’s pregnant with Bruce’s baby… (?)

Nora Miao: She’s jealous of all the attention Bruce gives to Betty. Judging from the look in her eyes, she wants to ride Bruce’s cock just as much.

Lo Wei: A money-grubbing fat fuck who sits back in his chair and smokes his pipe, while his grips do the filmmaking. This one is accurate.

Raymond Chow: Like Lo Wei, he’s also a money-grubbing bastard, only half the weight. He doesn’t care for Bruce, he only cares for the numbers at the box office.

Linda Lee: She spends the entire time looking like the saddest woman to ever hold a Martini. I’m surprised they didn’t portray her as some heartless wench who cheated on Bruce while he was in Hong Kong.

Sir Run Run Shaw: This guy was too cheap to give Bruce Lee $10,000 per picture: “Our most famous stars only make $1,000 per picture”, he says. Another one that’s accurate. Sir Run Run Shaw’s biggest mistake.

As you can see, the film is centered on either Bruce’s strange romance with Betty Ting Pei or Bruce’s ups and downs with the film business. It also explores all the back-stabbing idiots who come along with it. Most of the camera time in the film’s second half is given to Betty. In fact, the film ends abruptly – right after Bruce’s death – with Betty walking around on an isolated beach over some high-pitched canto-pop ballad.

The lack of action is probably for the better. As it was extremely amateur-like, even compared to some of Bruce Li’s worst choreographed films.

Make no mistake, “Bruce Lee: A Dragon Story” is a terrible Bruceploitation movie. The shits and giggles come automatically due to its horrendous dubbing (it’s so bad, it’s good!) and all that other cheesy retro stuff.

Mighty Peking Man’s Review: 4/10

Posted in Bruceploitation, Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , |

Bruce and the Shaolin Bronzemen (1980) Review

"Bruce and the Shaolin Bronzemen" Finnish VHS Cover

“Bruce and the Shaolin Bronzemen” Finnish VHS Cover

AKA: King Boxer 2
Director: Joseph Kong
Producer: Robert Jeffrey
Cast: Bruce Le (aka Huang Kin Long, Wong Kin Lung), Chan Sing, Lita Vasquez, Chang Lee, Ruby Anna, Cloyd Robinson, Nona Herrera, Vivian Velasco, Ernie Ortega, Tsing Tong Tsai, Angel Confiado, Ruben Ramos, Jimmy Cruz, Romeo Blanco, Joe Canlas, Ely Rufuerzo, Ed Ramos, Nanding De La Cruz, Bill Feijoo
Running Time: 78 min.

By Joseph Kuby

One film critic put it best when he said…

“With all the realism and reason in most today’s movies, this was briskly anarchistic in terms of boring rules of movie making.”

The credits verify this. We have a Perry Boy, Peedoy, D’vultures, Paeng Giant and SOS Daredevils (Filipino’s elite stunt team). There’s an actor called Chang Lee whose name is separated, giving the impression of two one-name actors.

King Boxer 2 seems to be a family affair. We have a trio of Velascos (Joseph, Vivian and Leonardo) and a quintet of Ramos’ (Ruben, Ed, Ever, Segundo and Amber). The disjointed nature of the production may as well have been due to a case of family feud or nepotism that may have occurred on set or off.

The plot is best described as a comedic version of The Gold Connection with everyone getting their necks deep into some priceless treasure all the while a mysterious hit man keeps a watchful eye. The stark contrast in those films is akin to comparing Jackie Chan’s distinctive (to the point of conflictive) 1993 efforts, City Hunter and Crime Story.

However, Bruce Le (a less talented Chinese Jeff Bridges) is no match for James Ho (or Dragon Lee for that matter) and for a Filipino actioner it could have done with Inosanto’s presence to seal the deal on the martial arts stakes. Given today’s climate when it comes to action cinema, I think the whole world could benefit from seeing an authentic Filipino action hero who reveled in the beauty of Escrima and the likes.

I admire Dan for helping Escrima and Jeet Kune Do gain more exposure in the West but his mastery of the martial arts, along with his knowledge of action directing, could have made him an ideal stunt coordinator for the Filipino film industry. His creative input could have easily bolstered the quality and boosted their place in world cinema and right now we would have decent quality films from the Philippines that would rival Ong Bak in their artistry. Daniel Inosanto could have done for the Filipino film industry what Bruce Lee did for the Chinese one.

That may seem like a bold comment to make but bearing in mind that Danny’s experience on Hollywood and Hong Kong features gave him a truly dual-world perspective, an advantage that not many people had back in 1982. As such, Filipino action cinema has been stunted in its growth as a powerhouse in action film-making. Filipino cinema, as a result, has been impeded with the cheap-as-hell tag.

As you can tell from what can be read above, this is a somewhat disappointing film which had the potential to genuinely put Filipino action movies on the market but alas this film is ruined with a loosely connected plot whose unfocused narrative makes the confusing mess of Enter the Game of Death look startlingly linear.

Both movies were made by Joseph Velasco (a.k.a. Joseph Kong Hung) but unlike the latter (which was the film he made prior to this), this one lacks any real sense of coherence despite the protagonist seeming to have more drive and purpose in his actions than in the previous outing. To say there’s plot holes would be a vicious understatement. You’d think bad decisions with the editing, rather than the script, are what caused these gaps.

Unlike their previous collaboration, there are no celebrity look-alikes. For instance, in Enter the Game of Death there’s a Caucasian man with dark hair and facial hair who looks like British comic Jimmy Carr and one of the black martial artists looks like Michael Winslow from Police Academy (I saw this film lately at a house party and one of my friends swears it’s him). Don’t let that put you off King Boxer 2. The film isn’t too far from the term “so bad it’s good.”

The director is the same dude responsible for Bruce’s Deadly Fingers (which boasted having Lieh, Nora and Bolo), Bruce and Dragon Fist, My Name Called Bruce (written by a Zackey Chan), Bruce and Shaolin Kung Fu, Enter Three Dragons (a.k.a. The Dragon on Fire which had Philip Ko, Bolo, Lee Hoi San and Bruce Lei or Dragon Lee) and Eye of the Dragon (a.k.a. The Ninja Strikes Back with Hwang Jang Lee, Casanova Wong, Bolo, Oddjob and Chick Norris).

He also helmed Return of Bruce (a.k.a. Boxing Brothers which also had Lo*) and Cobra (not with Sly Stallone but with Bruce Lei).

…and I’ve not even hinted at the two “special” Leesploitation chop-sockies he did. Hahahahaha!

As with a lot of martial arts movies, what you can always rely on to salvage a film with a weak plot are stellar action sequences but that depends on how good the action director is. Despite there being plentiful chances for culturally diverse slugfests, the film’s bouts of martial combat range from average to slightly above average barring one truly good duel that happens later on in the film. This happens during the course of the third act (in the beginning of said act) and not surprisingly it’s with another Chinese fighter but I’ll talk about that later.

On the plus side, if you want something that’s unusual to the point of being bizarre (if nonsensical) then you will enjoy watching the eccentricities that are inherent (if not wildly abundant) in this film. The best way to describe this movie is imagine watching a film that was a combination between Godfrey Ho (minus the ninjas) and Ken Russell.

There’s a surrealist tone to this film which makes the film wacky to the point of being incoherent. Not quite in league with Chu Yen Ping’s Fantasy Mission Force or Chan Mei-Kei’s The Eternal Evil of Asia but almost vying for the same level of attention. Honestly, after watching this movie, I’ve come to see Wong Jing as David Lynch.

Let’s see, this film has a bunch of henchmen who are dwarfs (one of whom fires a pistol as if it was a shotgun), a homosexual rapist, a tribe of sickle-armed dwarfs, a very hot snake fist-styled Filipino lady, a group of similarly clad dagger-wielding femme fatales, a murderous obese masseuse, a transvestite who’s accosted by Bruce Le and a team of Shaolin Bronzemen. After all, this was made by the same team who brought us Clones of Bruce Lee. However, the film is misleading with its alternate title of Bruce and the Shaolin Bronzemen as they’re only featured in one scene.

Equally dubious is the title King Boxer 2 as this has nothing in common with Lo Lieh’s breakthrough film. Actually, given the nature of Lo Lieh’s appearance in Big Boss 2**, it would have arguably been more fitting if these two films switched titles. These films would probably have benefited more in reception, especially in the case of Le’s flick since if people can confuse Chinese with Japanese then they can confuse Filipinos with Thais.

With that said, there are a few scenes which seem similar to The Big Boss with one of the antagonists taking pleasure in watching their hired men spar with each other as well as joining in for a martial arts demonstration. Even some dialogue at the end recalls something Lee uttered in the finale of said film.

Notwithstanding possibly intended allusions to Bruce’s first action film, it’s a shame that there weren’t that many Bruceploitation films that capitalized on The Big Boss. The grisly nature of the film’s violence coupled with the prostitute angle was enough for exploitation movie moguls everywhere to expound upon. There was never a Bruceploitation film that truly quenched the thirst of porn pundits and fed the hunger of bloodhounds. Had there been so, exploitation cinema junkies would have sought highly after these films regardless whether they liked martial arts or not.

Opportunities were also missed on directly cashing in on Enter the Dragon. Given the plot elements of escorts and captives, filmmakers could have remade Enter as a “women in prison”*** movie with tons of sexploitation and lots of multi-ethnic diversity to entice global audiences. If Wong Jing was a director in the ‘70s, he would have explored such a concept. Jingie is an exploitive genius who would have given us enough sex, violence, juicy foul language and ‘70s cultural tidbits to satisfy the most ardent of grindhouse fans.

