Men from the Monastery | aka Disciples of Death (1974) Review

Posted on January 27, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Men from the Monastery" Chinese Theatrical Poster

"Men from the Monastery" Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Chang Cheh
Writer: Chang Cheh, Ni Kuang
Cast: Chen Kuan Tai, Alexander Fu Sheng, Kong Do, Lo Dik, Jamie Luk Kim Ming, Dang Tak Cheung, Feng Yi, Fung Hak On, Gam Gwan, Ho Pak Kwong, Hsu Hsia
Running Time: 92 min.

By Joe909

One of Chang Cheh’s “Shaolin Cycle” of movies made in Taiwan in the mid-1970s, Men from the Monastery features a unique storytelling approach, an impressive cast, and choreography from master Liu Chia-Liang. It’s not nearly as good as Chang’s Five Shaolin Masters, but it’s worth tracking down.

The film is separated into four mini-movies, the first three concentrating on the three main characters, the last featuring the three of them united as the titular heroes. This storytelling format is one of the main things that drew me to the movie. Chang even increases the artsy quotient by introducing the actors before each mini-movie, and then finally displaying the title in the fourth and final mini-film. More artiness is on show throughout the movie, as in Chang’s other Shaolin movies: namely the occasional use of black and white and colored lens gels. All of this proves that Chang was still putting solid work into his films at this time, before retiring to the quickly-produced Venoms movies of later years.

The first mini-movie (the first three are about fifteen minutes long each) concerns Fu Sheng as Fong Sai-Yuk, who decides it’s time to leave Shaolin. Unfortunately, you can’t just walk out, but instead must pass through the “alley of death.” This is a maze of various traps Fong must avoid. In all honesty, this whole alley of death sequence comes off pretty hokey and low-budget. In fact, there is a definite low-budget feel to this movie, as most scenes take place outdoors, and those sets that are used, such as the alley, are minimal and inferior to the usual Shaws set design. Of course, Fong is able to leave Shaolin. He goes back to his hometown, only to find that it’s been taken over by a Ching bastard who fights men to the death while standing on poles. Fong takes the guy on, each of them standing on poles, a bed of spikes beneath them. This fight is equal to the finale of a regular movie, but here it’s just the end of Fong’s story, which leads directly into the next mini-movie.

The next “chapter” introduces Chi Kuan-Chun, who plays Hu Wei-Chien. He’s having trouble with a local gang of Ching bullies. They beat the shit out of Hu every chance they get, but he keeps coming back for more, regardless of his woman’s pleading. Finally Fong Sai-Yuk shows up and tells him to go to Shaolin Temple, where he can learn how to fight these guys. Hu goes, and we get a super fast-forward as he instantly returns, three years later, ready to kick ass. What Fong’s been doing all this time isn’t mentioned, but he’s there, ready to help his pal get revenge.

The third mini-film is all about Hung Sze-Kwan, as played by Chen Kuan-Tai. Hung’s running a guerrilla war against the Chings, but realizes he’s just one man, and can’t kill them all. Eventually he hooks up with Fong Sai-Yuk and Hu Wei-Chien, and the three of them manage to get rid of some Ching spies. It’s at this point the trio discovers that Shaolin has been burned to the ground. It’s payback time!

The burning of Shaolin leads into the fourth and final mini-movie. The three heroes hole up with several comrades and train themselves, knowing a Ching assault is soon to come. Sure enough it does, and this last half of the movie is wall-to-wall action. At many points it gets very gory, with men getting impaled by swords and spears and bleeding profusely, but all of this is filmed in black and white, to obscure the gore. Apparently this isn’t just US censorship; the Asian prints are supposedly the same. I guess we’ll find out for sure whenever Celestial gets around to releasing a remastered print. Two of the three heroes give their lives for the cause, one of them dying in a particularly-disturbing manner. This finale isn’t as thrilling as I would’ve wished, as the film lacks any memorable villains to root against.

Acting is uniformly strong, though Fu Sheng’s martial abilities aren’t as believable this early in his career. He’s also not nearly as comedic as in other films, instead playing Fong Sai-Yuk as a grimly determined hell raiser. Chi Kuan-Chun however was always a capable martial artist, and it’s hard buying it when he gets his ass handed to him repetitively throughout the first half of his story. Chen Kuan-Tai turns in the solid performance one would expect. And unusually for a Chang movie, a handful of women have important roles in the film, none of them cardboard cutouts.

Currently this film is available as a very low-grade Panmedia DVD. Only get it if you’ve got a jones to see the movie. Otherwise, wait for the Celestial remaster. I’m sure seeing this movie in remastered widescreen will improve the experience greatly. I’ll miss the English dub, though. Whereas most old-school movies feature English dubbing by guys with British or Kiwi accents, Men from the Monastery features actors with SEVERE British accents, which adds to the fun factor. I kept expecting someone to say: “Roit, luv, drop ’em!” or something to that effect. Several Shaw Brothers movies, such as Liu Chia-Liang’s Executioners from Shaolin, Lo Lieh’s Clan of the White Lotus, or Chang Cheh’s Venoms flick Shaolin Rescuers could serve as direct sequels to this film, so seek those out if you want to know “the rest of the story.”

Joe909’s Rating: 7.5/10

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Chinese Boxer, The | aka Hammer of God (1970) Review

Posted on January 27, 2011 by JJ Bona
"The Chinese Boxer" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“The Chinese Boxer” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Jimmy Wang Yu
Cast: Jimmy Wang Yu, Lo Lieh, Wong Ping, Chiu Hung, Cheng Lui, Fong Min, Chan Sing, Yuen Wo Ping, Wong Chung, Wong Ching, Jason Pai Piao
Running Time: 85 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Jesus. Bruce Lee sure screwed Jimmy Wang Yu over.

Fact #1: The Chinese Boxer was the first martial arts movie to embrace the “I must avenge my teacher” theme.

Fact #2: The Chinese Boxer was the first martial arts movie to feature bare-handed kung fu choreography. Before this, they were all wushu style action sequences.

Fact #3: The Chinese Boxer was the first martial arts movie to feature a scene where one Chinese guy walks into a room full of “Jap bastards” and wipes their asses all over the floor.

These are some pretty crucial evolutions in kung fu cinema, folks. Yet, it’s Bruce Lee who usually gets the credit for them.

But really, you can’t blame anyone for wrongly giving Bruce the credit for this stuff. The thing with Wang Yu is: no matter how many one-armed films he makes; how many eyeball sockets he pokes out; and how many times he co-stars with George Lazenby, he’ll never ever match Bruce Lee’s striking presence and intense physical skill.

It gets worse for Wang Yu. Even though he created highly influential kung fu films, he’s still often called a “has-been” and is usually put in the same category as Bruce Le or Bolo; especially by those who are unaware of his important role in the industry. Even his Master of the Flying Guillotine (which he also wrote and directed) is one of the first martial arts “death tournament” films. Yet, few people connect his name to this accomplishment.

Interestingly, Wang Yu went on to be a bad ass in his own right. While Bruce Lee was busy swallowing poisonous aspirin (planted in Betty Ting Pei’s one-night-stand-purse by ninjas), Wang Yu went on to become a real life, high ranked triad member. There are even stories of how he single-handedly defeated a pack of rival gangsters during a bloody knife fight. He also supposedly saved Jackie from getting killed by Lo Wei’s organization (but that’s another story). I mean, how cool is that?

The Chinese Boxer (also known as Hammer of God) is pure entertainment, especially if you’re in it just just for the action. It’s colorful, corny (for example, Wang Yu kicking ass while wearing a surgical mask and rice-sack mittens on his fists) and filled with more quick cuts and extreme zooms than any chopsocky I’ve ever seen.

The brutality is all over the place. It’s hard hitting and savagely bloody. The fight choreography by Tong Gaai is of early 1970s basher quality, but nonetheless, it’s interesting and doesn’t bore.

The production is solid. Some of the wide angle shots were obviously influenced by Japanese samurai films and are stunning to look at.

The villains are cartoonish, charismatic and have Mortal Kombat-like abilities. At one point, a Japanese baddie (Lo Wei) jumps up and breaks through a ceiling – then lands – for no apparant reason. The main villain’s right hand man (Wang Chung) sports a sinister white-powdered face and his kung fu technique is plucking out people’s eyeballs.

DVD NOTE: Celestial hardly fails when it comes to their re-mastered Shaw Brothers DVDs. However, their release of The Chinese Boxer is seriously f-cked up. During some very crucial parts of the film, the original soundtrack score was omitted for whatever reason. In turn, Celestial worked in new synthesized music and it sounds downright terrible. It’s very noticable and very annoying. I wouldn’t be surprised if some no-talent schmuck was hired to orchestrate the new synth music using an old Casio keyboard.

Don’t worry, though. It will, in no way, ruin your overall appreciation for this milestone kung fu classic.

