Crazy Shaolin Disciples | aka Enter the 36th Chamber of Shaolin (1985) Review

"Crazy Shaolin Disciples" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“Crazy Shaolin Disciples” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: Yau Fung Hung
Cast: Wong Yu, Chin Siu Ho, Gordon Liu Chia Hui, Lo Meng, Lo Lieh, May Cheung Choi Mei, Chun Wong, Philip Kwok Chung Fung, Yuen Qiu, Lee Hoi San
Running Time: 87 min.

By JJ Hatfield

I would prefer to primarily review only good films. However there are times a viewer warning should be advised when movies pretend to be something they are not. This is one of those movies.

Though marketed as yet another great Shaw movie and starring (Gordon) Lui Chia Hui, this is infantile, downright terrible and does not deserve to bear the name of Shaolin!

The plot, such as it is has an evil Manchu officer (Lo Lieh) bringing violence and carnage to a small village. Three rebels Hu Huei Chian (Chin Siu Ho), Hong Si Kuan (Lo Meng) and Fong Sai Yuk (wth?) played by Wong Yu. After the battle is over the three rebels beg for refuge and sanctuary at the Shaolin Temple. Somehow the three manage to become beginning members of Shaolin.

For most of the movie the Northern monks in training and the Southern secular disciples spend a great deal of time playing “jokes” upon each other. They are not funny. Perhaps if you are about 11 years old and find things like shit, snot, piss, etc. funny you might laugh once or twice. The new guys don’t like the mandated rules or the strict practice. These guys aren’t crazy they are brats who needed to spend more time with mommy and daddy or getting beat the crap out of by the Manchu soldiers.

Finally Gordon Liu Chia Hui as Wu Qing, (No not San Te) as a young monk gets into a scuffle or two with the three new guys. Then to add more excitement and humor (oh goody, just what this shit needs) Fong Sai Yuk releases an insane monk(Chun Wong) who causes all sorts of trouble and apparently is designed to add even more frickin’ humor.

Don’t blame this one on Lau Kar Leung! Yau Fung Hung was the director and I cannot even confirm who wrote the story, maybe a guy listed under Planning? I am not searching any more. I wouldn’t want to have my name attached to this dreck!

There is action and fighting that almost sometimes give the viewer hope they are not wasting their time completely. But then they inject some of the absolute worst ever “humor” spit out by the Shaws. Oh and some totally ludicrous wire fu that is not exciting or amusing. To add some interest Lo Lieh is still hanging around as the evil Manchu and of course wants revenge no matter how many people he has to kill!

Nothing is good enough to save this movie. There are over a hundred “Shaw Brothers” films and most of them are much better than this!

Recommendation: Don’t waste time and money on this!

JJ Hatfield’s Rating: 2/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews, Shaw Brothers | Tagged , , , , , , , , |

Blood Trilogy, The: Blood Feast/Two Thousand Maniacs/Color Me Blood Red Blu-ray (Image)

Blood Trilogy, The: Blood Feast/Two Thousand Maniacs/Color Me Blood Red Blu-ray (Image)

Blood Trilogy, The: Blood Feast/Two Thousand Maniacs/Color Me Blood Red Blu-ray (Image)

First time on Blu-ray! Herschell Gordon Lewis’ pioneering “gore” films in deluxe Special Editions. “Blood Feast” (1963, 67 min.) – Mrs. Fremont hires crackpot Egyptian cultist Fuad Ramses to cater a party–and he prepares a Blood Feast made from the grisly body parts of nubile young women. The world’s first gore film! “Two Thousand Maniacs” (1964, 87 min.) – The 2000 Maniacs of a small Southern town celebrate the 100th anniversary of the Civil War by forcing a handful of Northerners to serve as “guests” in their macabre, blood-crazed fun and games. “Color Me Blood Red” (1965, 79 min.) – When his girlfriend, Gigi, cuts her finger on a frame, maniacal artist Adam Sorg discovers a new shade of crimson that will make his artwork so special–human blood!

Trailers: Blood Feast | Two Thousand Maniacs | Color Me Blood Red

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

The Hills Have Eyes Blu-ray (Image)

The Hills Have Eyes Blu-ray (Image)

The Hills Have Eyes Blu-ray (Image)

RELEASE DATE: September 6, 2011

First time on Blu-ray! The Hills Have Eyes, a 1977 cult horror film directed by Wes Craven. It is about a family on a road trip who become stranded in the Nevada desert, and are hunted by a clan of deformed cannibals in the surrounding hills. Check out the trailer.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Dangerous Babes – 12 Movie DVD Collection (Mill Creek)

Dangerous Babes - 12 Movie DVD Collection (Mill Creek)

Dangerous Babes - 12 Movie DVD Collection (Mill Creek)

RELEASE DATE: July 19, 2011

Announcing a dozen more cult favorites and hard-to-find cinematic classics culminated for this truly unique set of flicks from the incomparable Crown International Pictures. These 12 locked and loaded movies will have you convinced never mess with a Dangerous Babe! With an explosive mix of chemistry, intrigue and danger these 12 sizzling action-adventures will have you addicted from the start Extremely rare and hard-to-find films including two movies making their DVD debut.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Dead Heat Blu-ray (Image)

"Dead Heat" Theatrical Poster

"Dead Heat" Theatrical Poster

RELEASE DATE: September 20, 2011

Dead Heat is a 1988 cult movie about an LAPD police officer, Roger Mortis (Treat Williams), killed while attempting to arrest zombies who have been reanimated by the head of Dante Laboratories in order to carry out violent armed robberies. Also starring Joe Piscopo. Check out the trailer here.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Musa | aka Musa the Warrior (2001) Review

"Musa" Korean Theatrical Poster

“Musa” Korean Theatrical Poster

Director: Kim Sung-su
Writer: Kim Sung-su
Cast: Ju Jin-mo, Jung Woo-sung, Ahn Sung-kee, Zhang Ziyi, Park Yong-woo, Park Jeong-hak, Yu Hye-jin, Jeung Seok-yong, Lee Du-il, Han Yeong-mok, Yu Rong Guang
Running Time: 158 min.