Back to this movie, which should not be confused with Treasure of Bruce Le (directed by Joseph Kuo****), it is a fairly middling affair with slightly meandering direction in light of both characterization and action. If there had to be one film that is required to be watched with friends and consumed substances, in order to be fully enjoyable and not utterly pointless, then this is the one. Whilst the film occasionally shines with inspired moments, it just plods along aimlessly in search of meaningful direction.

Looking back in retrospect, the main deficiency here is the dubbing. No one is a native English speaker so it’s hard to fully immerse ourselves with the interaction that exists between the characters. The dubbing is notable for having artists whose native language is obviously not English. Everyone sounds Mexican. Bruce Le sounds as if he’s dubbed by a Spaniard who sounds like Antonio Banderas. The guy who does the voice-over for Bruce pronounces uncle as “ancel.”

Another issue with the dubbing is that there’s moments when someone is speaking but nothing is heard, something that becomes quite apparent during the fight scenes where the usually present war cries are fairly absent (this happens with other kinds of sound effects during some of the scenes). This makes for an emotionally detached experience, though (save for a few okay actors) the sub-par acting on offer belittles any substantial levels of engagement the filmmakers were aiming to derive from the audience.

Then again, the dubbing could have thwarted some decent voice acting since I’ve always believed that if an actor is limited facially, they can deliver vocally (take for instance John Hurt in The Elephant Man). Maybe someone felt having foreign dubbing made it realistic but that is a jarring thought to consider since the problems of comprehending the dialogue diminish any well intentions of the sort.

The post-production team could have at least attempted in getting an actor like James Hong (who had lent his talent to several characters for the Li feature Exit the Dragon, Enter the Tiger). Gone are voice artists who sound like celebrities (like the Sean Connery soundalike for the villain in Interpol). No longer do we have dubbers who sound like John DeMita (Li’s role in New Game of Death) or Jonathan Frakes (Lung Fei’s villain role in New Game of Death).

George Lucas once said that film is 50% sound and I think this film displays a stark contrast between quality of dubbing and scoring. King Boxer 2 is testament to how much a decent quality soundtrack can enhance the experience of a film. What the film may lack in its visual components, it certainly does not lag with its audio composites. There are some rousing moments of orchestration which help make the film more achieved than it deserves (the accomplished fight scene with the Chinese hit-man being the highlight).

We’re treated to some classic funkadelic beats (‘70s bass lovers will get a kick outta this flick) and one rip-roaring fight scene with a Filipino gang near the beginning is a notable example. Of course, like a lot of the Hong Kong films during the period, this film contrives some cues from other movies (The Sand Pebbles must have been a huge hit in Hong Kong because its music was ripped off majorly for Jackie Chan’s Dragon Fist).

On the surface, the film seems to have the ingredients of a classic Bruceploitation film but it never really gels those ingredients together in a truly cohesive whole. It starts off like a traditional Kung Fu movie with some guy showing off his repertoire of movements. The only thing here being remotely different is the aspect of lighting with Bruce Le being illustrated fairly vibrantly in a red coat of light in front of a pitch black background (you gotta dig the contrast) then we get taken to some scenic agricultural setting where Bruce is training (with some of the most over the top sound effects ever heard).

Next we see Le trying to survive in the wilderness by hunting for fish and using darts to snatch melons from trees. We then come across his martial arts master in ancient garb and we get the impression this is some period tale but then afterwards we get taken to a scenario with thugs in contemporary attire. In any other movie, this would have been seen as defying audience expectation (since it is common for Chinese people to wear ancient robes in a modern setting e.g. the Waise Lee movie The Cat*****). In this movie, it’s just an example of the filmmakers deciding to make up things as they went along.

Le’s character is questionable morally as when the thugs attempt to rape a woman, he doesn’t do anything until they accidentally kick his pot of cooked fish. There’s nothing wrong with having protagonists whose agendas are with shades of gray (like Eastwood’s in the Dollars trilogy) but there doesn’t seem to be many plot points which allow for these filmmakers to explore the possibility of having a morally ambiguous “hero” (either that or they decided to drop the act after failing to come up with more angles on this). Once more, the would-be rape victim tries to kill Le moments later!

After foiling an ambush attempt by some random goons, Le encounters a mysterious martial arts expert played by Cheung Lik (who played the nunchaku exponent in Enter the Game of Death). Cheung was the fight choreographer for both this and Enter the Game of Death. The problem with this film is that during the group conflicts, it’s more obvious than ever that the stuntmen are just waiting to get hit than to be giving the impression that they’re that involved in the fight.

Throughout a lot of these fights, they come off as referees overlooking the action before anticipating in the combat. The filmmakers of this could have learned a lot from Last Fist of Fury from the composition of similar-themed fights. Despite this, both movies share scenes involving one of the protagonists being entangled in rope during a melee.

Some of the humour in the feudage helps to give the film an endearing touch even if some of it is quite hokey (if not ho-hum), namely when one of the gang leaders punishes a fellow hooligan by pulling out some of his facial hair.

Bruce Le’s vest, in some scenes, reads Saplot which is also the name of a feature-length presentation sex drama. Which reminds me, King Boxer 2 could have done with some nudity and porn. Given the randomness of the movie, the producers really missed out on going full-tilt with the exploit-everything angle. Nothing beats a good ol’ fuck and fight flick.

The actress who plays the villainess is Lita Vasquez who was thought of as the Philippines’ answer to Angela Mao. Lita can be seen in the Filipino cult classic Darna and the Planet Women.

The scene with the miniscule tribemen was, no doubt, inspired by the popularity of Weng Weng whose major claim to fame was the Bond spoof For Y’ur Height Only******. Weng had fought Lita in The Impossible Kid which was released one year after For Y’ur Height Only.

Yukari Oshima would be the next big female action superstar for Filipino audiences, although her status is surpassed by actress Vilma Santos who is seen as the Filipino Meryl Streep (conversely yet curiously, Cynthia Rothrock’s popularity in Jakarta was such that she was, oddly enough, viewed as a martial arts Meryl Streep).

No Bruceploitation movie could be complete without the requisite humour, even if a lot of it is unintentional (save for a Filipino equivalent to the type of Waylon Smithers-esque role usually reserved for Lee movie expat Wei Ping Ao). A sign on the door of a sauna (for men) reads ‘keep smiling’ (eerily unsettling given the nudity on display). One of the female protagonists informs Le that one of the crooks is as big as an elephant and when Le is at an amusement park, the director attempts to make the statues of creatures look scary but this would only work in a film like Jurassic Park. Here, it comes off as tawdry.

Rape scenes are never intended to be funny (unless you’re Wong Jing) but in this movie some Filipino thugs try to steal this fat guy’s big bowl of white cream (innuendo unintended) and one of them tries to undress him, causing the chubby guy to moan like a puppy dog as he yearns for his food. If Wong Jing was behind the camera (and left to his devices) this would be on par with his scripted James Ho movie, The Lama Avenger (o.k.a.******* The Three Avengers) which, believe it or not, isn’t as tacky as one may think.

A “poignant” scene takes place nine tenths into the film but rather than being tear-jerking, we’re succumbed to laughter as we see Bruce Le became Bruce Banner. Heheheheheheheheheh!

The brawls presented are literally a case of hit and miss but one fight that’s likely to excite viewers is what should have been the true denouement given the limited skills of Lita and the element of suspense that the film was trying to generate with the mysterious Chinese fighter.

The martial joust illustrates what we’re missing in the other fights: a sense of urgency and a feeling of danger. Mr. Lucas once said that a film is only as good as its villain and throughout the majority of this movie we never get the impression that Le is closer to the threshold of death. This is only hinted at with the premise of each fight rather than explored to devastating effect.

Le is engaged in a fast-paced battle of wits involving having to constantly change his style to jinx the concentration of the hired killer. Le and Lik constantly utilize different styles of Kung Fu, back and forth, in a way that makes other Kung Fu films look stilted and formal in their progression of styles. Le uses an assortment of leopard, dragon’s tail, snake, crane and tiger techniques to combat whatever Lik throws at him. There are parts where they even have to engage in the more conventional fisted combat just to gain an advantage. Lee would be impressed.

Describing the structure on a basic chronological format is fairly daunting, let alone describing the way they employ their techniques. Simply put, the duel serves as a master class seminar in how to counteract the other duelist’s style. It would have been the icing on the cake to have had some mantis and eagle (thumb, index and middle fingers) stylings going on. Having some monkey and panther-fist (middle knuckle raised) shenanigans would have been the cherry on top.

The unconventional conclusion of this bout may have motivated the development for the one between Jackie Chan and Don Cheadle in Rush Hour 2. The music even sounds similar but then that’s probably just me.

The finale is pretty exciting for what it is in theme although it’s kinda uneven in that the very final fight scene doesn’t live up to what preceded it: a series of progressively enthralling fight sequences. We have Karatekas with blades, Karatekas with poles and some Escrima exponents thrown in for good measure. To be honest, Le fought so many people that I think I may have left out something.

Now, if we had Dan Inosanto leading a pack of Escrima-styled cronies against Le then this could have rivaled James Ho’s Chinese Stuntman or even Bruce Lee’s Game of Death for that matter. As is the case here, the premise for the third act never really delivers in a way it should, making the likes of Enter the Game of Death look like Tower of Death. Which is all the more insulting to all concerned when you consider that Enter the Game made New Game of Death look like the original Game of Death.

I wonder how big this film would have performed at the Filipino box office had Weng and Dan appeared in it. Perhaps, Dan was offered to join but was weary of Le and Weng may not have been content at doing a cameo as a Filipino Ewok (he still could have played Agent 00 gunning down would-be gunners attempting to foil Le’s path to obtain justice).

Some gaffes can’t be ignored though. For instance, there are two topless guys who are waiting to pounce on Le in some hotel lobby but the receptionist only notices them when they start fighting (bearing in mind that one of them is standing very near her). Le hits a guy’s thigh but the guy reacts like his extended mushroom and bag of prunes (*cough* *cough* *nudge* *nudge* *wink* *wink*) have been tremendously whalloped.