Mighty Peking Man: 8/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , |

Drunken Monkey (2003) Review

Posted on January 27, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Drunken Monkey" DVD Cover

“Drunken Monkey” DVD Cover

Director: Lau Kar-Leung
Cast: Wu Jing, Lau Kar Leung, Shannon Yao Yao, Chi Kuan Chun, Gordon Liu, Li Hai Tao, Chun Hoi Liu, Sammy Lau Wing Kin, Lau Kar Wing, Lau Kar Yung
Running Time: 97 min.

By Numskull

The first Shaw Brothers film since 1985. Lau Kar-Leung’s return to the director’s chair after eight years. The first old school, damn the torpedoes, honest-to-God Hong Kong martial arts flick of the new millennium, after a long string of crapfests starring pop music stars who have no business being in front of a movie camera. Just cause for fans of the genre to shriek with delight. The conditions surrounding Drunken Monkey, I’m afraid, are of considerably more significance than the film itself.

I’m not going to pretend that the production of this movie was a Great Big Deal for me. Unlike a lot of you folks, I’m not an especially devoted follower of the martial arts genre and I didn’t grow up on Saturday morning Kung Fu Theater on TV. My reaction to the news that the legendary Shaw Brothers studio was returning to active filmmaking and that one of its most esteemed directors was going to christen the comeback was a casual “hey, cool” as opposed to the fervent joy that a lot of the die-hards probably felt. So, it is with only moderate disappointment that I, with my limited expertise in this area, consider Drunken Monkey a largely unremarkable effort.

It starts out promisingly enough, with the principal actors doing a martial arts demo during the opening credits, like in many kung fu films of yesteryear. We are then introduced to Man Pao (Chiang Chun Wan) and Bill Chun-Yuen (Lau Kar-Leung), two brothers who run a delivery company for those extra-special, bandit-drawing packages. Man Pao uses the business to facilitate an opium smuggling operation, and when Bill finds out about this, he is marked for death by Yu Hoi-Yeung, Man Pao’s partner in crime. After a grueling battle with Yu and his henchmen, Bill is left for dead but found by a young woman named Mandy (Shannon Yao, who is welcome to come and kick my ass anytime she likes).

The film then jumps ahead by a year, and there is a drastic change in tone and focus. It now follows the exploits of Chan Ka-Yip (Lau Wing Kin) and his “grand-uncle” Tak (Jason Wu Jing), who is actually of comparable age. Ka-Yip is an artist who wants to illustrate a monkey style kung fu handbook and finds himself unable to finish the project in a satisfactory manner. Who better to resolve this problem than renowned monkey kung fu master Bill Chun-Yuen?

A. Nobody
B. A dead dog
C. King Kong
D. The gorilla from that phony “Ghostbusters” cartoon show that had nothing to do with the movie

Okay, let’s assume you selected “A” and move along. Ka-Yip and Tak fuck around for a while to pad the length of the film and then go looking for Bill. There’s a lot of irksome, buffoonish comedy in this phase of the movie. Ka-Yip has a high-spirited mother and a dour father, somewhat reminiscent of Wong Fei Hung’s dad and aunt in Drunken Master 2, which Lau Kar-Leung also directed until Jackie Chan got tired of having to use real kung fu and sacked him. I hoped that things would progress more steadily after these two dolts met Mandy and Hung Yat-fu (the one and only Gordon Liu), a detective who meets the Chun-Yuen brothers in the first part of the film. Alas, more lagging ensues. I don’t mind forty fightless minutes in a martial arts movie, as long as those forty minutes are filled with worthwhile stuff. But, The Tak & Ka-Yip Show wears out its welcome pretty quickly.

Things do heat up eventually, and after Ka-Yip and Tak get whipped into fighting shape by Bill (Mandy is already taken care of), there’s a big battle involving pretty much every surviving character, with Tak getting a bit more spotlight than the rest. Good stuff, but getting there was a chore.

Don’t get the idea that Drunken Monkey is a bad kung fu movie. I’ve seen worse. MUCH worse. But it’s not quite the Second Coming that some folks would expect from the circumstances surrounding its release.

Numskull’s Rating: 6/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , |

Organized Crime and Triad Bureau | aka OCTB (1993) Review

Posted on January 26, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Organized Crime & Triad Bureau" DVD Cover

“Organized Crime & Triad Bureau” DVD Cover

Director: Kirk Wong
Cast: Danny Lee, Anthony Wong, Cecilia Yip, Roy Cheung, Parkman Wong, Ricky Yi, Fan Siu Wong, Lee Fai, Louis Koo, Stephen Chan, Eric Kee
Running Time: 100 min.

By Woody

It’s been months since I’ve watched a Hong Kong film. After discovering the intelligent cinema of countries like Japan and Korea, it’s hard for me to go back to simple minded action films and lame-brained humor. Save a few choice directors and stars (Wong Kar-wai, Leung Chui Wai, Fruit Chan), Hong Kong cinema is all but dead to me. But there was a point in time when great films were made in Hong Kong. That point, for the most part, has passed. The talent well, as far as directors are concerned, has dried up. The Asian economic crisis has really taken it’s toll on the films in another way. People don’t want to go to the movies to think. That’s always been a problem with Hong Kong movies…or a good thing, depending on why you watch them. People in Hong kong want escapist entertainment. When they are asked to think about something in a film, they will often do it subconsciously, as open discussion of politics in an unspoken no-no in the world of HK film. And after the said crisis, it’s gotten even worse. Whatever complexity or intelligence was once in the movies has all but given way to Wong Jingery and sub-Hollywood crap.

So I wasn’t too enthusiastic when I bought “Organized Crime and Triad Bureau”. No, it’s not a recent Hong Kong film, but my impression of Hong Kong movies has been at an all time low. I want films that are challenging. That make you think. That don’t supply easy answers. OCTB, as it will be referred to throughout the remainder of this review, is one such film.

Inspector San (Danny Lee) is a man obsessed. Head of a squad within the Organized Crime Bureau, San is your typical Dirty Harry, a man who will get justice, no matter what the cost. San and his squad repeatedly beat and torture suspects, and are always on the look out for the CAPO, who are there to make sure such things do not happen. At the present moment, San is obsessing over the capture of Tung (Anthony Wong), a gun-running gangster on the run with with gun-toting mistress (Cecilia Yip). Tung is not your typical gangster. A violent gangster on the outside, inside Tung is a caring father, and deeply loves his mistress, whom he has promised to protect when she was violently raped years earlier.

The scene that I think shows the greatness of this film comes later on. Tung has escaped the clutches of San and his men in a hospital, and is trapped in an operating room, where a young boy is being operated on. There is a stand-off. The doctors are unable to operate. Tung looks at the boy’s mother and then at the boy, who is covered in burnt flesh. He gives himself up, telling to the doctors to finish operating. This comes only minutes after a scene in which we are shown the graphic details of Tung’s crimes, including cutting off one ma’s arms, legs, and genitals. There are no easy answers in this film. Tung and San are both in that grey area. You root for Tung to escape, but know he is a ruthless killer. You want San to lose, but know he is fighting for justice.

What is different here than most Hong Kong films is that this film has characters and not characters. Tung and San are both humanized. We feel empathy for both of them. We feel for Tung and his mistress, you deeply love eachother. We feel for San, whose ex-wife is cruelly used against him. Who cares about victim’s rights over the rights of a killer. Very few films, Hong Kong or otherwise, get that deep, and that alone makes this worth checking out.

On the action front, as this is an action movie, you will not be disappointed. Kirk Wong brings his usual flair to the action scenes, which, though often intricate or unlogical, feel realistic due to the depth of the proceedings. There is some great guerrilla filmmaking on display here, with a gunfight taking place in Kowloon towards the end that just had to have been shot without permits.

The performances are what make this film great. Danny Lee essentially reprises his character in Woo’s “The Killer” here, only making him less honorable and noble. Lee plays San as a man who could care less about Miranda Rights. A man obsessed with justice, no matter what the cost. Cecilia Yip is haunting as Tung’s mistress. After being rescued years before by Tung following a brutal rape, she devotes her life to the troubled man, even when he repeatedly cheats on her.

But more than anything, this film belongs to Anthony Wong. It’s astounding to see him go from the previous year’s over-the-top performance in “The Untold Story” to a restained and stoic one here. Wong plays Tung as a man of contradictions. He’s a honorable, loyal friend…who kills people. He loves his mistress…but sleeps with other women. He is a devoted father…but has no problem with killing the fathers of others. He is a good man…and an evil one. Wong shows that Tung is an bad man who wants to do the right things. He doesn’t want to do wrong, but it’s in his nature.

This is the best Hong Kong film I have seen in a long, long while. It is action packed, but intelligent. It doesn’t give you any easy answers. You have to make up your own mind about what is right and wrong. It does something the average Hong Kong film wouldn’t dream of doing. It makes you think.

