Mad Monkey Kung Fu (1979) Review

"Mad Monkey Kung Fu" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“Mad Monkey Kung Fu” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Liu Chia Liang
Writer: I Kuang
Cast: Hsiao Ho, Lau Kar Leung, Lo Lieh, Kara Hui, Ching Chu, San Sin, Lam Fai Wong, Lin Ke Ming, Chan Ling Wai, Wong Ching Ho, Cham Siu Hung
Running Time: 116 min.

By HKFanatic

This 1979 kung fu film starring Hsiao Ho and Lau Kar-leung is another minor masterpiece from the Shaw Brothers. At nearly two hours long, this movie stuffs in as much Monkey Fist-style martial arts as the audience can handle. Interestingly enough, this film was released the same year as Golden Harvest’s Yuen Biao vehicle “Knockabout,” which also prominently featured the Monkey form of kung fu. Both films exemplify their studios’ very different approach to making a martial arts picture. Now if you held me at swordpoint I’d have to confess that I prefer “Knockabout” but, hey, there’s no reason that fighting fans shouldn’t go out of their way to see both flicks.

Hsiao Ho was only 21 years-old when he took the starring role in “Mad Monkey Kung Fu.” He would later go on to become a contract player for the Shaw Brothers and star in numerous films such as “Legendary Weapons of China” and “My Young Auntie.” A talented performer, in “Mad Monkey Kung Fu” Hsiao displays his gift for both acting and martial arts. Beyond his skills as a fighter, his sheer athleticism is jaw-dropping: the guy does more somersaults in this flick than I’ve seen anyone do in my life.

Lau Kar-leung is arguably more well known as a director than an actor but here he takes a turn in front of the camera too. One thing I really like about “Mad Monkey Kung Fu” is that it’s one of the rare films where you get to see the master fight alongside the student. And since Kar-leung was still fairly young when he made this movie, he and Hsiao seem more like partners than teacher and student at the end. They make for one dynamic fighting duo.

The plot, like many Shaw Brothers movies, is concerned with revenge but also tosses in several unpredictable twists and turns. Animal lovers be warned that there’s one scene of violence against an animal that comes out of nowhere, and is quite realistic and difficult to stomach. Shaw Brothers movies are famous for their intense training sequences and “Mad Monkey Kung Fu” is no exception. There’s got to be a solid 30 minutes of martial arts training interspersed throughout this film. At the very least, these sequences are certainly unconventional, with Hsiao Ho forced to tie rocks to his wrists and sleep in the trees like a monkey.

It’s also a treat when Hsiao Ho and Lau Kar-leung spar against each other. You can tell that Kar-leung has years of experience on Hsiao but the young pupil still manages to keep up. The gorgeous-beyond-belief Kara Hui is on hand in a supporting role but she doesn’t get to do much except say “Brother!” in Cantonese about thirty times.

What I like about Monkey-style kung fu is that it tends to combine humor with martial arts without being obnoxious about it. The comedy always flows out of the fighting style itself, which is admittedly over the top. I enjoyed all the references to the Monkey King too. And while “Mad Monkey Kung Fu” explores the light-hearted element that comes with the monkey territory, the plot features plenty of tragedy too – more so than your usual Shaw Brothers film. In fact, the story can be downright depressing at times. But at least the finale is a rousing showstopper where the villains get what they deserve. Would you expect anything less from the Shaw Brothers? I don’t know if I’d put this film up there with “The 36th Chamber of Shaolin” but if you like Lau Kar-leung or the other actors involved, it’s definitely a must see.

HKFanatic’s Rating: 7.5/10


By Perkele

No question, Liu Chia Liang is one of the greatest kung fu directors of all time. His work had had an influence on the genre that only a selected few can equal. All-time classics such as “Executioners from Shaolin”, “Legendary Weapons of Kung Fu” and most importantly “The 36th Chamber of Shaolin” are definite milestones in HK cinema. So “Mad Monkey Kung Fu” can’t be a bad either, and it really is not.

