Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic (1990) Review

“Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic” Korean Theatrical Poster

Director: Taylor Wong Tai Loy
Cast: Andy Lau, Nat Chan Pak Cheung, Yuen Wah, Joey Wong, Cutie Mui Siu Wai, Lau Shun, Walter Tso Tat Wah, Chen Jing, San Kuai, Lee Hang, Mama Hung
Running Time: 99 min.

By Paul Bramhall

Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic is one of those movies that I remember constantly reading about back when I was first getting into the genre in the late 90’s and early 00’s. Perhaps the reason why it stuck in the memory is that every review or feature in which it got mentioned would make a point of saying how there was no kung fu or acrobatics in said movie, regardless of the title. Being in the midst of the kung fu frenzy that I was back then, such statements essentially guaranteed I was never going to check it out. But what can I say, times change, we grow older, become more mellow, and suddenly you see a movie that features Andy Lau and Yuen Wah facing off against each other in an early 90’s Hong Kong movie and think – how bad can it be!? 

Let’s address the elephant in the room straight away, all of those reviews were right, for the most part there really is no kung fu or acrobatics. Power poses, animated energy blasts, and gravity defying leaps are in plentiful supply, but for anyone who clocks into movies expecting them to do exactly what they say on the tin, much like with Golden Swallow, here only disappointment would await. With that out of the way, the question of course is what type of movie is Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic if it doesn’t come with the kind of awe inspiring feats of physicality that many Hong Kong cinema fans would expect from such a title.

At its core, director Taylor Wong has crafted a modern-day homage to the black and white Chinese fantasy flicks of yesteryear, where rudimentary (at least by 90’s standards) animated overlays would signal the arrival of superpowered swordsmen or villains. The opening credits even play out over scenes from the Buddha’s Palm series of movies that were released throughout 1964 and 1965, giving some indication as to what we can expect. Interestingly, director Wong payed homage much more directly with his 1982 sophomore feature Buddha’s Palm, a zany remake made at the Shaw Brothers studio that remains a firm favorite of the studio’s twilight output.

In-between his remake of Buddha’s Palm and Kung Fu Vs. Acrobat Wong became a solid if unremarkable director, the kind whose movies are remembered more for the actors that starred in them than any directorial flair. He collaborated with superstar Chow Yun Fat several times in 1987 for Tragic Hero, Rich and Famous, and Spiritual Love (notably reuniting with him one last time in 1989 for Triads: The Inside Story). A similar partnership took shape with Andy Lau, kicking off with 1988’s The Truth and Law and Justice, followed up by 1989’s Stars and Roses. In addition to Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic, in 1990 Wong would also co-direct Lau in No Risk, No Gain alongside Jimmy Heung (here on producer duty). Wong would direct Lau for the last time in 1994’s The Three Swordsmen, which would also be his last time in the director’s chair.

The plot of Kung Fu Vs. Acrobat feels typical of the late 80’s and early 90’s era of Hong Kong filmmaking, in that many aspects of it feel like they were being made up as they went along, but in a nutshell, it goes something like this. Lau and Nat Chan (Magic Crystal, The Fortune Code) are a pair of bumbling advertising agents who get sent on an assignment to the mainland (or an “undeveloped place” as Lau puts it, oh how times change). Deciding to randomly purchase some fake antiques which turn out to be authentic national treasures from some dodgy locals, they find themselves on the run from the police and end up falling into a hidden cave.

It’s in the cave that they accidentally wake up a princess and her maid, played by Joey Wong (City Hunter, Green Snake) and Cutie Mui Siu-Wai (No Risk, No Gain, Perfect Girls), who’ve been asleep for the past 700 years. Unfortunately they also wake up super evil kung fu expert Yuen Wah (Eastern Condors, Dragons Forever), so they all high tail it back to Hong Kong with Wah in hot pursuit, who’s eager to win the heart of Wong no matter what the cost. Thankfully before leaving the cave Lau and Chan shared half of a magic pill each, which also gives them kung fu super-powers, such as Lau’s laugh acting like a sonic boom and Chan being able to conjure up animated frisbees.

Yuen Wah is one of the legends of kung fu cinema, able to make any movie he stars in more bearable, and here he’s also on action choreography duty. His character in Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic is clearly riffing on a similar one he played just a year prior in The Iceman Cometh, which also saw him as an evil villain from ancient times unthawed in modern day Hong Kong. Unlike in Clarence Fok’s movie though, here Wah’s villain isn’t as ruthless or threatening, and is frequently played for laughs. Believing TV commercials to send him secret messages, his enthusiasm towards Coca Cola ads and alike is genuinely funny, as is when he mistakes Nat Chan’s father (played by Walter Tso – who featured in the original Buddha’s Palm movies from the 60’s) to be his comrade from the past.

While the initial tried and tested fish out of water story shows plenty of comedic promise (watching Cutie Miu’s reactions to flicking through a fashion magazine is a highlight), the concept wears thin surprisingly fast, and quickly begins to feel like a poor mans Jeff Lau flick. The reason becomes apparent when you realise that Wong Jing was behind the script, a director and writer who has always been commercially attuned (by his own admission), but also someone for whom it was never less than obvious when they weren’t really trying. For every amusing homage to A Chinese Ghost Story, there’s a prolonged joke that misses the mark, or a scene which simply feels unnecessary to the plot.

The biggest offender of the latter is the inclusion of an animated turtle, who feels like an afterthought, but has all of its scenes repeated during the end credits as if it’s the highlight of the entire movie. Not only does the character make no sense (and would be better suited in Who Framed Roger Rabbit), it’s also incredibly annoying, adding nothing to the story and certainly not raising any laughs (which I think may have been the point). I don’t know of any other live action Hong Kong movie that’s attempted to incorporate an animated character into its narrative, but if this is the only one then I’m fine with that. If you want to see Yuen Wah get beaten up by a hammer wielding cartoon turtle though, at least you’ve come to the right place.

More than anything Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic feels like it should be an entertaining short film that pays homage to the vintage wuxia fantasies that inspired it, but instead the concept has been stretched to 100 minutes, which ultimately feels longer than anyone on set had material for. One of the biggest issues is ironically its main reason for existing, in that the 60’s aesthetic hasn’t been updated at all, with the animated power blasts and Buddha’s Palms overlayed much like they were a quarter of a century earlier. In terms of special effects and overall spectacle, it’s actually Wong’s remake from 8 years earlier which impresses far more. All of this means you can’t help but wonder if Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic had been made just a couple of years later, when the new wave wuxia craze was well and truly underway, how much more fun the end product may have turned out.

As much as I was hoping to write a review that could find some charm in Kung Fu Vs. Acrobatic being viewed in 2021, in the end it’s fair to say most of those reviews I read 2 decades ago hit the nail on the head. It may not feature any kung fu or acrobatics, but it also doesn’t feature anything that makes it worth recommending.

Paul Bramhall’s Rating: 5/10