Woody’s Rating: 9/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , |

Friends (1973) Review

Posted on January 26, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Friends" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“Friends” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Chang Cheh
Writer: I Kuang, Chang Cheh
Producer: Run Run Shaw
Cast: David Chiang, Alexander Fu Sheng, Lily Li Li-Li, Lo Dik, Wai Wang, Wong Kwong Yue, Bruce Tong, Chow Yun Gin, Lee Yung Git, Tino Wong Cheung, Yen Shi-Kwan, Fung Hak On, Alan Chan, Yuen Shun-Yi, Huang Ha, Got Dik Wa, Leung Gwing Wan, Fung Ging Man, Chen Wo-Fu
Running Time: 104 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Unlike Chang Cheh’s usual recipe for films like “The Young Rebel,” “Chinatown Kid” and “The Delinquent,” “Friends” is not another story revolving around a troubled teen who gets mixed with up all sorts of gangster shit. Instead, we get seven troubled teenagers who get mixed up with all sorts of gangster shit. However, the movie mainly centers around the two characters played by David Chiang and Alexander Fu Sheng. The rest of the guys are thrown in for backstory (so don’t worry about about a convoluted character-heavy plot).

“Friends” starts out 10 years after the events of the movie. All seven friends are getting together for a reunion and are talking about the “good old days” of partying and causing trouble in night clubs. Following this quick opening scene, the rest of the movie is one long flashback.

Jiaji (Alexander Fu Sheng) is the son of a strict billionaire. Hua Heng (David Chiang) is a starving artist trying to make a living. One day, Jiaji bumps into Hua Heng during a brawl. After the two successfully outdo their opponents, the two become friends. Hua Heng introduces Jiaji to the rest of his buddies and they all form an unbreakable friendship. Thrilled with his new peers and bored of his lavish and sheltered lifestyle, Jiaji decides to run away from home to hang out with his new mates.

It’s only when Hua Heng’s girlfriend, Gao Xin (Lily Li), fails to to pay off some debts owed to local gangsters that serious trouble starts to brew. To help pay off the debt, Jiaji decides to trick his father into giving up some money. However, this sneaky move ignites a series of events that puts them all into a deadly situation.

Watching the late Alexander Fu Sheng in “Friends” makes me realize how much he makes David Chiang look like Bruce Lee’s cardboard cut-out performance in “Game of Death.” Well, maybe not that bad, but who WOULDN’T lose 50% of their charisma standing next to Fu Sheng?

And speaking of Alexander Fu Sheng, what a waste of talent. Sharp looks. Charming personality. Natural screen presence. In fact, if Jackie Chan hadn’t proved that he could routinely defy death, Fu Sheng would have been the man (imagine Fu Sheng in “The Tuxedo” instead of Chan). He’s known around the world as “The James Dean of Hong Kong.” (Come to think of it, why do Asians always have to take their legendary stars and equate them with iconic American talent? Anita Mui, the “Madonna of Hong Kong”; Chow Yun Fat, the “Cary Grant of Hong Kong.” I mean, you don’t see Americans saying things like “Steven Spielberg, the Tsui Hark of America.”

Anyway, for more on Alexander Fu Sheng, be sure to check out the documentary that’s included as an extra with the Celestial DVD. It’s short but sweet. It also could have been more informative, but it still offers a quick and easy way to get to know this great talent.

Choreography greats Lau Kar Leung and Tong Gaai do their thing. Whatever. Typical mid-1970s Shaw shit. If it’s not interesting, it’s boring. I mean, seriously, who the fuck watches a tale of scrawny little bad-asses in a Chang Cheh flick for the fluid action? For me, it’s story time!

“Friends” has a great soundtrack, especially if you’re into the funkiest of obscure ’70s music. Other songs contain original music with lyics written by Chang Cheh (like he did with “Singing Killer”). Also, it’s nice to see that Chang Cheh “borrowed” Ennio Morricone’s theme from “Death Rides A Horse,” which was recently resurrected in Quentin Tarantino’s “Kill Bill Vol. 1.”

If you’re expecting lots of blood and a high bodycount, then you might be disappointed in “Friends.” I wasn’t, however. (And believe me, I live for Chang Cheh bloodfests.) Though it’s lighthearted, it still has lots of action and the plot is very entertaining, enjoyable and refreshing. It’s also nice to see the rare pair up of David Chiang and the late Alexander Fu Sheng.

Highly recommended.

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 8/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , |

Savage Five, The (1974) Review

Posted on January 26, 2011 by JJ Bona
"The Savage Five" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“The Savage Five” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Chang Cheh
Producer: Sir Run Run Shaw
Cast: David Chiang, Ti Lung, Chen Kuan Tai, Danny Lee, Wong Chung, Wai Wang, Wang Ping-Ping, Lu Ti, Kong Do, Wong Ching, Jamie Luk, Ngaai Fei, Yen Shi Kwan
Running Time: 91 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

A gang of bandits take refuge in a small town, where they force a locksmith to open a stolen safe containing cash and gold. During their stay, the men decide to have a little fun by beating, raping and murdering innocent people. Amongst the town folk, five guys (David Chiang, Ti Lung, Chen Kuan Tai, Danny Lee and Wang Chung) decide to man-up and take the evil bastards on — hence, the “Savage Five.”

Most of the time, The Savage Five feels more like a Spaghetti Western than a kung fu flick, which is probably intentional. It doesn’t help that a lot of the “borrowed” soundtrack contains snippets of Ennio Morricone’s score from Giulio Petroni’s 1968 flick “Death Rides A Horse.” Plus, you got the whole Western themes going on: small peaceful town disrupted, a locked safe, and a main bad guy, whose weapons of death is not his hands, feet, knife or sword, but a pair of pistols. Also, gun power plays an explosive part of the film’s climax.

For the most part, The Savage Five is pretty straight forward as far as the plot goes. Nothing unusual or no real surprises are uncovered. One thing that is refreshing about the film is none of the five men are good at kung fu; this is why courage, from more or less average men, is probably the main focus of the film.

As far as the action, those who are familiar with Chang Cheh’s work will get what they expect: lots of bloody violence and heroic deaths. Lau Kar-Leung’s choreography is solid, and is not the typical “swinging arm” bullshit we get with most pre-1975 martial arts flicks. Of course, this is what makes most Shaw Brothers projects so special: the ease of creating an all-round quality piece of entertainment.

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 8/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , , |

Police Force (1973) Review

Posted on January 26, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Police Force" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“Police Force” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Chang Cheh
Co-director: Tsai Yang-Ming
Cast: Wong Chung (Wang Chung), Lily Li Li-Li, Wong Hap (Wang Hsia), Alexander Fu Sheng, Got Dik Wa, Wong Kwong Yue, Tino Wong Cheung, Fung Hak On, Bruce Tong, Lau Kar Wing, Yen Shi-Kwan, Hsu Hsia, Yuen Shun-Yi, Brandy Yuen
Running Time: 101 min.

By Joe909

Police Force is a nicely-done early 1970s action vehicle that sports not just kung-fu shenanigans, but also lots of shootouts that prefigure the Heroic Bloodshed of the 1980s. The only problem is, Police Force takes quite a while to get going. Chang Cheh apparently had the resources of the Hong Kong police force at his disposal; unfortunately he used them to sometimes ill effect.

Many old school movies fill up the running time with pointless fights or having the main character go through several forms to show off his skill. Police Force instead fills up a good portion of the first hour with boring, unending parade drills. That’s right, parade drills. Lots of static shots of HK police marching around, presenting arms, and the like. It doesn’t make for riveting cinema.

Thankfully, about an hour into the movie the story kicks up a notch. The film concerns Wang Chung’s character, who joins the police when his buddy Fu Sheng is murdered. The murder itself is strange. It’s supposed to be just a random mugging that goes awry, but for some reason Chang Cheh has the murderer appear earlier in the movie, watching Fu Sheng and Wang Chung compete in a karate tournament. This makes it seem that the murderer has targeted Fu Sheng, or that it’s a conspiracy of some sort.

Anyway, Wang Chung joins the police force so he can find the murderer and get revenge. This seems to be an elaborate plan; any other sane guy would just dress up like a bat and stalk the streets at night, doling out his own form of justice. Regardless, Wang Chung basically flies through training. Most Shaw Brothers movies have that fun factor whereby time passes swiftly. Police Force reigns supreme in that category, however; five years pass in just a few minutes of screen time.

Training and duty have subverted Wang’s original intent; now he no longer seeks to kill Fu Sheng’s murderer. The blood lust that instilled his early career on the force has dissipated. This really provokes the ire of Fu Sheng’s girlfriend, who continuously harasses Wang Chung to get with it, find the killer, and do him in. Wang happens to be working on a case in which an unidentified body holds the key to solving; it turns out that Fu Sheng’s murderer is involved in the case.

Instead of turning the movie into another revenge vehicle, Chang Cheh takes several twists and turns, all of them unexpected and pleasing. The ordinary Chang hero would avenge his brother’s death, while bleeding onto his white outfit from multiple horrendous wounds, but Wang Chung is a staid policeman through and through. The crux of his development comes in a great scene in which he finally comes upon Fu Sheng’s murderer, while Sheng’s ex watches on. And this doesn’t even come at the film’s climax.