It’s an epic showcase for Liu Chia Liang and, even more, for his protégé Siu Hou. The story is interesting, martial artistry pure excellence and it has the best training sequences ever captured on film! Liu himself is nothing but great as the crippled Monkey Fist master, but lets the awesome acrobatic Siu Hou steal almost the whole movie with his prefect monkey impression. Hell, these guys can move more like a monkey than a monkey itself! Acrobatics even overshadow the actual kung fu in a few scenes, making it look like some circus show (not so often thought that it could be consider as a bad thing). BUT (and that’s a major BUT) the fucking comedy sucks! Almost 80 % of the film’s fights have Siu Hou ‘fooling around’.

You know, after every fancy, perfectly executed kung fu move the action suddenly stops, bad guys pretend to be locked in ailing positions (while they easily could get loose or at least do something else than just make agony-filled faces), and then Siu Ho says (with an annoying dubbed voice) something like “Hey you guys are really stupid! And dumb too!” after which he hits them with an umbrella and the baddies back up to rub their wounds whining “We’ll fix you, you prick!” or something like that, you got the idea.

These irritating and idiotic ‘comedic touches’ nearly ruined the film for me so I was relieved when the final beating of Lo Lieh was almost dead serious. Lo Lieh? Well he’s that evil dude who was beaten by drunken Liu in the opening sequence, so Lo Lieh forced Liu’s sister (the ever-lovely Hui Ying-Hung) into prostitution and crippled his hands (which was in my opinion just a random revenge for the exact same kind of treatment HE received in the 1972’s classic “Five Fingers of Death”). After Liu’s misfortune continues and his pet monkey gets killed, he adopts a cheap substitute monkey imitator dude, Siu Hou, to whom he teaches kung fu. Revenge? You guessed it.

Perkele’s Rating: 7/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , |

Giorgio Moroder Presents Metropolis: Special Edition Blu-ray & DVD (Kino)

Giorgio Moroder Presents Metropolis: Special Edition Blu-ray/DVD (Kino)

Giorgio Moroder Presents Metropolis: Special Edition Blu-ray/DVD (Kino)

RELEASE DATE: November 15, 2011

In 1984, Giorgio Moroder, a music producer who specialized in soundtracks for motion pictures (Scarface, Midnight Express), made his own edit of Fritz Lang’s 1926 film (he included scenes which were deleted from the original release). The features songs performed by Pat Benatar, Billy Squier, Jon Anderson, Adam Ant, Bonnie Tyler, Freddie Mercury and Loverboy. Check out the trailer here.

Special Features:

”The Fading Image” Produced by Giorgio Moroder, this rare 1984 short subject documentary chronicles Moroder’s restoration of Metropolis (never before available on any home video format and not seen in 27 years), The Original Theatrical Trailer, Photo Gallery, and a special liner notes introduction written by Giorgio Moroder in 2011 for this special edition. New 5.1 audio mix (in addition to the original 2.0 stereo mix)

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Tactical Force (2011) Review

"Tactical Force" American DVD Cover

“Tactical Force” American DVD Cover

Director: Adamo Paolo Cultraro
Cast: “Stone Cold” Steve Austin, Michael Jai White, Candace Elaine, Lexa Doig, Steve Bacic, Michael Shanks, Michael Eklund, Darren Shahlavi
Running Time: 90 min.

By HKFanatic

If you rent a movie with “Stone Cold” Steven Austin dead center on the cover, you probably know what you’re in for. There’s gonna be low production values, Stone Cold is gonna spout off a few one-liners like “You can run but you can’t hide, sunshine” and wrassle a few bad guys, and then the credits are gonna roll. Expectations met, right?

But it’s a different story with “Tactical Force,” the 2011 direct-to-video action movie from Buena Vista. Glance at the cover again and you’ll notice that martial artist and actor extraordinaire Michael Jai White (“Never Back Down 2: The Beatdown,” “Blood and Bone“) receives second billing after Stone Cold. In addition, another great martial arts movie star, Darren Shahlavi (“Bloodmoon” and the British boxer in “Ip Man 2“), is in the cast. All of a sudden expectations are raised. Both White and Shahlavi have talent to burn; they’re amazingly skilled fighters and, with the right camera angles and choreography, they could easily deliver a fight scene for the ages. Might “Tactical Force” turn out to be a fun, guilty pleasure direct-to-video flick with just enough over-the-top action to make fans happy?