Some of the kicks don’t look effective since they obviously miss their intended target. Even if people don’t want to get hit, there are ways of obscuring these things with camera positioning but thankfully this never becomes too frequent.

When Le defends himself against the masseuse, she actually smiles after she gets hit. This is an inadvertent example of someone reverting from sadism to masochism. Add a few more techniques at the proverbial hands of Le (as well as some suggestive grimaces) and the term sadomasochism would spring to mind too. The director is prone to some bizarre moments of creativity so maybe Le should have fist-fucked her too.

The villainess of the piece tries to invite Le for a swim but even in the shallow end of the beach she struggles. Despite having reasons to distrust her, he helps her anyway only to be attacked then later on he kisses her like as if the whole thing was just a game of hard to get. When Le fights the first wave of Karatekas, they scatter away for some reason (leaving another group to get wiped out) and then they come back again. It’s like the director had suddenly found a way to extend the finale mid-production.

A good example of the lousy film-making apparent is that in one shot we can see the reflections of the film crew in Le’s shades. Thankfully, we don’t get too many shots like this otherwise this film would be plagued in its attempts to take the viewers to a world that seems to exist outside a filmic environment.

This film is so flawed that it makes Last Fist of Fury look like the work of Akira Kurosawa. Yeah, it’s that bad. Writing and directing mean nothing if the lead actor is not capable. Bruce Le, at best, is an average actor who manages to make the minimalistic Chuck Norris look like a subtle method actor. At worst, Le is a bad actor who can convince movie goers that Michael Wong can evoke the presence and mood of Anthony Wong.

Seriously, Le lacks the expressionistic texture that separates good actors from bad actors. Given the animated nature of some of the other talents Kung Fu cinema had to offer, Le can not hold one’s attention when he’s not in action. Le exhibits little of the charisma and charm Li effortlessly conveyed. He also makes Dragon Lee look like Jason Scott Lee.

Like what Michael Caine said, an actor is always thinking if not talking. Unlike James, we don’t get to see much introspection from Le. Maybe it’s the lack of opportunity to explore facets of emotion but Le is as one dimensional as they come. If Ho was in this movie, this would have been an above average feature if not an entirely good one (like the offbea Bruce Li in New Guinea – also directed by Joey Kong). As it stands, this is quite a bad film with redeeming qualities that stop it from being deemed as terrible.

In spite of this, I feel reluctant in calling this a terrible film since it would be an insult to those who’ve seen worse films. This film, whilst not being consistent, is at least unpredictable and manages to deviate from an unbearably slow pace considering its script seems to have been improvised on set. There are some nice scenic locales too.

Even if the film was without merit, watching bad movies can be good so as to help you be aware of what it means to make a good film and certainly watching terrible movies can make you more aware of the overall standards.

On the whole, this film is worth checking out if you’re looking for a film that’s out of this world. It’s not the worst Bruceploitation movie but nowhere near the best, not by a long shot.

The UK DVD, courtesy of 23rd Century, is missing a good part of the Filipino samurai segment where Le gets cut and uses the nunchaku to bring down the Karatekas. The French title for this film is Le Vainqueur which means The Winner.

Joseph Kong Hong’s filmography probably makes Lo Wei look like Chang Cheh but he’s not without his credentials. Yuen Woo Ping’s second job as stunt coordinator was for Joseph’s directorial debut Tough Guy (starring Chan Sing, Fung Hak On and Mars). Ping would go on to work with Joey on Tiger Force (starring Michael Chan Wai Man, Chan Sing and Jimmy Lee Fong). His last effort with Lo Lieh was The Furious (not to be confused with the Dragon Lee movie of the same name).

His last directorial credits were Thundering Ninja and Out of Danger. Joe’s last movie (as producer) was Black Spot, a film which would motivate the team responsible for Police Story 3: Supercop to pull ideas from it (in story and action). To speak of the devil, Jackie also reinvented the playground fight from New Game of Death for Police Story 2.

As much as Chan criticizes the Bruceploitation (or Bruce-spoof) franchise, it obviously left him an impression (intentionally or subconsciously) to the point of lifting the bus fight gag from Golden Sun (a.k.a. Bruce Lee, We Miss You) for the first Police Story. Criticize he may, Jackie can’t deny the importance these JKD rip-offs had.

Call them purid, full-length presentation, comedy sketch-shows or trash-taste crap-fests but if it weren’t for the Bruceploitation sub-genre, Hong Kong action cinema would have not maintained the popularity it did in the West. It helped bridged the gap between Lee and Chan in terms of sheer commercial momentum.

Many would like to think that these films failed in Hong Kong but if they were well and truly turds that stank up theaters, the local filmmakers wouldn’t have felt inclined to make dozens of them. Exploitation cinema doesn’t get more exploitive than capitalizing on people wanting to see their deceased hero. Critically abysmal? Yes. Commercially dismal? No.

At the end of the day, if you wanna watch a Filipino Bruceploitation actioner that delivers and doesn’t disappoint then check out Chaku Master which stars Bruce Ly (he sort of looks like a Filipino Ngai Sing/Collin Chou). One example of classic humour from that film is the uncanny usage of symbolism during an oral sex sequence. Coincidentally, both flicks offer some of the same locations such as the female villain’s Manilla villa. Heck, Le’s appearance in the Bollywood action flick Katilon Ke Katil, starring Dharmendra, is worth watching than this.

In retrospect of how his career turned out, Bruce Le should have concentrated on making either American or Hong Kong movies than working in the Philippines which is seen as the hell to Hong Kong TV’s purgatory for action movie stars.

After making this movie, Bruce Le worked on the fight scenes for a Chansploitation film called Fearless Hyena 3 starring Jacky Chen Shao Lung (which had Bolo Yeung). Bruce would then be choreographed in a film called Treasure Hunters by no other than Bill Yuen Biao (this shouldn’t be confused with the Wong Jing scripted Shaw Bros. movie which starred Al’ Fu Sheng, Wang Lung Wei, Gordon Liu, Lau Kar Wing and Wilson Tong).

With hindsight, this film seemed to inspire Sammo Hung for some of the comedies he made with Jackie Chan and Yuen Biao. If you were to watch this flick followed by Twinkle Twinkle Lucky Stars and Winners and Sinners, you’ll see how he incorporated certain elements into better movies. It’s a shame no one started up a Hungsploitation genre, get some Japanese fella and rename Sumo Hung. Hey, even Nora Miao had an imitator – Cora Miao. Hong Kong favourite Cheung Hok Yau was named after Jackie.

The gag of having an action sequence take place at a gambling horse den seems to have influenced Joe Cheung for the finale of Flaming Brothers (with firepower replacing fist- and feeticuffs).

You know, for a critically maligned sub-genre, Bruceploitation offerings have had a fair amount of influence. New Game of Death motivated John Woo with using freeze-frame techniques to emphasize dynamic parts of his films and Storming Attacks (Image of Bruce Lee) was given a sly nod by Wong Jing for his overlooked 1989 action comedy classic, Crocodile Hunter (starring Andy Lau). Then there is the correlation that occurs between The Dragon Lives and Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story along with others.

As for Filipino cinema, it should at least be noted for making a name out of this particular Hong Kong movie star.

* How Lieh avoided the label “Lo budget Lieh” is anyone’s guess since his willingness to appear in tacky dreck (like Fist of Fury 2) almost tarnished his respectable reputation.

** Not to be confused with the Dragon Lee movie of the same title which was alternatively titled Dragon Bruce Lee 2.

*** Usually referred to as WIP.

**** Like the American cartoon, Ed, Edd and Eddy, it would have been canny to have had a production with Koo, Kuo and Kong. Joseph Koo being a film score composer as avid Bruce Lee fans would attest.

***** Which boasts one of the greatest fight scenes ever depicted on film…between a mutt and a feline, it has to be seen to be believed (the action director was Philip Kwok a.k.a. Kuo Chui who also appears in the film).

****** Otherwise known as.

******* Peculiarly, James Ho had done a film prior to Weng’s cult classic which had him up against Oddjob and a mini-me variation of him.

Joseph Kuby’s Rating: 5.5/10

Posted in Bruceploitation, Chinese, Filipino, Reviews | Tagged , , |

Better Tomorrow, A III: Love and Death in Saigon (1989) Review

"A Better Tomorrow III" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“A Better Tomorrow III” Japanese Theatrical Poster

AKA: A Better Tomorrow 3
Director: Tsui Hark
Producer: Tsui Hark
Cast: Chow Yun Fat, Tony Leung Ka Fai, Anita Mui Yim Fong, Sek Kin, Nam Yin, Maggie Cheung Ho Yee, Saburo Tokito, Andrew Kam, Wong Chi Wai
Running Time: 125 min.

By Joseph Kuby

Aplomb-filled Saga!

A Better Tomorrow 3 is a prequel to the first film. It’s set in war-torn Vietnam and was directed by Tsui Hark.

Despite not being as excellent as it should have been, it’s still underrated and undervalued by fans & critics for being very different to Woo’s films. It’s not a bad film, it’s a very good one but just one that doesn’t live up to Tsui’s brilliance as a director (what can be said about Tsui as a director can be said about Chow as an actor i.e. what may be a lesser-than-usual outing from him is still better than the average director).

Watching Tsui Hark’s movie back to back with John Woo’s Bullet in the Head is like listening to Metallica’s Kill ’em All album back to back with Megadeth’s Killing in my Business…and Business is Good! in that it’s very easy to perceive the same ideas done differently. As much as Tsui is the Chinese Spielberg, it’s Woo’s on take of the Heroic Bloodshed-in-Vietnam story that is the Spielberg-quality masterpiece, leaving Tsui’s movie (by comparison) nothing more than the Missing in Actions with better plotting and acting.