The finale features a one-man raid on a criminal boss’ yacht, as Wang Chung (awkwardly) drops onto it from a helicopter and kills countless men before reloading his pistol. I should mention that the production values on this movie are very high. The end sequence is more like something you’d expect from a 1980s action movie, rather than an early 1970s “chop sockey.” I’m really surprised this movie wasn’t picked up for distribution in the West.

There are of course occasional missteps in the plot, but that’s to be expected. Also, I couldn’t help but get sidetracked by the music. Lots of old school movies are infamous for stealing music cues, but Police Force takes the cake. A large portion of the music is taken from Marvin Gaye’s soundtrack to the movie Trouble Man, the main theme in particular. The music editor even proves himself to be an early DJ, by mixing the opening breakbeat from “Trouble Man” into an acid guitar riff by some unknown group.

To sum up, this movie holds a lot of surprises for viewers who figure if they’ve seen one Chang Cheh movie, they’ve seen them all. I do wish some of the parade drill stuff had been tightened up, but once you get past that, you’re rewarded with a nice police procedural/drama/action flick. And on another unfortunate side note, since this movie was made in the early 1970s, you don’t get much of that funky garb the decade would become known for. In other words, not much “bell bottom fury.”

Joe909’s Rating: 8/10

By Mighty Peking Man

When a Karate stud (Alexander Fu Sheng) is murdered, his best friend, Guodung (played by Wang Chung, no relation to the 1980s music group), decides to join the police force to avenge his death. Guodung makes a vow to himself and to his deceased friend’s girlfriend, Shen Yan (Lily Li Li-Li), to catch and kill the murderer. 5 years pass, Guodung, now a senior inspector, discovers deadly new clues that lead to his friend’s killer. The closer he gets, the more his superiors warn him that he’ll be a disgrace to the force if he goes on with a personal vendetta. At the same time, Shen Yan, who is still obsessed with finding the killer, reminds Guodung the reason he joined the force to begin with. Guodung finds himself in the middle of pleasing either the force or Shen Yan; he also realizes the consequences that follow no matter which option he chooses.

Knowing it was directed by Shaw great, Chang Cheh, I was expecting Police Force to be good, but not this good. It never lags and is paced just perfectly. Thanks to the time it was made, it has the colorful 1970’s written all over it. Don’t let the bad polyester clothing and the mini-Datsuns fool you into thinking it’s a typical modern-day chopsocky flick (“Slaughter in San Francisco” and “Rumble in Hong Kong” come to mind — how dare I compare this to that shit, but you get my point.). One thing’s for sure, director Chang Cheh is truly the equivalent of Sam Peckinpah and is obviously the forerunner to John Woo and Ringo Lam.

Police Force marks the first appearance by a young Alexander Fu Sheng. However, he is not the star. He has a small, but crucial role that even Fu Sheng purists should see. Fu Sheng or not, Police Force is a more-than-worthy addition to your Celestial Shaw Brothers DVD collection. Pick it up and Wang Chung tonight.

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 9/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , |

King Eagle (1970) Review

Posted on January 26, 2011 by JJ Bona
"King Eagle" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“King Eagle” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Chang Cheh
Cast: Li Ching, Ti Lung, Cheng Miu (Ching Miao), Cheung Pooi Saan (Chang Pei-Shan), Cheng Lui (Cheng Lei), Bruce Tong (Yim Chaan), Chan Sing, Wong Chung, Tung Li, Hung Lau, Cliff Lok, Lee Sau Kei, Wong Kwong Yue, Yuen Wo Ping, Yuen Cheung Yan, Yuen Shun-Yi, Yen Shi Kwan
Running Time: 80 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Ti Lung plays a loner swordsman named Jin Fei (aka King Eagle) who, despite being one of the best fighters in the martial world, minds his own business and avoids fights whenever possible.

One day, Jin Fei crosses paths with an injured man, who had just escaped a group of attackers. Though barely alive, the man manages to pass on secret information about how the leader of the Tien Yi Tong clan was betrayed and murdered by Hung Sing-tien (Cheung Pooi-saan), the clan’s second in command.

Knowing he’s going to die any second, the man urges Jin Fei to deliver his crucial message to the rest of the Tien Yi Tong clan; but just as Jin Fei is about to ignore the situation and walk off, the gang of attackers (Hung Sing-tien’s men) show up and suspect that their victim might have “talked” to Jin Fei…

There’s a lot more to King Eagle, but basically the movie revolves around the act of betrayal, revenge, and surprisingly, love. Yes, there’s a romantic subplot revolving Jin Fei falling for a woman named Yuk Lin, played by Li Ching. Oddly, Li Ching has a dual role – both as Jin Fei’s love ineterest, and as Yuk Lin’s evil younger sister, who works under the notorious Hung Sing-tien.

Everything from the costumes, set designs and just the overall look, are fantastic. And for being a film from 1970, they managed to do a great job with the camera effects when the two Li Chings appeared on the screen together. I dig the James Bond “borrowed” On Her Majesty’s Secret Service music, as well.

King Eagle has enough action (featuring solid choreography job by Tong Gaai and Yuen Cheung Yan) and for the most part, flows along at a decent pace.

However, I do have a grip that really stops it from being a Chang Cheh film that I could have really loved: the film’s ending was very anti-climactic and disappointing. Maybe I’m just used to those good old Chang Cheh endings; you know, long bloody fights, heroes dying very slowly and painfully. The final fight for King Eagle seemed like it ended before it even started. Come to think of it, some of the action in the first half of the film was a lot more gripping.

I say give it shot. After all, it’s a Chang Cheh film.

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 7/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , , |

Condemned, The (1976) Review

Posted on January 26, 2011 by JJ Bona
"The Condemned" Chinese DVD Cover

“The Condemned” Chinese DVD Cover

Director: David Chiang
Cast: David Chiang, Lily Li Li-Li, Choi Wang (Tsai Hung), Pai Ying, Guk Fung (Ku Feng), Woo Gam, Kong Yeung, Lee Hoi Sang, Chan Shen, Keung Hon, Shum Lo, Wong Ching, Yuen Sam, Robert Tai, Shih Ting Ken, Poon Cheung Ming, Gam Man Hei, Yen Shi-Kwan
Running Time: 102 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Obviously, the folks at Celestial (the company who released this DVD) decided to write the plot without even watching the movie first. Check out the description off the DVD case:

“In the film, Chiang plays a righteous character who helps an unjustly imprisoned swordsman accused of stealing. Together they break out of prison and serve notice to all the evil men in their lives that a new deadly duo is in town.“

Well, it’s half right. They do break out of prison to get revenge. And yes, David Chiang does play a righteous character who helps an unjustly imprisoned character, only, the character (played by Tsai Hung) is not a swordsman, he’s a straight up kung fu fighter (totally swordless!); and he wasn’t accused of stealing, he was thrown into prison because he was blamed for murder. Also, the thief they’re talking about is actually Chiang himself, not Tsai Hung’s character.

Anyways, not really important, but I thought I’d point that out since some of us like to watch films based on plot.

After watching The Condemned and David Chiang’s other directorial project, The Drug Addict (which I rated a 4/10), it’s pretty safe to say that the guy definitely belongs in front of the camera. In this case, he not only directs The Condemed, but also stars in it, along with Tsai Hung.

Bascially, The Condemned is shitty and decent at the same time.

Much of the film is draggy, uninteresting and almost feels like you’re watching a non-Shaw Brothers generic kung fu flick (not to say that all Shaw flicks are good…). Even David Chiang’s performance is sorta half-assed. I mean, we still get that David Chiang charm, but here, his performance seems a tad less magnetic – let’s put it this way, Chang Cheh gets a better performance out of the guy.

In addition to David Chiang, Chan Shen, Pai Ying, Ku Feng and Lily Li, we are introduced to Tsai Hung’s character, the second half of the duo. I don’t know much about the actor, since I’ve I’ve only seen him in a couple of other titles (and he usually plays a bad guy), but I can tell you this much: he has as much charasima as a bowl of corn flakes. He looks like a lizard and has some of the worst facial expressions I’ve ever seen; but on the other side of the coin, he’s one hell of a bad ass. And you’ll know why David Chiang picked him to begin with once you’re a little more than half way through the movie…

And this is where The Condemned gets decent. It nearly becomes a Bruceploitation movie with the way Tsai Hung takes on the bad guys with his Bruce Lee-style fighting moves: Fights are direct and solid, guys are falling to the ground from a single punch or kick, etc. Meanwhile, snippets from Lalo Schifrin’s Enter The Dragon score are playing in the background (either that, or a soundtrack that sounds very similar in style).