Sadly, no. “Tactical Force” is what happens when you have plenty of talent in front of the camera but no talent behind the camera. The film was written and directed by Adamo P. Cultaro, who has one previous feature length credit to his name – a Tom Sizemore movie called “Bad Ass” from 2009. I can’t really mince words: Cultaro stages scenes like a NBC sitcom and constantly undermines what could have been a good action movie with pedestrian camera angles. Way too much of the runtime is eaten up by filler content, like endless shots of SWAT team members and the bad guys going up or down stairs.

Worse than the directing is the editing, which was done by no less than three people. The editing constantly draws attention to itself with eye-straining “flashbulb” style transitions from scene to scene or aggressive screen wipes. They also commit the unforgivable sin of frequently cutting away from Michael Jai White and Darren Shahlavi’s big fight scene, which doesn’t occur until over an hour into the film. Filmmakers, please. If you tell a good story and deliver solid fight scenes, you won’t need to rely on flashy editing to make your film feel “edgy” or “modern.”

Michael Jai White has already publicly distanced himself from “Tactical Force” on Twitter, saying he’s happy if fans enjoy it but personally he disagreed with the direction of the film. Granted, I don’t blame him one bit but I wonder how a script this hokey got so many decent action stars to sign up for it. As a screenwriter, Cultaro mistakes profanity for poetry and peppers the dialogue with nonstop f-bombs. Maybe he was hoping that the sight of well-dressed criminals cursing in a warehouse would recall “Reservoir Dogs,” but there’s so much more to Tarantino’s language than dirty words.

There’s always the chance that the cast was roped in by the film’s simple but effective premise – a weapon-less SWAT team trapped in a warehouse with warring criminals – that recalls “Assault on Precinct 13.” But it’s difficult for the plot to generate momentum when it’s continually stalled by the self-serving monologues that the criminal characters always seem to give. I understand a low-budget film is hard-pressed to come up with any action scenes at all, but killing time with two or three villain speeches is one or two too many. Not even Bond bad guys wax philosophical this much.

I never could get into wrestling except for a few 16-bit WWF video games back in the heyday of Hulk Hogan and Jake the Snake, so the appeal of Steve Austin has always been lost on me. That said, he’s pretty funny in this movie. His delivery of normal dialogue is wooden at best but he knows how to talk shit, which I can always respect. “Who the hell are these guys?!” one of his men asks when the SWAT team comes under attack. “I don’t know but they’re fuckin’ dead,” Stone Cold replies matter-of-factly, like the villain’s deaths are already carved in stone.

Michael Jai White and the rest of the cast do their best to look good despite being saddled with some dumb lines. Poor Darren Shahlavi is an English actor playing an Italian gangster so his accent is all over the place during the entire film. “Tactical Force” is actually not the first time White and Shahlavi have faced each other; they had a fight in the initial episode of the “Mortal Kombat: Legacy” web series, in which White was the character Jax and Shahlavi played his rival Kano. After fans expressed disappointment at their battle, it was revealed that the entire production was on a rushed schedule and White was sick during filming.

Their fight in “Tactical Force” isn’t bad but it’s crippled by spastic editing, so fans are still left waiting for the definitive clash between the these two martial arts titans. Imagine if “Ip Man” director Wilson Yip flew to America to shoot a movie where Michael Jai White and Darren Shahlavi were able to square off with the kind of quality choreography, directing, and editing that such a fight deserves. Hey, I can dream, can’t I?

“Tactical Force” is a movie that is less than the sum of its actors. It proves you can have two of the most talented onscreen martial artists around – as Michael Jai White and Darren Shahlavi surely are – and the movie still won’t work if you don’t have the right filmmaking talent. You need a competent director able to evoke good performances and deliver the action onscreen in a compelling manner. Here a hokey script and amateur directing, both sloppily put together in the editing room, mean that “Tactical Force” loses what luster it might have had as a guilty pleasure DTV flick.

HKFanatic’s Rating: 4/10

Posted in Asian Related, Reviews | Tagged , , , |

Friday the 13th: The Ultimate Collection 8-Disc Limited Edition DVD Set (Paramount)

Friday the 13th: The Ultimate Collection 8-Disc Limited Edition DVD Set (Paramount)

Friday the 13th: The Ultimate Collection 8-Disc Limited Edition DVD Set (Paramount)

RELEASE DATE: October 4, 2011

I say this boxed set is worth it for Friday the 13th Part 6 alone! The best of the series no doubt! Even the trailer is a masterpiece.