This prequel has its moments (e.g. Tsui Hark’s famous references towards time, a memorable soundtrack, etc.) and is good enough to be classified as a cinematically worthy follow-up to the other two films (and certainly better than most reactions from fans would have you believe) but I wish Tsui Hark could have focused on the relationship between the characters that we come to know and love in the first two films (especially as a way to make up for the previous installments’ deleted scenes unless maybe Tsui sensed that he’d be able to release the uncut versions of the first two films one day).

There really isn’t that much of a connection between this and the other A Better Tomorrows (besides this REALLY cool scene where Chow and Tony Leung Kar Fai step off this plane with the dark melody from the first film’s restaurant scene playing in the background). It might as well be a different film altogether. They should have just used the subtitle as the main title for the film. Ironically, it was by using a famous title that meant that people went in with wrong expectations and ended up getting disappointed although it still made more money than Bullet in the Head.

That doesn’t mean to say that the film fared any better critically. Many complained that Anita Mui teaching Chow how to fire guns was like Madonna teaching Bruce Willis to fire guns in a Die Hard prequel set in Vietnam where she plays a French femme fatale (which makes sense given the French occupation of Vietnam at the time of the war). One has to understand that Anita wasn’t established as an action icon at that time, as she would later be with Moon Warriors, The Heroic Trio and My Father is a Hero.

As it is, A Better Tomorrow III: Love and Death in Saigon comes off as an exploitative movie. Not merely on an action level but it feels like Tsui Hark used the A Better Tomorrow title just to make his own heroic bloodshed movie and to give his own take on the genre much commercial value. It was like as if he was trying to show Woo (and everyone else) who was the better director not just for the series but in general.

This addition to the series feels like Tsui merely used the name to craft not only his take on the genre, but to craft his own personal take on the Vietnam war and the things that happen in times of war. Perhaps if this was done by John Woo, the action would have been better as well as a better story told. Woo would eventually do his own take on the much planned A Better Tomorrow prequel though one that was heavily rewritten – this was the masterpiece Bullet in the Head, which is really Citizen Kane in comparison to this picture (funnily enough the cinematographer who worked on A Better Tomorrow III was the same as the one used in Bullet in the Head).

Even when taking this all into account, it beats watching the Rambo and Missing in Action films. Despite this being a film made on a smaller budget than those films, the action is far more watchable with plenty of rewind moments and memorable inclusions. The acting is suitably low-key and the action is over the top (particularly the finale involving machine guns, a tank and a motorbike). If this was done by any other director (besides Woo), it would have been seen as a better film but it’s just that coming from Tsui, expectations were meant to be reached and surpassed, something that he never really does with this film.

Be sure to check out the Taiwanese version of the film which is the full uncut version.

Joseph Kuby’s Rating: 7.5/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , |

Better Tomorrow II, A (1987) Review

"A Better Tomorrow II" Korean Theatrical Poster

“A Better Tomorrow II” Korean Theatrical Poster

Director: John Woo
Producer: Tsui Hark
Cast: Chow Yun-Fat, Ti Lung, Leslie Cheung, Dean Shek, Emily Chu, Kenneth Tsang, Regina Kent, Kwan San, Chindy Lau, Dean Harrington, Mark King
Running Time: 103 min.

By Joseph Kuby

Awesomely Ace Addition!

A lot of people hate this movie, like as if Wong Jing had bought the rights to the series and messed things up. To be honest, I think the problems that lie in the film don’t result from the actual quality of the film but from the way it was edited. When you cut any film, there’s bound to be pivotal things missing but when you have a film where not one editor has any idea what the other is doing then the situation ends up looking like a bunch of screenwriters writing sections of a film without any one’s knowledge or consent (likewise if the same thing happened with a team of directors).

This film was originally over three hours in length and the studio balked at Woo for its length. The film was then cut down to two hours and forty minutes so John Woo & Tsui Hark (the producer) had to cut the film separately under a very limited period of time due to pressure from the studio and distributors to trim the film down to get more screenings in cinemas. Therefore, the film had suffered terribly causing Woo to disown it.

The problem is that Woo was given a very short time to edit the film and to make matters worse both Woo & producer Tsui Hark had clashed as to how the film should be made so with Tsui being the producer, he had equal control with the editing of this film along with three others (Woo being the fifth editor). Woo didn’t even know who was editing what. Needless to say, the editing makes the film incoherent, incomprehensible, inconsistent, inane and insane (not to mention irresolute); which is really a shame as if it was left uncut, it could have been a classic.

At best, the recent/regular version is a cult classic but even in its hideously disfigured form, the film still has shades of bravado even if those shades are merely shadows of its former brilliant self.

The second time I saw this film, I compiled a list of scenes that were cut (i.e. scenes that looked like they were abridged…even frames of a single shot) and it’s really obvious that a lot of scenes were cut.

The catchy music cues from 52 Pick-Up are inspired and really help to elevate the excitement and adrenaline rush (particularly during a prolonged shootout/car chase in the streets of daytime New York).

Besides having one of the most bloodiest shootouts ever shot on film, it also has one of the best set-ups/double crosses I’ve ever witnessed on celluloid.

It helps that Chow Yun Fat’s usage of a shotgun rivals that of any film (minus Woo’s others) featuring the handling of a similar weapon, whether it be Bronson’s in Mr. Majestic or Arnie’s in Terminator 2, but with Woo as the director even Sam Peckinpah’s work comes off as overrated.

People usually ignore or don’t realize the themes which are at work here; besides the usual symbolism and metaphors, the film develops John Woo’s themes of religion with Chow’s character being resurrected in the form of a twin brother called Ken (think of Jesus Christ resurrecting before going back into heaven and you’ll see amazing parallels with Ken – especially given one of the final lines of dialogue that’s uttered in the film “We are dying. Can we leave?”).

Another thing which is overlooked in the sequel is John Woo’s insidious sense of humour (he used to make comedies before going into action movies), especially here in the form of self-deprecating humour (which can also be found in his film Just Heroes which makes references to this film) thus making A Better Tomorrow 2 a semi-parody of the first film.

Also the sequel shows Woo’s ingenious strokes of irony: Dean Shek’s character Lung is a godfather to Ken – making Ken a younger disciple/underling but when the former becomes shell-shocked, the latter ends up being the father to the childish former. However, it’s when Ken is in peril that Lung jumps back into reality to take on the foes who have threatened his life and one of his “sons”.

Both John Woo’s sense of irony (usually with his trademark juxtaposition sequences) and religion is pushed to the fore as we see the death scene of Leslie Cheung played out alongside the birth of his son thus making way to the Buddhist belief of being reincarnated. Henceforth John Woo contrasts two different ideologies of what happens after when you die.

The addition of comedy was a welcome touch to this film and just seeing Chow (whose character should have been called Ben or even Kenny* to reduce the confusion with another character called Ken), Leslie, Ti, Kenneth Tsang and Dean Shek side by side in the same scene (and shot) really gave it that special event feeling and thus increasing the momentum & fun factor of the story – leading to the build-up of a horrific yet kind of hilarious showdown.

Considering the usage of irony in this film, it’s ironic that Ng Man Tat gives a villainous performance which barely foreshadows his comic genius in his Stephen Chow outings (his comedic sidekick had appeared in Woo’s Just Heroes).

A Better Tomorrow 2 is like Kill Bill in a way in that, besides the gory showdown (which inspired Tarantino for part one of Kill Bill), there are many references to other films – some more subtle than others. The killer with the white gloves is a nice throw-back to Le Samourai, whilst also a foreshadowing to The Killer (a Chinese remake of Le Samourai). The “black suits with skinny ties” look that the heroes adopt near the end was inspired by Le Samourai.

The scene where Leslie faces off against the hitman (with intercutting shots of his pregnant wife in hospital giving birth) was no doubt taken from the Spaghetti western, Keoma. The shot where Lung is sprayed in the face with a hose by a little girl is inspired by one of the first short films ever created, the Lumiere brothers’ Watering the Gardener (a.k.a. The Sprinkler Spinkled).

The shootout in the apartment was inspired by two Paul Schrader-scripted movies: Taxi Driver and Rolling Thunder (two movies adored by Quentin – which could explain why he likes A Better Tomorrow 2 so much to the point of influence).

The very structural concept of the action sequence (environmentally as well as cinematographically) is similar to the finale of Taxi Driver but Woo has said to have been even more inspired by Rolling Thunder with Chow sporting a shotgun ala Tommy Lee Jones (Chow is even similarly dressed as Tommy) but even with the concept of two psychologically worn-out characters (one physically able than the other) taking on an overwhelming amount of thugs as they descend a building.

A Better Tomorrow 2 not only inspired the dual gun action and looks of the Reservoir Dogs characters (although the look initially came from Le Samourai), but even the crazy dialogues which Tarantino is infamous for as seen & noted in the rice scene where Chow force-feeds an Italian New York-based mafioso to devour rice (the humourous black cop was a wonderful addition as well as Chow’s comic touches – which is saying something as I was really just expecting it to be more of a serious scene with brief touches of darker than dark/blacker than bleak humour). I think even the ending influenced Tarantino’s for his directorial debut although the ending for Ringo Lam’s City On Fire (the main inspiration for Reservoir Dogs) equally holds that honour as well!

This is just proof that Woo is capable of inspiring people through words besides actions. Though speaking of actions, not only did Woo inspire himself for the sliding-down-a-staircase-with-dual guns for his action masterpiece Hard Boiled but even Keenen Ivory Wayans decided to follow suit for his film A Low Down Dirty Shame.

Is this film action-packed? Well, the film is certainly not action-lacked as there’s thirteen action sequences as opposed to the five in A Better Tomorrow, so the action-packed pace of the sequel should appeal more to action movie fans than the first one.