One thing I really dug was the cool visual effects which suddenly appear out of nowhere. At one point, blood literally drips (not splashes) down from the camera lense. Also, not sure if this is the first film to so, but there are a couple of bone-cracking special effects (ie Romeo Must Die) that are both effective and cheesy.

Basically, if you can sit through most of the movie, you’ll be kindly rewarded with the kung fu action towards the film’s last third. It gets violent, bloody and even catches you by surprise with some of its cruelty.

All in all, not bad. Not good. Like I said, it’s shitty and decent at the same time. I can think of hundreds of kung fu films to watch before recommending this one…

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 5/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , , |

Human Lanterns | aka Human Skin Lanterns (1982) Review

Posted on January 26, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Human Lanterns" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“Human Lanterns” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Sun Chung
Cast: Lau Wing, Lo Lieh, Chen Kuan Tai, Tien Ni, Sun Chien, Choh Seung Wan, Lam Sau Kwan, Lo Meng, Ngaai Fei, Siu Yam Yam, Erik Chan, Cheng Miu, Cheung Chok Chow, Fung King Man, Ha Ping, Hon Lai Fan, Lam Chi Tai
Running Time: 95 min.

By Mighty Peking Man

Long before Anthony Wong was serving human Chinese “pork” buns in Untold Story (1993), Lo Lieh was kidnapping woman and making beautiful Chinese lanterns out of their freshly peeled human skin.

One thing I like about Human Lanterns is that it’s straight forward and crystal clear. It’s almost as if Suen Chung puts himself in the viewers’ shoes when he’s planning his storytelling process. The characters are well thought out with a flash of differentiation (Lau Wing and Chen Kuan Tai have a great chemistry). There’s mystery, but no real twisty secrets that many films rely on. Everything is pretty much in-your-face with no bullshit attached.

Human Lanterns has a fine balance of well-choreographed martial arts, a hint of horror and a pleasant amount of gore. As you’d probably expect, action is still the main showcase of the movie. With a title like Human Lanterns, you’d expect a lot of explicit imagery; there is, but not a whole lot, but as long as you’re expecting a “kung fu movie” first, you’ll be pleased if you’re hunting for a dose of shock value.

I wonder how this flick would turn out in the brutality department if someone like Chang Cheh directed it (I have a feeling the guy would go nuts over the blood and gore), but as it stands, Suen Chung did a great job as is and any drastic change would only lesson the film’s appeal.

Human Lanterns is my first and only venture into the films of Suen Chung. Judging from what I saw here, I wouldn’t mind checking out more of his work.

Look for memorable guest appearances by Venoms Lo Meng (as a contract killer) and Sun Chien (as a cop).

Mighty Peking Man’s Rating: 8/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , |

Sanjuro (1962) Review

Posted on January 25, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Sanjuro" Japanese Theatrical Poster

“Sanjuro” Japanese Theatrical Poster

Director: Akira Kurosawa
Writer: Ryuzo Kikushima, Akira Kurosawa
Cast: Toshiro Mifune, Tatsuya Nakadai, Keiju Kobayashi, Yuzo Kayama, Reiko Dan, Akihiko Hirata, Takashi Shimura, Kamatari Fujiwara, Takako Irie, Masao Shimizu
Running Time: 96 min.

By Mairosu

After Yojimbo proved to be a huge commercial hit, messrs Kurosawa and Mifune teamed up for another humorous caper about the wisecracking nameless ronin, and this time with equal success. Sanjuro is admittedly more light-hearted and has more action than the faux-serious Yojimbo, and those characteristics, along with the short running time, make it probably the best Kurosawa film for the newcomers to his oeuvre.

This time, our reluctant hero – the scruffy ronin who likes to call himself “Sanjuro” (Mifune) with a random plant serving as his family name (in Yojimbo he’s Sanjuro Mullberry (Kuwabatake), here he’s Sanjuro Camelia (Tsubake) – is getting busy helping some young samurai solve a case of a corrupt superintendent and a loyal chamberlain (for the speaking impaired of you, “chamberlain” means “high ranking court official”). The superintendent has taken the chamberlain captive as a result of one youngster’s faux pas, and is just about ready to send in his troops to finish off the young bucks, but – but – there comes Sanjuro to the rescue. Literally out of the blue, Sanjuro joins the fray and first brainstorms a way out, then fends off all the guards and then gets fully involved in the rescue plot.

This time, unlike in Hidden Fortress, it is high adventure. I found Sanjuro much more pleasing on a pure arcade level, as the film is filled with wisecracks and action sequences (which are on a better level than in Yojimbo, and you even hear the swordplay sound effects here and there). Again, director abandons his habit of implementing social commentary throughout the film and just concentrates on the fun ride that this film proved to be. The only social note might be that again, individual thinks better than a group, but that’s nothing which is too purposely hammered into your head. There is however a hilarious element to the whole story, and that is the appearance and the dialogue of Chamberlain’s wife and daughter, who are a total contrast from the usual “damsel in distress” – the old lady is pretty calm and composed throughout the whole of film, and still manages to dispense some pearls of wisdom to Sanjuro such as “killing is a very bad habit”. The funniest moment is when Sanjuro is supposed to give a sign to the rest of the samurai by sending white camellias down the stream – when that happens, everyone jumps alert at the good guys’ stronghold, while the women just charmingly react with “oooh, how nice !” (referring to the bunch of camellias floating down the stream).

There is an interesting debate going on about the time period in which Sanjuro is set. Most people have noticed that, unlike Yojimbo, Sanjuro is set in a more serene and socially stable period – which can be observed on the garments of the protagonists. So, basically, what we have here is the same character – of same age, “thirty, going to forty” – in a time period two decades prior to Yojimbo. Someone at IMDB pitched the idea that Sanjuro is actually just a roaming folk hero and a protective spirit, who intervenes whenever something goes awry, and that sounds like the most likely solution one could subscribe to. Unless you think that Mifunes grow on a tree in Japan, which again, might not be that unlikely.

I’ll have to warn the potential viewers about the bloody final duel which occurs between Mifune and Tatsuya Nakadai, who just like in Yojimbo reprises the role of the main villain (this time much less flamboyant and without a firearm). Two of them engage in a very brief duel on a plain minutes before the ending credits, and you’re advised not to even blink when they assume their fighting positions – if you’re not careful, the shot might breeze by you and you might miss one of the greatest climaxes in the Japanese contemporary cinema (a subjective opinion obviously), right up there with the arrow salvo of Throne of Blood and Watanabe’s last breath in Ikiru.

So, so far, I saw six Kurosawa films in seven days, and the top list can be ranked like this as of now:

1. Ikiru
2. Throne of Blood
3. Sanjuro
4. Yojimbo
5. Stray Dog
6. Hidden Fortress

And to think that all six are actually quality work. I have nothing against Hidden Fortress really, it’s a classy film in its own right and I gave it three stars, but I liked Sanjuro, Yojimbo and Stray Dog just a shade better. Well, in all honesty, I like Sanjuro a few shades better than Yojimbo, Stray Dog and Hidden Fortress, hence…

Mairosu’s Rating: 8.5/10

Posted in All, Japanese, News, Reviews | Tagged , |

Killer Meteors, The (1977) Review

Posted on January 25, 2011 by JJ Bona
"The Killer Meteors" Japanese DVD Cover

“The Killer Meteors” Japanese DVD Cover

Director: Lo Wei
Cast: Jackie Chan, Jimmy Wang Yu, Philip Ko Fei, Lee Man Tai, Chan Wai Lau, Man Man, Ma Kei, Tung Lam, Sit Hon, Lily Lan Yu Li, Chan Sam Lam, Ching Kuo Chung
Running Time: 91 min.

By Numskull

Easily one of the five worst movies that Jackie Chan has appeared in, and what a surprise that the Anti-Christ himself, Jimmy Wang Fuck Yu, is involved. Granted, he wasn’t yet the benevolent, sanctuary-granting angel that he was when Island of Fire was made, but still, the mere sight of this man on-screen is enough to send waves of negative psychic energy from the TV screen and into your living room. It won’t do anything as bland and trite as levitate your bed or bang your pots and pans… oh no, it will give your pets rabies, drive pre-adolescent children mad with horrific hallucinations, and generally fuck your shit up. You have been warned. Anyway, here are…

10 things I would almost rather do instead of watching Killer Meteors: 

  1. Parade through Harlem with a Nazi flag
  2. Watch a porno movie with Roseanne Barr performing sordid sexual acts upon a helpless killer whale
  3. Trade places with the guy who gets trapped in the room with the poison gas in the beginning of The Rock.
  4. Be buried chin-deep in bloody stool and then go for a swim in shark-infested waters
  5. Implant my consciousness into the body of a hamster being presented to Richard Gere
  6. Hire a blind acupuncture therapist to neutralize a pain in my scrotum
  7. Sodomize a llama
  8. Undergo two decades of martial arts training and then leave my career in the hands of Robert Clouse
  9. Watch “Fantasy Mission Farce”
  10. Get anally raped by Jimmy Wang Yu

P.S. Sodomy is funny (^_^)

Numskull’s Rating: 1/10

 

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Master with Cracked Fingers | aka Snake Fist Fighter (1974) Review

Posted on January 25, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Master with Cracked Fingers" American Theatrical Poster

“Master with Cracked Fingers” American Theatrical Poster

AKA: Cub Tiger From Kwan Tung
Director: Ngai Hoi Fung
Cast: Jackie Chan, Tien Feng, Shu Pei Pei, Hon Gwok Choi, Chen Hung Lieh, Kwan Chung, Gam Gwan, Shut-Ma Wa Lung, Ma Kim Tong, Wong Mei, Alan Chan, Chiang Kam, Chin Yuet Sang, Gam Lau, Kwan Yung Moon, Mars, Dean Shek Tien, Yuen Biao, Simon Yuen, Yuen Yat Chor
Running Time: 79 min.