This Limited Edition set (50,000 numbered copies) will contain the Deluxe Editions of FRIDAY THE 13TH (Uncut) through FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VIII: JASON TAKES MANHATTAN. Each movie will be packed with new extra features (including two pairs of 3D glasses for Part 3), a replica of Jason’s hockey mask and an 8-page Collector’s Booklet.

FRIDAY THE 13TH Uncut: Audio commentary by director Sean S. Cunningham with cast and crew, “Fresh Cuts: New Tales from FRIDAY THE 13TH”, “The Man Behind the Legacy: Sean S. Cunningham”, “FRIDAY THE 13TH Reunion”, “Lost Tales from Camp Blood—Part 1”, Theatrical trailer

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2: Inside “Crystal Lake Memories”, “FRIDAY’s Legacy: Horror Conventions”, “Lost Tales from Camp Blood—Part 2”, “Jason Forever”, Theatrical trailer

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 3: 3D version of the film (with glasses), Theatrical trailer

FRIDAY THE 13TH: THE FINAL CHAPTER: Audio commentary by director Joseph Zito, screenwriter Barney Cohen and editor Joel Goodman, Fan commentary by Adam Green and Joe Lynch, “Lost Tales from Camp Blood—Part 4”, Slashed scenes, “Jason’s Unlucky Day: 25 Years After FRIDAY THE 13TH: THE FINAL CHAPTER”, “The Lost Ending”, “The Crystal Lake Massacres Revisited Part I”, “Jimmy’s Dead Dance Moves”, Theatrical trailer

Just think... you can wear the mask and the 3-D glasses at the same time!

Just think... you can wear the mask and the 3-D glasses at the same time!

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART V: A NEW BEGINNING: Audio commentary by director/co-screenwriter Danny Steinmann with cast and crew, “Lost Tales from Camp Blood—Part 5”, “The Crystal Lake Massacres Revisited Part II”, “New Beginnings: The Making of FRIDAY THE 13th PART V: A NEW BEGINNING”, Theatrical trailer

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VI: JASON LIVES: Audio commentary by director Tom McLoughlin with cast and crew, “Lost Tales from Camp Blood—Part 6”, “The Crystal Lake Massacres Revisited Part III”, “Jason Lives: The Making of FRIDAY THE 13th PART VI: JASON LIVES”, “Meeting Mr. Voorhees”, Slashed scenes, Theatrical trailer

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VII: THE NEW BLOOD: Audio commentary by director John Carl Buechler and actors Lar Park Lincoln and Kane Hodder, “Jason’s Destroyer: The Making of FRIDAY THE 13th PART VII: THE NEW BLOOD”, “Mind Over Matter: The Truth About Telekinesis”, “Makeover by Maddy: Need a Little Touch-Up Work, My Ass”, Slashed scenes intro, Slashed scenes, Theatrical trailer

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VIII: JASON TAKES MANHATTAN: Audio commentary by actors Scott Reeves, Jensen Daggett and Kane Hodder, “New York Has a New Problem: The Making of FRIDAY THE 13th PART VIII: JASON TAKES MANHATTAN”, Gag reel, Slashed scenes, Theatrical trailer

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Shaolin Temple 3 | aka Martial Arts of Shaolin (1986) Review

"Martial Arts of Shaolin" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“Martial Arts of Shaolin” Chinese Theatrical Poster

AKA: Shaolin North & South
Director: Lau Kar-leung
Cast: Jet Li, Wong Chau Yin, Hu Jian Qiang, Yu Cheng Hui, Yu Hai, Sun Jian Kui, Ji Chun Hua, Mak Wai Cheung, Wong Kwong-Kuen, Hu Mei-Jie
Running Time: 89 min.