Fun, funny, frenetic, fast-paced, feverish, fervent and utterly & ultimately furious……what more could you possibly want?! Overall a great follow-up to a classic film!

Just one more thing, it’s funny how people refer to the finale as running for twenty minutes because, after calculating the length (starting with the funeral, which in itself is like the introduction to the finale), it’s only twelve minutes long.

* Like his South Park counterpart, Chow’s resurrection from death but to succumb to death is gratuitous but funny. In all due fairness, I think the character of Ken was Woo’s way of saying that Mark had been resurrected (metaphorically speaking) because of his selfless heroism in the first movie. So even if the coherency isn’t as consistent, certainly Woo’s Catholicism is.

Joseph Kuby’s Rating: 9/10


By Numskull

Holy crap, did this series go downhill in a hurry. I suppose it’s comforting, in an odd sort of way, to know that Hollywood isn’t the only film industry that shamelessly milks its cash cows. A Better Tomorrow 2, while not a thoroughly crappy film in and of itself, is a pretty crappy sequel (to a movie that should never have had a sequel to begin with).

The original cast is reunited, with Chow Yun-fat playing the twin brother of his previous character, who got perforated at the end of the first film. Pretty lame way to bring an actor back for round two, but it could have been worse…they could have said that he was critically injured but not killed (“Yes, all 57 bullets missed Mark’s major organs”), that he was only killed in a dream or hallucination of some kind (“Yes, both of you were unwittingly inhaling turpentine fumes during that shootout and Mark actually made his getaway on the boat as planned”), or that he was brought back from the dead somehow (“Yes, Mark is, in fact, Jesus Christ reincarnated…surely you didn’t think he was merely speaking figuratively when he said ‘I’m the God’?”).

The stupidity doesn’t stop there. This time, Chow Yun-fat’s character is named Ken.

“Wait a minute, Numskull…wasn’t Ken the name of the guy who ran the taxi service in the first movie?”

Right you are! And that character is back this time ’round, as well. So what do they do to avoid confusion? They simply refrain from having anyone call the cab guy by name. You see, they just HAD to have two characters named Ken. Who are you to question why?

There’s a new face in the crowd here, Dean Shek, and his character is so pathetic you’ll want to thrust your hand through the TV screen and bitch-slap him on more than one occasion. He loses it when he sees a buddy get popped and spends 45 minutes or so acting like a brain-dead mental patient who has just consumed a prodigious quantity of jewelry polish. If John Woo intended us to feel sorry for him, he failed.

Plenty more stupidity to discuss before all is said and done. Most noticeable among the plot holes is Chow Yun-fat informing Dean Shek that “Peggy is dead.” Those with a keen eye for continuity will note that CYF’s character never witnesses Peggy’s death, nor is he informed of it by anyone else. But somehow, he just knows. Go figure.

In another scene, Ti Lung has to plug Leslie Cheung not once but TWICE (!!!) in order to keep his cover. Now, see, here’s the thing that bugs me…if you’ve got this guy who you know is a cop, and you’re a gangster with about 30 heavily armed henchman, and you have one of them shoot the cop a couple of times, don’t you think you should…oh, I don’t know…MAKE SURE HE’S DEAD before you drive away?!? Not these guys…they don’t check for a pulse or anything of the sort. Bang, bang, and then they pile into their cars and take off. Whataloadacrap.

The first scene in the Four Seas Restaurant is one of the stupidest things I’ve ever seen. Some fuckwad white guy loudly announces that he’s going to blow the place up because their fuckin’ food stinks. Bravo. Ken then makes him apologize to the rice. In the Cantonese DVD track, this scene has English dialogue. This part of the movie is so fucking lame, I can actually picture some red-hot chick with a scorching case of nymphomania bursting into the viewer’s room, absolutely determined to have sex with him despite not knowing him, then seeing what a fucking stupid scene he’s watching in this weird Chinese movie, and having second thoughts about the whole thing and going elsewhere in search of a frozen hot dog or something like that, all because this scene is so painfully, miserably, abominably sucky.

Most of the movie’s flaws are in the first two-thirds, and after Dean Shek’s character gets his shit together, the film partially redeems itself. The scene where Tse Kit calls his wife in the hospital is probably the best dramatic scene (most of the others being too limp to elicit any noteworthy emotional response from the audience), and the climactic action sequence is a pretty good one, although it requires a sizable suspension of disbelief (the good guys each get shot like seven times, and all it seems to do is stain their clothes red and make them a little sleepy).

Sorry Mr. Woo, but this movie was a waste of talent, both yours and those of the cast. Anyone who saw the first A Better Tomorrow and loved it, don’t think for a minute that you are somehow obligated to watch the sequel too. Its rightful place is in the shadow of its predecessor.

Numskull’s Rating: 5/10


By Alexander

Thank goodness I watched “Hardboiled” and “A Bullet in the Head” before picking up the absurdly over-the-top “A Better Tomorrow 2.” While each of those Woo/Yun-Fat classics are fairly evenly paced and reward the viewer with frequent scenes of mayhem, “ABT 2” weakly lurches forward to a barely satisfying grenade-tossing, blood-soaked finale. (I’m convinced the chapter search function on DVD players was invented solely for this film.)

The most distracting thing about this film isn’t the ridiculous plot, but rather how dated it looks. The Flock of Seagull haircuts, bandanas, and tight-ass George Michaelesque jeans all scream 1980s. Part of the appeal of “The Killer,” “Hardboiled,” and even “ABT” is their timelessness. With a few exceptions, these films — and other greats like a “A Hero Never Dies” and anything by Wong Kar Wai — don’t FEEL like they belong to any one decade and hold up well to repeated viewings.

Alexander’s Rating: 6/10


By Yates

This film is really great in some aspects and really bad in others. It is great in that it has amazing action and a couple of really great scenes (the rice scene, the final 20 minutes). Of course, as anyone who has seen it knows, it had nothing on ABT. The script is filled with laughable contrivances and numerous plot holes (most likely due to John Woo and Tsui Hark’s arguments over the editing), the middle part where Dean Shek goes insane is a bit tedious, and for the love of Christ: Ken??!??!? I mean, come on! A superior heroic bloodshed, but not a superior entry in the ABT trilogy.

Yates’ Rating: 8.5/10


By James H.

“A Better Tomorrow II” is a sequel in the true Hollywood sense. Its purpose is to cash in on the success of its predecessor. Made only one year after the groundbreaking, and record-breaking original, it reunites the cast, even though Chow Yun-Fat’s character died in the first. However, ABT 2 doesn’t fall flat like several sequels do. Woo takes what he learned from the first film and builds on that framework. The action is bigger, better and slicker. Gun shots a louder, shotgun wounds are bloodier, the body count is higher. Although this may seem all well and good, the story suffers from it. I’m sure you all know by now that Chow Yun-Fat plays the twin brother of his character from the original film. And now Chow is the centre of attention, whereas in the first film, he was a secondary character.

This movie is not about story though. It is about the action. The action in this film is mind-blowing, although not as good as Woo’s later works like “The Killer” and “Hard-Boiled”. There are a few scenes that are indeed worthy of high praise. However, with the bigger action comes the ridiculousness. The climax of the film is so full of excess it becomes preposterous, and one cannot help but snicker. Yes, it is a good movie. It is good, violent, fun. And yes, it does how Chow Yun-Fat. But it does not live up to other works by Woo.

James H’s Rating: 7.5/10


Posted in Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Better Tomorrow, A (1986) Review

"A Better Tomorrow" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“A Better Tomorrow” Japanese Theatrical Poster

Director: John Woo
Producer: Tsui Hark
Cast: Chow Yun-Fat, Ti Lung, Leslie Cheung, Waise Lee, Emily Chu, Kenneth Tsang, Shek Yin-Chi, Tien Feng, Kam Hing-Yin, Wong Hap, John Woo, Shing Fui-On
Running Time: 95 min.

By Joseph Kuby

Definitely worth the hype!

This film is slightly melodramatic (due to Chow Yun Fat but more particularly Leslie Cheung) though the film has a strong emotional undercurrent running through it which beats not only John Woo’s U.S. work but most dramatic films in general.

For those who like low-key and subtlely played yet heart-felt performances, I’d say that Ti Lung’s is the best in the film. Ti’s performance as a man caught up in a dilemma is fascinating whereas Leslie overdoes some of it, with Chow lingering somewhere in between being subtle and histrionic.

The action is groundbreaking for the time although somewhat rigid as it was John’s second contemporary action film (besides martial arts i.e. guns, pyrotechnics and car chases) so it doesn’t compete with his later works (which is why the action scenes in Schwarzeneggar’s Raw Deal* {released if not completely made in the same year as A Better Tomorrow} is on par with this, which is funny given the common perception that Hong Kong action films are superior to anything put out by anywhere else, films like Raw Deal and Drive prove likewise). Yet, the originality and style of the restaurant shootout is what makes up for the loose nature of the gun battles that precede and follow it.

Beyond the action, what’s important about this film was the way people looked at action movies on a non-action level. People can argue that there was always strong storytelling in action films before Woo came along but it can be argued that Woo helped to maintain and raise those standards with this film.

It’s a shame that the sequels are under-appreciated, which just goes to show you the benchmark standard Woo had raised with this film.

It’s really hard to imagine what would have happened had A Better Tomorrow been about female criminals (Tsui’s original interpretation of the story which is sort of reflected in the third installment).

* What’s interesting is that the director of Raw Deal, John Irvin, seemed to have been influenced by Woo’s movie as Irvin’s 1989 film, Next Of Kin (starring Patrick Swayze and Liam Neeson), was essentially the first American heroic bloodshed movie. It plays like a semi-remake of A Better Tomorrow for those who care to spot the similarities.