By Numskull

This sorry excuse for a kung fu movie is a veritable treasure trove of unintentionally funny bits and dialogue snippets (much like New Fist of Fury, with its gems like “I hate the Japs!” and “The Japanese are the best!”). Most amusing is the guy who lays Jackie’s surrogate father, who would rather have his own daughter get raped than have Jackie lift a finger in her defense. Just imagine if this were re-dubbed to portray Jackie and his pop and sis (pallindromes!) as stereotypical backwoods types:

PAW: Now son, the Sherriff dun tole me that you been gittin’ into trouble again, pickin’ fights all ovah creation.

SON: But paw, them polecats was settin’ ta VI-O-late dear ole sis. That just ain’t the Lord’s way, paw. Ain’t nobody supposed to be settin’ their hands on her, ‘cept fer you an’ me of course cuz we is her kin.

PAW: Don’t you be givin’ yer paw no back-talk. I make the rules in this house, y’hear? It ain’t right fer you ta go beatin’ folks like your dear departed maw an’ I always beat you an’ yore sister. Now do as yer paw tells ya and catch these here flower pots an’ change the dirt.

SON: Aw, damn it paw, I dun changed it yesterday!

PAW: Now what did ah just say?!? You do as yore told, an’ you do it now. An’ remember, don’t go ’round spreadin’ no more VI-o-lence, and mind yer cussin’, else I’ll beat the shit outta ya. Now git goin’!

Hmmm…interesting. Now how about a Shakespeare version? We will commence anon:

OLD MAN. O my son, what is this talk that befalls mine ears concerning a brawl most shameful this very day?

JACKIE. Much to my shame, I didst partake in such frenzy. But lest you, father, think my act unjustified, I do hasten to illuminate the cause. It seems the drunken knaves with whom I did trade blows sought to deprive mine dearest sister of her maidenhood.

OLD MAN. You speak thus! But thy words are womanish, and in thy eagerness to leap upon the nearest Son of Adam for reasons slight, I should say my son doth wish himself a lecherous and sinful Daughter of Eve!

JACKIE. Woe and misery rain upon this scrotum, for if I were a man not unlike mine sister, verily I wouldst have two fine and sumptuous titties.

OLD MAN. Silence! One word more on the matter and I shalt force mine flower pots upon you and declare before God almighty that I have not a son!

JACKIE. Then make that declaration, old one, for it is mine view that thou’rt a jackass most unscrupulous, and the burden of resolving this unhappy lot doth fall into mine dutiful hands.

OLD MAN. O, how sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless child!

EXEUNT.

I dunno. It could probably use some more of the Bard’s trademark utterly-meaningless-poetry-in-mid-sentence. We’ll try a typical Hollywood testosterone-flooded Jean-Clod Van Damme-style action flick and then wrap up:

FATHER: John! I just heard on the police scanner that some inner city motherfuckers just tried to gang-bang your sister, and that you used all those lethal fighting skills you picked up on the playground during grades K-4 to stop them! Is it true?

JOHN ASSKICKER: No dad, actually I just ran back to uncle’s restaurant, grabbed his M-60 from behind the counter, made it back just in time to keep her pubes from being shown to the audience, and mowed down every one of the creeps like so much grass. She’s safe now, but I still have to have a climactic showdown with the big bad guy. I’ll be back in time to clean your flower pots, OK?

All right, I admit that didn’t work. Fortunately, that’s not the only unfathomably stupid scene in this movie. There’s also the part where the mini-gang leader tells the bad guys to go burn down Jackie’s house. Then, as an afterthought, he says: “And another thing…when you’re done with that, kill him!” Of course, the bad guys know better than to question their boss, even though they know full well that they could save a hell of a lot of time and effort by just killing him first (after several failed attempts…). “All right, that’s enough,” he said, for all was indeed right, and that was in fact enough. The first rating is the serious one. The second is for the enjoyment you can get out of this movie by pulling a Mystery Science Theater 3000 on it.

Numskull’s Rating: 3/10, 7/10

By Alvin George

This is the movie where Jackie Chan had his first starring role. However, it happens to be pure shit. This film was never, repeat, NEVER completed. Jackie says that the director just walked out on the cast one night in the early ’70s. So what do some greedy producers do when Chan finally becomes a star years later? They “finish” the film using a lame lookalike. I must admit to not watching the whole movie. The video version I rented had multiple endings, so I just fast-forwarded to them. Guess what? They were ALL lame. The Cannon Group made better movies than this. Heck, I could make a better movie with a personal camcorder. As MPM would say, this flick sucks chunks!

Alvin George’s Rating: 0/10

By Marcia Franklin

I must be a mutant, looking at everyone else’s reviews, because I actually liked this film. Of course, it was one of the first, oh, five or so Jackie flicks I ever saw, so maybe it’s because I didn’t have anything with which to compare. Also, I would wager that the version one sees has an impact on one’s reaction — “Master with Cracked Fingers” has the little boy stuff all at the beginning (where it actually makes sense), while “Snake Fist Fighter” throws it in as flashbacks during the climactic fight — eww. In comparison to other Jackie films, it’s far from great, but I found it to be, if nothing else, an interesting look at the young Jackie in his first starring role. Not great cinema, but likeable.

Marcia Franklin’s Rating: 6/10

By James H.

This here is Jackie very first starring role. Some say that it has a certain charm to it. I don’t think it does. “Snake in the Eagle’s Shadow” has a certain charm, this is just a bad kung fu movie from the early 70’s. It has the same plot as every other bad kung fu movie from the 70’s. The production of the “movie” must have cost about $109.95, with each actor receiving their $11.49 for their work.

I saw the “special edition” of the movie, which has three different endings. Each one is stupider than the last. In retrospect though, I’d rather watch this than “The Protector” because there were some parts that were so bad they were laughable, while “The Protector” was just so bad. If you do end up renting this, buy some batteries for the VCR clicker, you’ll need them after you run down the old ones from using the fast-forward button.

James H’s Rating: 2/10

By Cody

Like some other critics on this site have said, this movie has a special charm about it. I can’t really put my finger on it though. Other than that this movie is really nothing special. The acting is dull, the story is obviously a remake of Bruce Lee’s “The Big Boss”, Jackie is wearing far too much eye-liner, and then there’s the fight sequences that are copying Bruce Lee (my uncle came in while I was watching this movie and he thought he was seeing Bruce Lee). The worst thing about movie is probably Jackie’s teacher.

This scene will explain my opinion on him:

BUM: Whats wrong little boy, you look sad?
BABY JACKIE: I want to learn how to fight (why!) but my father won’t let me! (boo hoo, sniff sniff)
BUM: Well I’ll teach you if you …
BABY JACKIE: HAH! all your good for is beggin’
BUM: WHY I OUTTA’! Look at this, this is my magic stick (gross!). And I’m one of the greatest martial artists in the land.
BABY JACKIE: You wanna see fighting, well I’ll show you! (baby Jackie does some mantis kung fu, but he falls flat on his butt)
BUM: HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO!
BABY JACKIE: You better stop laghing or I’m gonna kick your @$$! (They start to “fight” Jackie loses)
BUM: So what do you think now, huh kid!
BABY JACKIE: TEACH ME!
BUM: Alright. Meet me in the woods tonight and come alone, or else! (later that night)
BABY JACKIE: I’m ready master.
BUM: Good, we’ll start by putting you in this full of magical poweres, but first you have to take off your clothes…

I stopped there because it was too sickening, you think about.

Cody’s Rating: 3/10

By Andrew

Not the best, and not the worst, but this is Chan’s first big picture, and it ain’t bad. Now it’s hard for me to say too much about the specifics of this fim, because I’ve seen two different versions and three alternate endings. (one of which wasn’t even an ending) I can say that there are different distinct parts of the film, and they are of varying effectiveness in conveying the overall story. So what is the story here? Of course the basic plot involves Chan growing up to someday fight to the death with the man who killed his father years before (don’t these guys get too old to fight?) but the real battle is for our hero’s moral values. Is it okay to fight, or must we only defend ourselves. Chan suffers terrible punishment from his step-father for defending others, but still knows that to avenge his fathers death he must fight his way up to the final confrontation. A young thief also must choose whether to help this noble young hero, or cooperate with the thugs who terrorize the village.