By HKFanatic

Released in 1986, “Martial Arts of Shaolin” is the latest era Shaw Brothers film I’ve yet to see. I’m not an expert on the Shaw Brothers like many City on Fire staff members and readers are, but I believe it was at this point that the studio was making their eventual transition into television work. “Martial Arts of Shaolin” trades their usual studio-bound filmmaking style for location shooting. The production values take something of a hit as a result but instead of Shaw Brothers’ surreal-looking sets we get to marvel at the natural beauty of Hong Kong, so I’d say it’s a fair trade off. Interestingly enough, the first two “Shaolin Temple” movies were funded and made in Mainland China. For this film, part three in the series, Jet Li returns but the production moves to Hong Kong. Behind the camera is Lau Kar-leung, the legendary director of “36th Chamber of Shaolin” and “Drunken Master II” (he butted heads with Jackie Chan while making the latter). This would be his only collaboration with Jet.

“Martial Arts of Shaolin” is very nearly a classic Hong Kong movie of its decade but is undone by a few elements. The soundtrack is extremely corny and unfitting of the film; it plays the same exact same melody throughout the entire movie, just in different arrangements. Imagine schmaltzy, synth-y 80’s Cantopop played over intense Shaolin training exercises and you’ll get an idea of why the music doesn’t fit the film at all. It’s a shame.

The plot is your typical quest for revenge, only we don’t know the motivation behind the revenge until the movie is almost over. Characters keep trying to take the life of Lord He Suo and yet the audience doesn’t really know why. We figure he must be evil and deserving of death since he keeps stroking his beard and laughing maniacally like your typical Shaw Brothers baddie, but that’s about as far as the viewer’s immersion in the plot goes. I’m all for a classic revenge story well-told but you have to at least make me want to the bad guy to get his just deserts. In “Martial Arts of Shaolin,” you’re left to wonder why you should care until it’s nearly over.

Fortunately, this movie has a secret weapon: a 23 year-old Jet Li, at the the peak of his athletic prowess. Jet gives an earnest, wide-eyed performance and shows off his incredible martial arts skills. Even during dialogue scenes, Jet Li and his costar Hu Jianqiang are constantly moving. These guys are practically leaping off the screen with energy and enthusiasm! Whenever the two of them spar, it’s a joy to watch because as good as Jet Li is, Hu Jianqiang appears to be his equal. The way their Southern (Jet Li) and Northern (Hu Jianqiang) Shaolin styles clash is one of the highlights of the film.

The action scenes in “Martial Arts of Shaolin” are plentiful and extend far past the point where you’d think everyone involved would be exhausted (I know I was worn out just watching them). The finale on the evil Lord’s boat is a showstopper but the battle in and around a military checkpoint is great too. Bonus points for the scene where the Abbot of the Shaolin Temple shows up to smack a bad guy off a cliff and declares, “I’ll send you to Heaven!”

Jet Li utilizes several weapons throughout the film, like swords and bos, but also you do have to endure an extended scene of him in drag pretending to be a woman. Yeah, “Martial Arts of Shaolin” features a few forced attempts at comedy like that. And a lot of screentime is eaten up by a traditional Chinese dance celebration in the Lord’s court. Now I’m all for a classic Chinese lion dance, especially when Jet Li is playing part of the lion, but he’s barely the focus here. Instead it’s some lady performer who has nothing to do with the plot and is never seen again. It’s hard to tell if this whole segment is a tribute to Chinese dance or just a way to pad out the film’s runtime.

Overall, “Martial Arts of Shaolin” is worth a watch for Jet Li fans since you get to see the actor when he was first emerging as a star, fresh-faced and lightning fast. After about 30 minutes of training sequences, the excellently-choreographed battles kick in and rarely let up. Just be prepared to cringe whenever you hear that familiar music cue. Na na na na naaa…

HKFanatic’s Rating: 7.5/10


By Kenneth T.

I think this movie goes hand and hand with “Odd Couple,” “Legendary Weapons of Kung Fu,” and any other ‘weapons’ titles. I don’t think it was originally intended for it to be one, but Jet Li uses a ton of weapons in this film: Spears, double broadswords, tai chi swords, staffs (mainly), three sectional staffs and a little bit of rope darts.

The first 2 minutes of the movie makes you think it’ll be shit because Li starts off by punching the hell out of this tree; he had to have punched it like 300 times in a minute. Then it goes into a couple of really good training scenes where Li shows of his staff skills and how acrobatic he really is. From then on it’s non-stop action.