Like Woo’s film, it’s an action film with the emphasis on family drama. It’s about the bond between brothers and what happens when that bond is broken, with Patrick’s cop character, Truman, is someone torn in a moral dilemma (ala Woo’s protagonists) between seeking vengeance for a fallen brother and upholding the law.

Tension mounts between Truman and Briar (ala Ti Lung’s Ho and Leslie Cheung’s Kit) after the death of a fallen family member before teaming up as a last resort to combat the mafia (especially with both of them on opposite sides of the law).

Mark wants revenge against his oppressors but wants help just like how Briar needs Truman’s assistance (of course Mark and Briar share the same grim fate).

Truman threatens to arrest Briar if he chooses to break the law to avenge their brother’s death (like how Kit threatens to arrest Ho) and even hits him (like how Kit does with Ho). Just like Kit’s wife, Truman’s wife is a classical musician who plays in concerts.

Funnily enough, just like A Better Tomorrow 2 and Just Heroes, Next Of Kin has the distinction of having a comic actor appearing in an early serious role (i.e. Ben Stiller).

Joseph Kuby’s Rating: 9.5/10


By Numskull

“A Better Tomorrow.” Not just a sappy phrase to indicate hope for a hopeless future. Not just the name of a cool track by Kreator after they matured past their “I’ll rip your flesh and torment your face” (actual song lyrics) phase. Not just the title of a Hong Kong movie…it’s the title of one of the BEST damn Hong Kong movies out there, one which has rightly achieved fame as an “ice breaker” for those just getting into the whole shebang (I refuse to label a film industry running the gamut from action to comedy to drama to horror as a “genre”).

This here be the film that made John Woo and Chow Yun-fat mega-stars and brought Ti Lung out of an alcoholic stupor and into the limelight again. It’s also considered the first and defining film in the “heroic bloodshed” genre (THERE’S that word). Woo’s preceding film, Heroes Shed No Tears, had lotsa guns but was more of a war-based action movie, and a rather sloppy one at that. A Better Tomorrow clearly shows immense maturity as a storyteller on Woo’s part, achieved in a very brief period of time.

Ti Lung skillfully emits a haunted, frustrated mood, Leslie Cheung is so pissy you want to slap him, and Chow Yun-fat’s job is mostly to just look cool. It certainly worked on Quentin Tarantino, who donned trenchcoat and sunglasses to emulate his new hero after seeing this film for the first time and put “Chow Yuen Fat” on the special thanks list for the Reservoir Dogs screenplay…and THEN, several years later, said of CYF in The Replacement Killers: “He sucks bad in that movie.” As if the overwhelming shittiness of the movie itself wasn’t at least partly to blame. Stupid fuckwad.

Anyway…not quite as much action here as in later classics like Hard Boiled, but that ain’t the point. The point is the expertly told (and deceptively simple) story, marred somewhat by poorly translated and ill-timed subtitles, but still plenty enjoyable. Many people have used A Better Tomorrow as a jumping-on point for HK cinema…including, unfortunately, Antoine Fuqua, director of The Replacement Killers, whose astounding incompetence made Chow Yun-fat’s first impression on the general American public a profoundly unpleasant one.

A Better Tomorrow is fast-paced without being rushed, kinetic without being mindless, emotional without being saccharine. Few films deserve their sterling reputations as much as this one does. Gotta love it.

Numskull’s Rating: 9/10


By Dan-O

I, Dan-O, of sound mind and even sounder body ( if anyone wants any beefcake pics of myself that I personally clipped out of Playgirl magazine, from pics that are clearly NOT of me, please e-mail me immediately) promise to all of you loyal readers out there that I will NOT write ANY “dirty words”, “cuss”, or otherwise say weird things, in this here review. I am doing this because it has recently come to my attention that some people out there in Internetville are “offended” by the “curse” words often written by me in my “reviews”. It is for this reason why I choose to censor myself here today. After all, I would like people to have the impression that I could easily communicate a simple and straightforward point of view without having to resort to such base forms of communication as “Guttural Slang”. I will not, for instance, say things like Shit, Shit-face, Fuck, Shit-Fucker, Shit-Face-Fucker, Cocksucker, Motherfuckingcocksukingtwatfacedshitfucker, Dildo, or Robert Clouse is a…(any of the above).

Now on with the show:

Ok, I like this movie, but who cares about that? If you do, ask yourself why you do… see what I mean. Feel silly don’t ya? Uh huh. I thought so.

Fact is, you DON’T really care that I like this movie. You already KNOW this is a good movie, just read all the other reviews…. THEY love it more than they love their own families! They wouldn’t lie, would they? Of course not.

What you REALLY WANT (yet you would NEVER admit to), is for me to rip this movie up one side and down the other, for NO REASON. You want to see this movie eviscerated, gutted, cooked over a high flame, served on one of those cute little revolving plates, all to serve your lowly carnivorous appetites.

Well, guess what. TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAY!!!!!

Congratulations.

This pile of GARBAGE from John Woo starts off with Chow Yun Fat and what appears to be his gay lover licking their lips in a pointless scene so boring that it could only have been written by a hyperactive corpse. Then there’s some guns and shooting, which suck giant huevos. Chow Yun Fat gets shot in the leg, then looks like a pile of crap throughout the rest of this rat-ass film. Then he does some lovely crying, which he does allot in movies, and he happens to quite good at it. What a wussy. ‘Guess all those SOAP OPERA gigs served him well in the crying department. Then were treated to an extra heaping helping of this BLAMBLAMLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM, oh, someone tell Mr. Yun Fat to PLEASE stick that noodle back in his mouth. Stick the noodle… Chow…. the noodle, stick it in your….. are you listening….the noodle, Chow… it’s been dangling there for an hour out of the side of your mouth…. just take your finger, yeah that one… put Mr.Noodle back in the hangar…. theeeeeeere ya go!!! Goooood boy!!

Oh, the ending is awful too, really depressing. Chow Yun Fat dies….Awwwww, did I spoil the movie, did the mean man give away the surprise? Well, next time, to avoid such things, be a doll and WATCH THE STINKING MOVIE before you read a review, jackass.

*The preceding ‘load’ was not an actual review… If indeed you thought that this was an actual review you probably used to ride the short bus to school in the morning. It (the ‘load’) was written because the author is tired of writing normal, sunny, happy, John Q Public kind of reviews and wishes to write something more interesting than “It was awesome!” or “I would rather eat my own crotch than watch this movie again”. He failed, but hey, you got sucked into reading this anyway, so the author has accomplished his task(?) You wiener!

Go back to bed.

By the way, it was good movie. I like movies. This one also. Here’s a smiley for you to have 🙂

Dan-O’s Rating: 7/10


Vic Nguyen

The film that singlehandedly rejuvenated the career of John Woo, and gave Chow Yun-fat another best actor trophy. Shattering all previous box office records, this top grade production features superbly edited action sequences, a stirring theme song, excellent characterization and strong melodrama. One of Woo’s most heralded productions, this film influenced two sequels, countless ripoffs, and even started a brief fashion trend in Hong Kong. Unquestionably one of the most accomplished pieces by the director, this is a production that I cannot recommend enough.

Vic Nguyen’s Rating: 10/10


DJ Nixon

Chow Yun-Fat is my favorite actor in the world; and this movie, along with several others, show why I think this. This film is Chow’s first major break into movies, he even won a HK Oscar for it. The plot is very good and very emotional; Chow Yun-Fat and Ti Lung’s performances are great. The gun fights are great too; although they are not as good as Chow’s later films such as Hard Boiled or The Killer; they are still very well done. I especially loved the brief but very good gun fight where Chow comes into a room and blasts away at about 15 guys with two .45’s (his trademark weapon). He ends up getting shot in the leg two times though, and is crippled for the rest of his life. A awesome movie, whether you like drama’s or hardcore action, this movie is great!

DJ Nixon’s Rating: 10/10


By S!DM

John Woo’s classic melodrama about two troubled brothers. One is a cop who refuses to accept his brother, a criminal who decides to come clean. It plays almost like a soap opera, but with John Woo’s excellent direction and storyline. Tsui Hark produces this modern day hit, one of the milestones of HK cinema. Kit, the cop, his brother Ho (played by Ti Lung), and a guy that is coolness incarnate (Chow Yun Fat), eventually become involved with each other after each has an important event happen in his life. Kit and his wife see his father brutally murdered, Ti Lung’s character is arrested and put in jail, and Mark (Chow Yun Fat) is crippled after he kills an enemy. After these things take place, we see that each character is changed spiritually. Mark is now a lowly window washer and bum, Kit is depressed and refuses to accept his brother, and Ho promises to go clean by leaving a triad, but he finds that it’s not so easy…That’s when all three team up to help each other in an explosive finale.

S!DM’s Rating: 10/10


By James H.

“A Better Tomorrow” marks the beginning of an era. This film singlehandedly rejuvenated John Woo’s failing career. It also boosted supporting actor Chow Yun-Fat to superstar status and, in my opinion, coolest man on Earth. “A Better Tomorrow” had an inspired mix of violence and melodrama not seen since the earlier days of Sam Peckinpah.

The plot concerns a young cop (Cheung), his criminal brother (Lung) and how their paths cross. Things get complicated and bloodbaths ensue. While a very strong story, the screenplay trips up by adding a small amount of comedy in the first act.

It is a very good, and very well made film. But it does have its faults. For instance, the two main actors, Leslie Cheung and Ti Lung, are not necessarily strong actors. Neither of them have the ability or charisma to carry an entire film. Chow, however, saves this film from becoming just another HK action flick. He gives a well developed and believable performance for which he was awarded best actor at the Hong Kong Film Awards.

The action scenes are well done, although not as polished as some of Woo’s later works like “Hard Boiled” and “The Killer”. The shootout at the end is the most memorable, but the one with Chow in the restaurant stands out too.