Ultimately, this is a mildly entertaining film, with the emphasis on comedy… or action. (depending on which edition you see)

Andrew’s Rating: 6/10

By Vic Nguyen

CRAP! I can’t believe I actually paid $.79 to rent this piece of crap! This is just another film made to cash in on Jackie’s rising popularity in America. Stay away from this film at all costs.

Vic Nguyen’s Rating: 0/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , |

Medallion, The | aka Highbinders (2003) Review

Posted on January 25, 2011 by JJ Bona
"The Medallion" Korean Theatrical Poster

“The Medallion” Korean Theatrical Poster

Director: Gordon Chan
Cast: Jackie Chan, Claire Forlani, Lee Evans, Julian Sands, Alexander Bao, Anthony Wong, Christy Chung, Johann Myers, John Rhys-Davies, Scott Adkins, Paul Andreovski, Nicola Berwick, Anthony Carpio
Running Time: 88 min.

By Reefer

Jackie Chan’s The Medallion is rare film. Rare, because its Jackie’s most CGI-enhanced film to date. Rare, because he actually has a make-out scene with his lovely co-star. And finally rare, because it suffers from an obvious lack of thought, despite employing no less than five credited screenwriters to finish it. Five writers!

The Medallion is also cursed with the mediocrity that made most of Chan’s other efforts (Mr. Nice Guy, The Tuxedo, First Strike, etc) flop like a cross-eyed mackerel. Mediocre, because Jackie fights… well nobody of any skill. Mediocre, because his Interpol agent sidekick’s character (Lee Evans) is totally ridiculous and absolutely unbelievable from beginning to end. Mediocre, because his love interest is again at least twenty years younger than him and no effort is made to explain the attraction. Mediocre, because Jackie is again playing himself and not a character. And finally mediocre, because the best laughs are found in the outtakes at the end of the film.

Jackie’s character Eddie Yang is a Hong Kong cop on the trail of ruthless smuggler, Snakehead (Julian Sands, in a role that signifies that his career is coming to an end). Along the way, Yang is teamed up with Watson (Evans) an Interpol agent with an Asian wife (Christy Chung) and an inferiority complex. Together with Chan’s ex-flame and fellow agent, Claire Forlani, they follow Snakehead to Dublin as the bad guy attempts to gain immortality from a mysterious medallion in the possession of a mystical young boy (think Golden Child). Well, through a chain of events, Yang is eventually given super powers and immortality but the other half of the trinket is acquired by the evil Snakehead and the battle is on.

Despite the presence of Opera school pal Sammo Hung as action director, these FX-laden battles unfortunately fail to impress. The problem is that somehow Chan was able to do things like leap six foot fences and scamper across the seats of parked bicycles before he gained super powers! Now his abilities are just exaggerated. He’s stronger. Faster. And furthermore, who cares about a battle between characters who are IMMORTAL! They cannot kill each other so its pretty much anticlimactic.

Like many people, I want Jackie to make good films again. In a recent interview, he expressed a desire to do dramas, love stories, comedies, and the like. To do this, he must overcome one thing. Himself. And comply to the vision of a director. Gordan Chan, a good director, is credited with directing the Medallion, but there doesn’t seem to be much of him in the final product. Instead, the audience gets more of what Jackie fans expect: Comic fights, lowbrow comedy, a good-natured hero, and some fun stunts. Bear in mind that this isn’t always a bad thing. You get the feeling that if Steven Spielberg directed Jackie there would still be slapstick, bad dubbing, a teenage girlfriend and a monster truck laying waste to all in sight before the hilarious outtakes.

Reefer’s Rating: 6/10

By Numskull

On the surface, this Jackie Chan/Gordon Chan collaboration looks like a boring, mindless, special effects shitfest.

Looks can be deceiving.

Upon closer inspection, with a more receptive attitude, The Medallion is, in actuality…

…a boring, mindless, special effects shitfest.

I said looks CAN BE deceiving. I didn’t say they ARE.

I’m not going to debate whether Jackie’s recent string of vapid filler movies is due to his desire to succeed in America or the ravages of time; one way or the other, the days of crazed ten-minute action scenes with competent adversaries are well and truly over. That doesn’t mean he still can’t make enjoyable films, but The Medallion merely illustrates how far the man has fallen in terms of the vigor he brings to the screen. I’m not so unrealistic as to expect another extravaganza like Project A at his age, but he can most definitely do better than this.

So, there’s a “chosen one” kid with mystic powers and a medallion (or, if you prefer, an amulet) which can grant immortality to the bearer and an evil British guy (“Snakehead”) who wants them for himself and blah blah blah. Perhaps the story was more interesting before Columbia TriStar took it upon themselves to decide that people would rather watch 75% of a movie instead of a whole one. Perhaps not. Either way, Julian Sands is a pretty non-threatening villain, and the fact that he tries to befriend Jackie’s character before their big “fight” (if the blur of special effects at the film’s climax can be referred to as such) doesn’t help matters. However, he’s still easier to stomach than Jackie’s partner Lee Evans, who keeps pointing his gun at statues; while watching his irritating style of overacting, all I could think about was the number of Ross Perot jokes he probably endured in the early ’90s. Then there’s Claire Forlani as The Woman, who was presumably hired because all the real actresses said no, and John Rhys-Davies in the role of an interpol boss, whose screen time is even shorter than Gimli. Or, hell, even Frodo. On the Asian side we have Christy Chung as Evans’s wife (must have an ear fetish), whose combative skills were probably explained in an excised scene, and Anthony Wong Chau-sang as an ally of Snakehead’s, whose dialogue is dubbed into English that isn’t any better than the English he speaks himself.

Uninvolving, FX-laden action scenes with small amounts of anemic hand-to-hand combat (Sammo Hung’s talents put to poor use) are scattered here and there, including a cat fight late in the game that brings back painful memories of Bulletproof Monk. The comedic highlight is Jackie suddenly telling Julian Sands “I want ice cream” in the outtakes (which, by the way, include numerous bits left out of the final cut, and show the original title, “Highbinders”, on the black and white clapping thingie that they put in front of the camera at the beginning of each take). If you want laughs while the film itself is in progress, you’re out of luck, unless you’re like the pack of obnoxious kids I had to share the theater with and you find humor in the “Three’s Company”-esque scene in which Chan and Evans accidentally lead some of the other interpol agents to believe that they’re a gay couple.

In conclusion: Bah. Another few months of a Hong Kong star’s time gone down the drain, and another 90 minutes and cost of a ticket wasted for us. (See also: Cradle 2 the Grave, Bulletproof Monk. Better yet, don’t.) Here’s hoping that Jackie gives up on special effects and goes back to disappointing us the old-fashioned way.

Numskull’s Rating: 3/10

Posted in Asian Related, Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Snake in the Eagle’s Shadow (1978) Review

Posted on January 24, 2011 by JJ Bona
"Snake in the Eagle's Shadow" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“Snake in the Eagle’s Shadow” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Yuen Woo Ping
Producer: Ng See Yuen
Cast: Jackie Chan, Chiang Kam, Simon Yuen, Hwang Jang Lee, Hsu Hsia, Dean Shek, Charlie Chan, Peter Chan, Chu Chi Ling, Fung King Man, Roy Horan
Running Time: 98 min.

By Ro

This one opens with Jackie performing an incredible kata. For the uninitiated – a kata is a series of kicks, blocks and punches aimed at invisible opponents. It’s carefully choreographed, with the emphasis on precision of form and timing. This one rocks! (And I know what I’m talking about – my sister, Maria (3 dan black belt) has a roomful of trophies for her katas) I wanted to kill whoever was responsible for running the credits over him as he performed! OK, now for the story – Jackie’s the supposedly simple- minded houseboy for a kung-fu school. They use him, quite literally, as a punching bag. He befriends an old man who teaches him the ‘Snakefist’ style of Kung Fu.

The rest of the story is inevitable. It’s been compared to The Karate Kid and the comparison is valid. The only difference is that when you see Jackie in the beginning, scrubbing floors in a sleeveless shirt, it’s hard to picture him being unable to kick their collective butts. It’s got a lot of humor in it, especially with Jackie trying to survive while still hiding his new talents, but the best parts for me were the training scenes. Watching him work out without the distraction of a fight is beauty in motion. The precision of his movements and clean lines are wonderful, like watching a world class ballet dancer rehearse! Breathtaking! Watch for him doing stomach crunches with his master sitting on his belly!! There are some negatives; the actual fighting looks more like a ‘how to’ video, in the typical style of the 70s, the pace is very slow. Also, there’s western music playing in the background and it just doesn’t fit the genre, the cat screeching sounds during the last fight are absurd and Jackie doesn’t dub his own voice in the version I saw. Despite all these negatives, this is one of his best early works and definitely worth a viewing!