The big scene at the ruler’s party has a lot of acrobatics and a phenomenal fight were all, except Li, show off their skills. The final fight scene is the best fight in the whole movie. Bottom line: This is the best “Shaolin Temple” movie of all three and I suggest you watch the others first.

Kenneth T’s Rating: 9/10 (only reason for the 9 instead of 10 is because of the really annoying music that it plays throughout the whole movie.)

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , |

Evil Dead 2: 25th Anniversary Editon Blu-ray/DVD (Lionsgate)

Evil Dead 2: 25th Anniversary Editon Blu-ray/DVD (Lionsgate)

Evil Dead 2: 25th Anniversary Editon Blu-ray/DVD (Lionsgate)

RELEASE DATE: November 15, 2011

Sam Raimi’s cult horror-comedy classic is now available on Bluray from Lionsgate with new special features!

Ash (Bruce Campbell), the sole survivor of THE EVIL DEAD, returns to the same cabin in the woods and again unleashes the forces of the dead. With his girlfriend possessed by the demons and his body parts running amok, Ash is forced to single- handedly battle the legions of the damned as the most lethal – and groovy – hero in horror movie history!

Welcome to EVIL DEAD II, director Sam Raimi’s infamous sequel to THE EVIL DEAD and outrageous prequel to ARMY OF DARKNESS! Also starring Sarah Berry, Dan Hicks, Kassie Wesley, Richard Domeier. Check out the original 1987 trailer.

Special Features:

• Audio commentary with cast/crew- NEW
• “Swallowed Souls: The Making of Evil Dead II” documentary – NEW
• “Road to Wadesboro: The Location of Evil Dead II” featurette – NEW
• “Cabin Fever: Behind the Scenes of Evil Dead II” featurette – NEW
• Video/still gallery archives of marketing materials, production photos, special effects, animation and more – NEW
• Archival featurettes, footage, galleries, TV spots and more…

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Fist 2 Fist aka Hand 2 Hand DVD (Screen Media)

Fist 2 Fist aka Hand 2 Hand DVD (Screen Media)

Fist 2 Fist aka Hand 2 Hand DVD (Screen Media)

RELEASE DATE: November 15, 2011

Fist 2 Fist (aka Hand 2 Hand) is the story about Ken Min (Jino Kang), a man who is given a chance to atone for an act of cowardice performed in his youth. This low budget feature is directed by and starring Jino Kang (7th Degree Black Belt in Hapkido) and starring Bill Duff (former NFL player and co-host of Human Weapon). Check out the trailer here.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Martial Arts Titles |

Dr. Wai in the Scripture Without Words (1996) Review

"Dr. Wai in the Scripture Without Words" Theatrical Poster

“Dr. Wai in the Scripture Without Words” Theatrical Poster

Director: Ching Siu-tung
Cast: Jet Li, Rosamund Kwan, Charlie Young, Kaneshiro Takeshi, Law Kar Ying, Billy Chow Bei Lei, Collin Chou, Johnnie Kong Yeuk Sing
Running Time: 91 min. 

By Numskull

Holy crap, what a waste. Of time, of money, of energy, of potential. This could have been a remarkable action-adventure with a scope the width of which is rarely seen in Hong Kong cinema. Instead, it’s just ninety yawn-inducing minutes pasted together in a fashion that tries to accomplish too much with too little.

Jet Li plays both a pulp adventure story writer and his own creation: The King of Adventurers, a thrill-seeker clearly inspired by Indiana Jones, but with more of a roguish streak. Jet the writer is married to a bitchy, unfaithful woman named Monica who wants a divorce, and it’s hurting his productivity. While the hostility between them intensifies, the latest chapter in the ongoing King of Adventurers saga is written by Jet, two of his co-workers, and Monica herself. A story being told in installments by several people with differing viewpoints on how it should progress is a pretty cool idea, but the stylistic differences amongst the various writers aren’t significant enough for this premise to be used to full effect. As the writing reins are passed from one hack to the next, most of The King of Adventurers’s universe remains unchanged, and the viewer will be hard pressed to give a damn whether he and his traveling companions find The Scripture With No Words or not.