I have seen both US and HK versions of the film. The HK version runs 95 minutes and has almost illegible subs. The US version runs 89 minutes, and is the most widely available. It features bad dubbing, and is missing a couple of scenes that are not really important to the plot.

James H’s Rating: 8.5/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , |

White Valentine (1999) Review

"White Valentine" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“White Valentine” Japanese Theatrical Poster

Director: Yang Yun-Ho
Cast: Park Sin-Yang, Jeon Ji-Hyeon, Jeon Mu-Song, Kim Se-Jun, Kim Young-Ok, Yang Dong-Keun, Kang Jin-Wu, Jang Myeong-Cheol, Park Mi-Rae
Running Time: 89 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Jung-min (Jeon Ji-Hyeon) is a young woman who drops out of school to pursue her love for “art,” a pastime she wants to make her career. She mysteriously lost her parents when she was very young, and now, lives and works for her grandfather who runs a small book store. When she’s not working, she spends her free time drawing birds and other sceneries at the park.

There’s one only thing she’s missing – a cure for her loneliness. You see, years earlier she was so desolated that she became pen pals with a man that was 10 years older than her. She developed a likeness to the guy so much that she lied about her age and told him she was a school teacher. When the man decided to visit her, she stood him up, only to change her mind the very last minute. By that time, it was too late. As a result, she had lost her pen pal, and her loneliness continued.

One day, while sitting in her bedroom, a pigeon comes flying through her window with a message attached to it…

You know what, screw this.

I’m not going waste my time writing about the plot. Instead, I’ll just attack the hell out of this film. It’s got nothing to do with the writers or the acting. It’s Yang Yun-Ho, the director of this film. He needs to open his eyes. He’s either: 1) Suffering from some type of serious eye stigmatism; 2) Has very bad taste in choosing a certain look for a film; or 3) He’s simply an idiot.

I’ll go for 3.

Look dude, you’re working with Jeon Ji-Hyeon. She’s a fine actress, the camera loves her face. I’d say that’s a damn good reason to film her a little closer, instead of filming her from 10 miles away. While you’re at it, do the same with everyone else.

These are actors and actresses you’re dealing with, not extras. I would have loved to see the expression on Jeon Ji-Hyeon’s face the first time that bird came flying in, but no, she was filmed so far away that all I saw from a distance was her body, her bed, her hamper, her clothes and her dog; I even saw the bakery outside where the two idiots were buying fresh bread.

After awhile, all these faraway shots made me seriously nauseous. I know I sound crude, but if you ever watch this film, you’ll realize how awful the camera work was. If the filmmaker had any common sense, White Valentine could have been a decent film.

Mighty Peking Man: 2/10

Posted in Korean, Reviews | Tagged , |

Windstruck (2004) Review

"Windstruck" Korean Theatrical Poster

“Windstruck” Korean Theatrical Poster

Director: Kwak Jae-yong
Cast: Jeon Ji-hyun, Jang Hyuk, Kim Jung-Tae, Kim Su-Ro, Lee Ki-Woo, Lim Ye-Jin, Cha Tae-Hyun
Running Time: 123 min.

By Owlman

Kyung-Jin (Jeong Ji-Hyun) is a young police officer. She meets Myung-Woo (Jang Hy-Yuk), a schoolteacher, in the most unusual circumstances. They fall in love. Tragedy ensues. Lots of tears and, as a testament to the title of the film, lots and lots of wind. More tears. A couple of suicide attempts by Kyung-Jin. An action scene with a bad guy. A scene of closure to the film that is so cheesy, I thought Whoopi Goldberg and the use of the word “ditto” were going to appear. A final scene that apparently hints towards Windstruck being a prequel to My Sassy Girl – although I wouldn’t know because I’ve never seen MSG.

All of this add up to a bad viewing experience. It’s too bad that movies can’t be put on vinyl because if Windstruck was available in such a format, I would take it right now and smash it over my head.

Owlman’s Rating: 1/10 (only for that scene with Kyung-Jin and the two street kids)


By Iuxion

To date, I’ve watched Windstruck three times, which is a lot, considering that I didn’t like it very much the first time around. Marking the reunion of director Kwak Jae Yong and actress Jeon Ji Hyun, who first worked together in My Sassy Girl, Windstruck is without a doubt, something of a disappointment. While that film managed to go on to become Korea’s best selling DVD (and is currently being remade by Dreamworks, unfortunately, for the US), I doubt any of that will happen for Windstruck, much to the chagrin of Edko Films, the Chinese distributor that partially funded this Korean film in the hopes that the lightning would strike twice. So what went wrong?

The film opens with a shot of Gyeong Jin (Jeon Ji Hyun), moments away from plummeting off the top of one of many skyscrapers in Seoul. We aren’t told what or why, and from here the story flashes back in time to the meeting of Gyeong Jin and Myung Woo (Volcano High’s Jang Hyuk), follows their subsequent romance, and then leads up to the events that started the film off atop the city skyline. Jeon Ji Hyun plays pretty much the same character that she did in My Sassy Girl, and while the first half of the film effectively mimics the structure and style of its popular cousin, the second half strays into heavy-handed melodrama, giving the movie a more soap opera quality. No scenes drag, per se, but many don’t really fit in with the overall feel of the movie and probably should’ve been left on the cutting board. The film’s soundtrack, which is an odd fusion of Korean pop music, classic rock and roll, and orchestra numbers (while not bad on it’s own) is poorly used in some instances, with songs sometimes repeating themselves literally seconds after they were previously played.

This, and more, kind of makes me believe that Mr. Kwak just didn’t know what to do anymore, half-way in: the film in its final form is basically representative of every major cinematic genre (it’s got comedy, romance, action, horror, etc.), but it doesn’t really do anything particularly well and just isn’t that memorable on its own.

Being a huge fan of My Sassy Girl compelled me to pick up this film and give it another chance after being disappointed the first time. I can’t say that it was really a bad decision; while Windstruck is flawed, it definitely has its charm, especially for those who loved that other movie, which I’d recommend seeing first (for the few of you who haven’t checked it out yet), in order to fully enjoy this one. In fact, Windstruck’s connection to My Sassy Girl may be both its greatest strength and greatest weakness: while disappointing in comparison, some of the personality that made My Sassy Girl so original and memorable can be found here as well.

Iuxion’s Rating: 7/10


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Last Samurai, The (2003) Review

"The Last Samurai" American Theatrical Poster

“The Last Samurai” American Theatrical Poster

Director: Edward Zwick
Writer: John Logan, Edward Zwick, Marshall Herskovitz
Cast: Tom Cruise, Ken Watanabe, Billy Connolly, Koyuki, Tony Goldwyn, Seizo Fukomoto, Timothy Spall, Hiroyuki Sanada, Masato Harada, Sosuke Ikematsu, Shin Koyamada, Aoi Minato, Shichinosuke Nakamura, Shun Sugata

Plot: Epic Action Drama. Set in Japan during the 1870s, The Last Samurai tells the story of Capt. Nathan Algren (Tom Cruise), a respected American military officer hired by the Emperor of Japan to train the country’s first army in the art of modern warfare.

As the Emperor attempts to eradicate the ancient Imperial Samurai warriors in preparation for more Westernized and trade-friendly government policies, Algren finds himself unexpectedly impressed and influenced by his encounters with the Samurai, which places him at the center of a struggle between two eras and two worlds, with only his own sense of honor to guide him.

By Numskull

In recognition of Japan’s most well-known contribution to the world of poetry, I now offer a haiku synopsis of The Last Samurai:

This seems familiar.
“Dances with Wolves in Japan”?
Yes. More combat, though.
Hey, that was easy. Quick, too. And accurate. I should do this more often.

Review #300, here I come!

Numskull’s Rating: 7/10

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Blood: The Last Vampire (2009) Review

"Blood: The Last Vampire" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“Blood: The Last Vampire” Japanese Theatrical Poster

Director: Chris Nahon
Cast: Jun Ji Hyun, Koyuki, Michael Byrne, Colin Salmon, Allison Miller, Masiela Lusha, Yasuaki Kurata
Running Time: 89 min.

By Ningen

Saya is a vampire hunter who’s half-vampire herself. Working for the feds, she tracks down her nemesis, Onigen, in Japan. In an attempt to be discrete and blend in, she poses as a schoolgirl on a U.S. airbase situated in that country. However, she ends up partnering with an unlikely ally in the form of a high-school army brat-by the name of Alice-who has the misfortune of being caught in the cross-fire between humans and the undead. [And, in some cases, humans who are just as bad as the undead.]

Gianna Jun’s [Yes, I’m too lazy to spell out her Korean name.] international debut has been a source of speculation for a while. Is she too old for the part of a schoolgirl? Would they screw up her fight scenes with that much-hated “close-up camera”? Could she pull off a believable fight scene, given that she’s not known for action roles? Well, I’m proud to say she passed with flying colors. The movie is another story. But, given that I’m still reeling from the amateur writing, directing, and cutting we got from Speed Racer, and given that I’m ignoring the shoddy production released by a major studio which wouldn’t have passed muster 20 years ago, which got called Dragonball, Blood is a breath of fresh air.

Directed by the guy who gave us [Crackwhore’s] Kiss of the Dragon, Blood doesn’t suffer the same fate of being written by Luc Besson, which means no random hookers with hearts of gold or brawny guys popping up randomly for no reason, along with (bad) rap music blaring in the background. What it does suffer from is some disappointing creature-shop FX and the need to balance two intertwining plots involving Gianna’s character and a girl who looks like Lindsay Lohan’s dumpy younger sister. Oh, and the setting occasionally shifts between “modern” 1970 Japan and feudal Japan. But no biggie.