Ro’s Rating: 7/10

By DJ Nixon

This was Jackie’s first big box-office hit and I think it was well deserved. A great 70’s film that had some good comedy and action in it. Jackie did a great job doing all the fights, and they all looked great. The Snake Fist was a great idea for Chan to invent and the how he combined that with the Cat’s Paw was cool (except for the cheesy cat sound effects). The plot was the same as all of his movies though, Jackie is a weak and beatup student and an old master comes along and teaches him kung-fu; the master ends up getting beaten up by a great kung-fu master; Jackie gets really angry and goes after the other master and fails the first time but beats him the second time; that is the basic plot of all of them. Good movies, except for the repeated-through-history plot.

DJ Nixon’s Rating: 8/10

By James H.

I wish I lived in a time and place where I could learn kung fu in a matter of minutes. That’s how long it took Jackie to learn it! An early Jackie Chan film. I’m not a really big fan of his early films, but this one was pretty good. The fight choreography was generally well done and well executed. There were plenty of fights, but the ones in the middle weren’t very exciting. The baddies were very cool and very familiar. I liked the Russian priest. The film was also very funny. My two favourite scenes were: the one were the old man is helping Jackie fight (near the beginning) and the scene were Jackie has to grab the bowl from the old man.

But with every up, there has to be a down. The sound effects were not in sync (maybe it has something to do with the doppler effect) and very annoying (the cat sounds!?! What the hell is up with that?). The music seemed like it was from a bad video game, actually some of the music during the fights was kind of frightening. They also stole some music from “From Russia With Love.” Oh and the dubbing was just like every other dubbed kung fu movie from the 70’s; corny and fun.

Overall it is quite good, with some good fights and light-hearted humour. Although I noticed a lot of people got kicked in the balls in the movie.

James H’s Rating: 6/10

By Rintor

SNAKE WARS: A NEW KUNG FU

A LONG TIME AGO, IN A CHINESE VILLAGE NOT SO FAR AWAY THE SNAKE FIST STYLE THRIVED AND GAINED MANY STUDENTS. THEN SUDDENLY AN EVIL KUNG FU MASTER CREATED THE EAGLE CLAW STYLE AND BEGIN TERRORIZING THE SNAKE FIST STUDENTS. THE EAGLE CLAW SUDENTS KILLED OVER 300 OF THE SNAKE FIST STUDENTS, AND ONLY TWO PEOPLE REMAINED WHO KNEW THE SNAKE FIST STYLE. EVENTUALLY AN OLD MAN TAUGHT THE SNAKE FIST STYLE TO A TROUBLED YOUNG BOY, CHIEN-FU. FOR CHIEN-FU WAS THE OLD MAN’s ONLY HOPE. COMBINING THE SNAKE FIST STYLE WITH A CAT CLAW TECHNIQUE CHIN FU DEFEATED THE EVIL DARK KUNG FU MASTER. THE NEW KUNG FU WOULD BE CALLED: SNAKE IN THE EAGLE’s SHADOW.

THE END.

Heh, I thought this movie could be done Star Wars style because of that Star Wars music that they borrow. This movie was great and I loved it. It’s a must see. (The only cheesy part was the cat hiss)

Rintor’s Rating: 8.5/10

By Dead Channel

Hah, yeah. An older Jackie Chan movie, I just bought this one (and saw as well) about a week ago. Was $6 with a nice cover (it’s the widescreen one) and I figured what the hell, I read nice reviews and heard good things so I’ll check it. As I am not too big a fan of his older movies (it seems like there is too much boring talk and other nonsense.. and not enough fighting.) I really enjoyed this movie. It wasn’t like the newer ones, where I can fucking rewind and play them back 3 times in a row, but it is still the jam. I was about to cry every time Jackie got embarrased or in trouble by his master, and he ran off crying. *sneef* But then of course a bit later (after learning his skills pretty quickly! see the other reviews for more info hahah) he starts kicking everybody’s ass, so I bust a hole in the wall with happiness (not really)…

Anyway, check this one out anyway, it’s worth a watch. Get the english dubbed version so you can catch the cheesy arse dialogue like.. “What style is that?” (Jackie) “Well, if you must know, it’s the praying mantis style!” (Perpetrator) “Well this is the snake fist style!” (Jackie) Hah! Fucking cool. I love it when the priest (or fake priest, unfortunatly) comes out “Please, don’t fight! You’re a sinner!” Blah blah, and the fucking guy smacks that bitch right in the face MUHAHAH! Ahem.. sorry.

Dead Channel’s Rating: 6/10

By Numskull

ERNEST HEMINGWAY SPECIAL! ONE TIME ONLY!!!

In an attempt to bring more widespread appreciation to great fiction, I shall compose this review in the spirit of the 19th century literary genius, Ernest Hemingway! Mr. Hemingway is to this day one of the most honored and respected writers the English language has ever known, and I certainly hope that this review, written in his brilliantly distinct style, illustrates why!!!

Jackie was the only man at the kung fu school who did not know how to fight. All of the others mocked him and ridiculed him and insulted him and made fun of him because he did not know how to fight. Because he did not know how to fight, Jackie was very sad. Because he was very sad, Jackie cried. Because he cried, Jackie made friends with a kindly old man. Then Jackie asked the old man, who was a Snake style master, to teach him how to fight. The old man said to Jackie: “Fighting can be dangerous. Wouldn’t you like me to teach you how to tap-dance instead?” “No,” said Jackie. “I don’t want to tap-dance. I want to punch and kick and jump and bite and chop and claw and scratch and head-butt and make an absolute jackass of myself by hissing like a cat.” Then the old man said, “Very well. I will teach you how to fight.” Then the old man taught jackie how to fight. Then he left.

Meanwhile, Jackie kept training. One day, it rained, but Jackie kept training. Then a man from another kung fu school showed up at the kung fu school that Jackie lived in and jackie made everybody else look incompetent by defeating the man from the other kung fu school who had showed up at the kung fu school that Jackie lived in. Then an Eagle style master saw Jackie win. Then he approached Jackie. Then he asked him where he had learned the Snake style. Jackie refused to tell him, but not until after remembering the old man telling him to keep their friendship a secret. Then, Jackie and the Eagle style master fought. Jackie lost and was very sad again. When the old man found out that the Eagle style master was after him, he ran away from the town. On the way to where he was going, there was a pond full of water. The old man looked at the surface of the water. His reflection was there. Then he kept running.

Back at the kung fu school that Jackie lived in, Jackie watched a cat kill a snake. Then Jackie ran off and killed a man disguised as a preacher. Then the Eagle style master caught up with the old man. Then they began to fight. Then the fight continued. Then Jackie showed up. Then he beat the Eagle style master with the same technique the cat had used to kill the snake a short while beforehand. Then the cook from the kung fu school showed up and told Jackie and the old man that he had served them poisoned tea. Then Jackie and the old man died. Then they fell to the ground. Then they got up off the ground, for they had actually not died.Then Jackie addressed the cook. “We do not like hot tea. We do not drink hot tea. We did not drink your hot tea, which you have just told us was poisoned. Now I shall kick your ass.”

Then Jackie kicked the ass of the very same cook who had served them the poisoned tea (which they had not drank, for the poisoned tea was hot, and they did not drink hot tea, including hot tea with poison in it). Then the old man congratulated him. “By fighting evil men such as these, you are fighting for the good of the world,” said the old man. Then he said, “The world is a fine place, and worth fighting for.” Then Jackie and the old man walked off-camera and were never seen or heard from again.

Jackie’s character in this movie was named Chien Fu. In French, that means “mad dog.” I find this extremely funny. Also, the scene where the preacher gets dragged into the whorehouse made me laugh till I just about pissed, but the rest is pretty unremarkable. Mad Dog didn’t even get to beat up his annoying master. That sucked!

P.S. I do hope you’re all capable of recognizing sarcasm when you read it.

Numskull’s Rating: 5/10

By Aloho

This is one of the first films of Jackie’s I have seen. I really liked it because of some comedy mixed in with some action. I was unfamilier with some of Jackie’s tone. So I really liked it at first. Then I saw about 15 more movies of his and so Snake died off. In most of Chan’s movies something is brilliant and unique. In Snake, a guy fights with a fan, which was then revamped in Young Master. Jackie is paired up with the old guy and Jackie fights Hwang Jang-lee. That was then improved in Drunken Master. I give this an extra point because some friends of mine enjoyed this flick while staying away from Chan’s movies released in America.

Aloho’s Rating: 6/10

By Andrew

Now here is a kung fu film with a good deal of action and comedy. True, it does get tiresome to see the same couple of actors attempting to provide comic relief, but this film was better than your average Lo Wei flick. I actually watched this one with my parents, and they enjoyed it. I thought the old style Kung Fu would seem too weird for them, but they laughed out loud at the “cat’s paw” technique!

Andrew’s Rating: 7/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , |
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