Much of the movie’s fictional portion (it’s ALL fiction, of course, but I mean the part that’s fictional to the “real” characters) revolves around a mystic box that emits a light which roasts people alive when opened. Hmm…didn’t I see something like that in a more substantial movie? Ah yes, it was Raiders of the Lost Ark. This film could use a few of those melting Nazis to liven things up.

The movie is rife with anemic, emotionless fight scenes, with the only cool part being the electric fence bit during the battle against the ninjas. There are also cheesy special effects peppered throughout its duration, like the dog-rat creature and the flaming whip-swords. Dialogue gems include “I love to be a pile of shit” and, in one scene, a length of train track leads directly into a row of buildings. Later, Dr. Wai and his buddies drop onto the Great Wall of China…which is over 3600 miles/6000 kilometers in length…and just happen to land on the section containing the ONE secret brick that unlocks the vault wherein the coveted scripture lies. Worst of all is the romance factor, both inside and outside the King of Adventurers story.

Pretty much the only good thing that can be said for this film is that its unusual structure wasn’t a half bad idea. However, the execution is limp-wristed at best, and some people may not like the fact that those portions of the movie where the lion’s share of the action lies aren’t “really” happening.

Oh yeah, and the Mei Ah DVD has no menus of any kind. The package says you can choose Cantonese or Mandarin, but that’s a load of shit. And so is this movie.

Numskull’s Rating: 3/10

Posted in All, Chinese, News, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , , |

Infernal Affairs Blu-ray (Lionsgate)

Infernal Affairs Blu-ray (Lionsgate)

Infernal Affairs Blu-ray (Lionsgate)

RELEASE DATE: November 15, 2011

Chan Wing Yan (Tony Leung) is a hard-nosed veteran cop sent undercover to infiltrate the notorious Triad crime ring. An expert at bringing down violent syndicates, Chan thinks it’s going to be a routine mission.

What he’s not prepared for is the discovery that the Triad’s boss (Eric Tsang) has planted a mole (Andy Lau) in the police department… and now Chan is being hunted down. In this battle of wills, only one cop can win! Check out the trailer here.

Directed by Andrew Lau, Alan Mak and starring Tony Leung, Andy Lau, Anthony Wong, Eric Tsang

Special Features:

• Alternate Ending
• “Confidential File” – A Behind-the-Scenes Look at Infernal Affairs
• The Making of Infernal Affairs
• Theatrical Trailers
• Language/Subtitles: English, English Subtitles, Spanish Subtitles, Cantonese, English SDH
• Audio: 5.1 DTS-HD MA

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases |

Martial Arts Action DVD: The Head Hunter/Champ Against Champ/Dragon Lee vs. Five Brothers (Image)

Martial Arts Action DVD: The Head Hunter/Champ Against Champ/Dragon Lee vs. Five Brothers (Image)

Martial Arts Action DVD: The Head Hunter/Champ Against Champ/Dragon Lee vs. Five Brothers (Image)

RELEASE DATE: November 8, 2011

This triple feature contains: The Head Hunter (aka Hunting Head, Killer In Love, The Long Good Bye ), a 1983 Chow Yun Fat film; Champ Against Champ, starring Dragon Lee; and Dragon Lee vs. Five Brothers, again, starring Dragon Lee (in case you missed it in the title). Most, if not all, of these titles have been released before by various budget labels. Please note that these films are most likely full screen, and not 16×9 enhanced.

Trailers/Clips: The Head Hunter | Champ Against Champ | Dragon Lee vs Five Brothers

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Martial Arts Titles |

Hitman | aka Contract Killers (1998) Review

"Hitman" Theatrical Poster

“Hitman” Theatrical Poster

Director: Stephen Tung Wai
Cast: Jet Li, Eric Tsang, Simon Yam, Gigi Leung, Keiji Sato, Paul Ropovshi, Frankie Ng, Jude Poyer, Deon Lam Dik On, Sam Wong Shum, John Ching Tung
Running Time: 104 min.

By Numskull

A very welcome change of pace for Jet Li, Hitman features no flying around on wires or other stupid Hong Kong action tricks, unless you count the bad guy who blinds people with light from the rings on his fingers. Let’s not.