All one really needs to know is that Saya is going through an identity crisis in which she can’t decide where she falls under-human or vampire. And her C.I.A. agent compadre can’t think of any place for her, after she’s accomplished her mission. Drifting from place to place with her sword, and her jug of blood, her only companions, Saya clearly needs some emotional support, which she gets with the help of her friend, Alice. On the surface, she’s a bookworm, but Alice is a free spirit at heart; and she even steals her dad’s car to hang out at local party spots in town. Unfortunately, the party’s over when she finds out people at her school are actually vampires. Saya cuts ’em up, but blows her own cover in the process. So her only recourse is to lay low for a while. However, the beauracratic in-fighting between Alice’s father-a general-and the CIA agents, turns deadly, and Saya is forced to protect Alice while escaping a back-stabber in her organization. But with Alice’s help, Saya manages to find Onigen’s hide-out where final showdown between old enemies takes place.

As an actress, Jun holds her own, emotionally, and even displays better English ability than her voice-over in the trailer would suggest. As a fighter, I don’t feel she stands out as well; but that’s only because of the overuse of slow-mo and CG blood. The fight scenes are also mostly one-sided, with very little actual sword-play. Still, it’s nice to see some the hits connecting, for once, and not having to deal with the camera pull back or put more emphasis on flipping than actual fighting. I also can actually believe that Jun had some training, since she doesn’t pull off any moves which are hard to believe for her build?. Nor does she act like each fight is a breeze, and come off barely scratched from each encounter. I really appreciate that they didn’t try to make me think otherwise, like they do in other “wire-fu” flicks nowadays.

The supporting cast could use a little more character development, but at least they don’t stand around looking pretty all day. They also look like they’re prepped for action. In addition, the actors are able to avoid falling into the trap of doing one-note performances common to this genre, while keepin the pace of the movie steady. Part of that is due to their wardrobes and hair-styles which actually blend in with the settings. I’ve never seen a recent movie so invested in at least getting the “look” right. So, regardless of how you feel about the final product, Blood should at least win some awards for make-up and fashion, if nothing else.

The monsters could use some work, since they look like leftovers from Raimi’s Evil Dead films and Whedon’s Buffy show. But the actors do try to make me feel like they’re menacing. And that’s what counts. In the end, though, Blood is really a b-horror flick with a pretense of depth.

Ningen’s Rating: 8/10 for set design, gore, and emotional range; 5.5./10 for hoaky creatures of the night; 6/10 for sloppy story; 7/10 for the overall product

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Legacy of Rage | aka Fire Dragon (1986) Review

"Legacy of Rage" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“Legacy of Rage” Japanese Theatrical Poster

Director: Ronnie Yu Yan-Tai
Cast: Brandon Lee, Michael Wong Man-Tak, Michael Chan Wai-Man, Regina Kent, Bolo Yeung, Ng Man-Tat, Mang Hoi, Tanya George, Louis Roth, Stuart Smith
Running Time: 86 min.

By Joe909

You know you’re in for trouble when even the opening theme song is half-assed; it sounds like someone turning on a cheap Casio keyboard and goofing off with a few keys. Probably the most depressing movie I’ve ever seen, Legacy of Rage plods on through its 90 minutes, giving us an 8-year view of the terrible life lead by Brandon Lee’s character, who is named, oddly enough “Brandon.” He’s set up by his best friend ? who also continuously hits on Brandon’s fiancé ? he’s sent to prison, his fiancé moves to Brazil with an older guy, and, even in prison, Brandon has to put up with daily assaults by a gang of gwailo. Luckily, Brandon meets Four-Eyes, who happens to be a gun runner, and upon release from prison, Brandon works a few odd jobs before going all out in his vengeance.

Like A Better Tomorrow Part 2, Legacy of Rage is only notable for its dynamite ending. Bey Logan has it listed in his “Hong Kong Action Cinema” as one of the top heroic bloodshed battles, and it deserves to be listed there. Brandon and Four-Eyes blast apart countless goons in a 15-20 minute orgy of violence. I wouldn’t say that the scene is as good as ABT 2, but it does pack a big wallop, especially after the preceding hour of trite melodrama.

Supposedly Brandon Lee wasn’t very interested in martial arts when he made this movie, in 1986, so that might explain why there are only a few seconds of kung-fu in the film. Even his fight with Bolo Yeung is over before it starts, to quote Bey Logan. But even considering that Brandon didn’t want to do martial arts at the time, that still doesn’t explain why he would agree to such a depressing, dark movie. At least his sister got it right, by debuting in the pure actioner Enter the Eagles.

As it is, I’d just recommend skipping through the movie to the final fight. You don’t need to know the characters, or, worse yet, their plights. Just enjoy the shenanigans and gun fire, and like those guys on SCTV, you can chuckle and say “that blew up real good” when you see things exploding.

On a final note, I first saw this movie around ten years ago in its English-dubbed version. Brandon was dubbed in English throughout by another actor, except for the scenes in prison, where he talks to the gwailo bullies. There Brandon spoke in his own voice, saying short statements like “How do you wanna play?” and “No more.” I believe those scenes were recorded in sync-sound; at least, they sounded like they were. On the HK dvd Cantonese dub, Brandon’s voice is dubbed the whole time, even when he speaks English; the actor doing his voice for the English lines can barely speak the language. I wonder why they didn’t use Brandon’s voice. It isn’t a big deal, though, as the HK dvd’s picture blows away the quality of my old, English dubbed video, which was fullscreen and had Dutch subtitles. Those damn Dutch.

Joe909’s Rating: 4/10

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Crow, The (1994) Review

"The Crow" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“The Crow” Japanese Theatrical Poster

Director: Alex Proyas
Producer: Edward R. Pressman
Cast: Brandon Lee, Ernie Hudson, Michael Wincott, David Patrick Kelly, Angel David, Rochelle Davis, Bai Ling, Laurence Mason, Michael Massee, Bill Raymond, Sofia Shinas, Anna Levine, Tony Todd, Jon Polito
Running Time: 100 min.

By Numskull

The Crow is a movie full of rare things.

It’s rare for a person to get killed during production, especially the lead actor. But, as I’m sure you’re aware, Brandon Lee died of a gunshot wound before filming was complete.

It’s rare for a movie to enjoy mainstream success when it deals rape, drugs, incest, and people having their eyes removed in various ways. But Shelley Winters gets gang-banged, half the characters abuse controlled substances, Michael Wincott makes it perfectly clear that he bones his sister, and people do indeed have their eyes removed in various ways.

It’s rare for a child actor or actress to actually have talent. But, the girl who plays Sarah (I can’t read her name on the credits because they’re so damn blurry, but I think her first name is Angel) succeeds admirably in her role instead of just being a female Macauly Culkin. You might complain that she’s too dead-eyed and automatonlike, but consider this: when was the last time you saw a kid that age get excited about anything without the word “Pokemon” on it?

It’s rare for a movie to have a strong supporting cast of small names. But here we’ve got a very memorable crew of bad guys (especially Skank, the speed freak who feels like a little worm on a big fuckin’ hook) led by the criminally unknown Michael Wincott (also in Strange Days, a personal favorite of mine). Also there’s Ernie Hudson, who is a hell of a lot better as a beat cop than he was as a Ghostbuster.

Sadly, The Crow is also a movie full of common things.

It’s common for a movie to have some crappy actors mixed in with the good ones Alas, there’s the bartender, there’s MIchael Wincott’s bodyguard guy, and there’s the cop who says “I hate this. They can’t even call it ‘cream’ legally.”

It’s common for a movie to have a soundtrack loaded with over-rated, under-talented MTV sweethearts. Alas, you’ll be subjected to agonizing garbage by the likes of Nine Inch Nails (led by Trent Reznor, the man who loves nothing more than to fiddle with a sound mixer and scream about his penis), Stone Temple Pilots (led by Scott Weiland, the man whose shoe size equals the number of times he’s been busted for heroin), and Rage Against The Machine (led by…well, I don’t know any of the members’ names, but they’ve got that “rap with electric guitars” thing going on and I really, really hate that shit).

It’s common for a movie (or a person, for that matter) to misuse the word “anarchy”. Alas, the line “Disorder…chaos…anarchy…now that’s FUN!” was pulled out of someone’s ass The true meaning of anarchy has about as much to do with “disorder” and “chaos” as Marilyn Manson (and thank God HE’S not on the soundtrack) has to do with “wisdom” and “integrity”.

It’s common for a movie to spawn a really bad sequel. Alas, The Crow: City of Angels came into existence and, well…the less said, the better.

Happily, the pros here outweigh the cons.

Mr. Bona doesn’t seem to be too impressed with Brandon Lee’s acting skills. After watching Rapid Fire I would agree, but I really think his performance in The Crow is solid. Unfortunately, computer images were used to fill in for him after he died, so for certain parts, the techies must share in the credit.

That reminds me. How come there wasn’t more of an uproar about HOW Brandon Lee died instead of the simple fact that he DID? I personally don’t think that “tragedy” and “accident” are valid explanations for a real bullet being placed in a gun that was only supposed to be loaded with blanks. Is anyone with me or did I miss something?

Mr. Bona also doesn’t seem to be too impressed with the special effects during the “Look at my hand and watch the bullet hole magically vanish” scene. That, I cannot dispute.

Surely I’m not the only one who read the graphic novel upon which this movie is based. Does anyone else wish they had included the part where Eric Draven uses Funboy’s blood to write “I KNOW WHY JESUS WEPT, MOTHERFUCKER” on the wall?

A pity.

Oh well.

I like this movie.

My mom liked it, too.

Some of her favorite movies are Home Alone, Sister Act, and Beauty and the Beast (the Disney one).

In spite of that, you should see The Crow if you haven’t done so already. Just don’t go joining any little merchandise-clad subculture, OK?

Numskull’s Rating: 8/10

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