Jet Li’s character is a poor mama’s boy from mainland China who finds work…and unprecedented wealth…as a hired hitman (bet you couldn’t figure that out from the title). Eric Tsang skillfully plays his sleazy, Hollywoodesque “agent” who buys him snappy outfits and shows him the ropes; a far cry from “Roundhead” of Lucky Stars fame. His tall, long-legged attorney daughter Kiki (Gigi Leung) doesn’t need snappy outfits to catch the eye and is getting fed up with his wrong-side-of-legal shenanigans, although her significant other David doesn’t seem to mind shelling out bail money time and again. Much of the film revolves around a righteous killer nicknamed “The Killing Angel” whose true identity is a mystery; Simon Yam has a supporting role as a detective who gives our hapless anti-heroes a hard time about their possible connection(s) to the assassin.

There are well-acted, serious moments (mostly with Tsang and Leung), but also some bursts of comedic relief, like Jet Li chasing a runaway $5 coin near the beginning. A lengthy lull in the action brings the middle of the film down a bit, but a really cool sequence in an elevator shaft and a climactic battle involving six characters wrap things up on a high note.

Columbia/TriStar has purchased distribution rights to this film and (as of this writing) intends to release it dubbed only as Contract Killers. I wonder if they’ll cut out the shot of the woman with the Mickey Mouse shirt in the grocery store? I’m tempted to say I hope so…

This is definitely one of Jet Li’s better Hong Kong movies. Better than any of that Wong Jing shit, that’s for sure. Check it out, unaltered only.

Numskull’s Rating: 7/10

Posted in All, Chinese, News, Reviews | Tagged , , , , , |

Arena DVD (Sony)

Arena DVD (Sony)

Arena DVD (Sony)

RELEASE DATE: October 11, 2011

David Lord (Kellan Lutz of “Eclipse”) finds himself forced into the savage world of a modern gladiatorial arena, where men fight to the death for the entertainment of the online masses. Also starring Samuel L. Jackson (“Shaft”), James Remar (“48 Hrs”) and Daniel Dae Kim (“Lost”). Check out the trailer here.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Martial Arts Titles |

Sonny Chiba Double Feature DVD: The Streetfighter/Return of the Street Fighter (Image)

Artwork Coming Soon.

Artwork Coming Soon.

RELEASE DATE: November 8, 2011

This cult film and its sequels and thought to be particular favorites of American director Quentin Tarantino. Terry is a tough mercenary of martial arts. When an important business magnate dies, leaving billions to his daughter, the Mafia and Yakuza try to hire Terry to kidnap the daughter. Please note that these films are most likely full screen, and not 16×9 enhanced.

Trailers/Clips: The Streetfighter | Return of the Street Fighter

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Martial Arts Titles |

Ninja Assassins 2-Disc 15 Film DVD Set (Image)

Artwork Coming Soon.

Artwork Coming Soon.

RELEASE DATE: November 15, 2011

Most, if not all, of these titles have been released before by various budget labels. Films in this set include: Black Dragon, Sister Street Fighter, Ninja Turf, The Clones of Bruce Lee, Tattoo Connection, Dragon Princess, Head Hunter, Kung Fu Fever, Chinese Hercules, The Bodyguard, Fists of Bruce Lee, Kung Fu the Punch of Death, Breathing Fire, Screaming Ninja. Please note that these films are most likely full screen, and not 16×9 enhanced.

Trailers/Clips: Black Dragon | Sister Street Fighter | Ninja Turf | The Clones of Bruce Lee | Tattoo Connection | Dragon Princess | Head Hunter | Chinese Hercules | The Bodyguard | Kung Fu the Punch of Death | Breathing Fire

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Martial Arts Titles |

Street Fighters 4 Film DVD Set (Image)

Artwork Coming Soon.

Artwork Coming Soon.

RELEASE DATE: November 8, 2011

These titles have been released before by various budget labels. Bruce Lee Fights Back from the Grave, The Crippled Masters, The 36 Crazy Fists, Kung Fu the Punch of Death. Please note that these films are most likely full screen, and not 16×9 enhanced.

Trailers/Clips: Bruce Lee Fights Back from the Grave | The Crippled Masters | The 36 Crazy Fists | Kung Fu the Punch of Death

Posted in Asian Titles, Martial Arts Titles, News |