By Alexander

Ignoring Public Enemy’s pleas to not believe the hype, I prowled misspelled listings of all-region Musa DVDs on eBay until I found a dealer who wasn’t charging $40+ for a cheaply pressed bootleg solely so I could see firsthand what all the fuss was about. I’ve fallen trap to the Hype Machine before, standing in line for hours to catch an early screening of Phantom Menace (and God, how it sucked) and begging and pleading my parents for an elusive (at the time, anyway) brown-haired Cabbage Patch Kid when those adorable dolls sent Soccer Moms into murderous frenzies at K-Mart. So it was with trepidation that I dropped a cool $15 (what a bargain!) on an “original” Musa DVD.

So I get the DVD after a few weeks (!), eager to see whether or not Musa was indeed even remotely as good as Numskull said it was. I ripped open the padded envelope with gusto and pulled out the plastic boxes and read, aghast, the following: “Musa: Best Vedio Foever! Speiel Featurs!”

Okay, so it wasn’t the real deal and I probably lined the pockets of a two-bit criminal enterprise of poor spellers specializing in basement pressed bootlegs of hit Korean films. Whatever. What mattered most was that the disc worked. Wide screen. Crisp picture. Great sound.

Best $15 I’ve ever spent.

Of the 750 plus films I’ve watched in my lifetime, few have brought me more pleasure than this mesmerizing movie. It’s easily one of the best and most moving films I’ve ever seen, ranking amongst personal favorites Schindler’s List, Braveheart, Last of the Mohicans, Platoon, Three Kings, The Killer and Pulp Fiction. Musa is THAT good.

I knew I was watching one of the best film’s I’ve seen about thirty minutes into Musa. When Ahn Sung-kee’s character, the archer Daejung, heroically dashes full speed down a barren hill towards a legion of enemies with only a bow and a notched arrow, I felt chills snake down my spine. (The last time I was so moved by a scene was during the frenetic opening minutes of Spielberg’s masterpiece Saving Private Ryan). Many similarly moving and majestically filmed scenes follow (including a rousing finale that left me — honest to God– on the verge of tears).

Sure, the whole rag-tag-band-of-highly-skilled-warriors-versus-a-mammoth-army has been done countless times before, but never in such an emotionally charged, beautifully filmed, superbly choreographed and convincingly acted way. Everything WORKS here, from the cast (Zhang Ziyi stands out as Princess Buyoung), to the battle sequences (as HUGE and deftly filmed as anything in the highly touted Gladiator), to the cinematography, to the music, to the engaging plot. Musa is, simply, the best movie ever produced on the Asian continent.

(NOTE: Bootlegs are BAD! Very, very BAD! May copywrite infringers burn in hell ‘foever’!)

Alexander’s Rating: 10/10


By Numskull

An “epic” is typically defined as a long narrative describing heroic deeds and taking place over an extended period of time. This being the case, many films which have been described as “epic” AREN’T epic; they’re merely long. Due to the time constraints imposed by the medium of popular cinema, the meaning of the word can be tinkered with and applied to films which present an ambitious story in grandiose fashion, regardless of just how many or how few heroic deeds (if any) they entail and of the amount of time in which they take place, within the confines of their own little universes. With that definition, “epic” (be it noun or adjective) will be implemented henceforth and can most definitely be used in reference to the lengthy Korean adventure, Musa.

The reason I bring the connotations of the word “epic” into debate is that Musa’s storyline, while encompassing more characters and situations than it would indicate at first, is quite simple. A band of Korean envoys and soldiers from two separate factions…Yongho and Joojin…meets a hostile reception in China and, thanks to the capricious hand of Lady Luck, is thrown into a dire situation requiring them to flee to their homeland of Koryo (what westerners would refer to as Korea). Two warring Chinese forces, the Yuan and the Ming, involve our hapless protagonists in their power struggle even more deeply when Buyoung, the abducted Ming princess, falls into their hands. Strangers in a strange land, the travelers from Koryo must face bloodthirsty foes, the merciless whims of Mother Nature, and a very difficult decision…whether to proceed with their plan to try and escape China or to assist Princess Buyoung in an attempt to find an easier way out of this mess…while struggling with heated disagreements and clashes of personality and philosophy within their own ranks.

Chief among the Korean characters are General Choi Jung (Jun Jin-mo), decision-maker in all matters of conflict and survival; Daejung (Ahn Sung-kee), a highly skilled archer and trusted advisor who served under Choi Jung’s father; and Yeesol (Jung Woo-sung), a long-time servant of the vice-ambassador with which the group travels. Princess Buyoung is deftly played by Zhang Ziyi, who exhibits a good mix of the solemn nobility which should rightfully be intrinsic to her character and the pampered bitchiness that made her so despicable (yet so damned attractive at the same time) in her breakout film, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Noteworthy among the supporting cast are Park Yong-woo as Park Jumyung, a cowardly interpreter; Lee Du-il as Jisan, a Buddhist monk who joins our unfortunate group simply because it’s the right thing to do; and Yu Rong Guang (best known for the title role in 1993’s Iron Monkey) as the Mongol General Rambulhua, a principled but very formidable antagonist.

Surpassing the budget record set by another Korean swordplay epic, Bichunmoo (“Dance with Sword”), the production of Musa was clearly a colossal undertaking. It features dialogue in both Korean and Mandarin (with Zhang Ziyi once again being a native speaker surrounded by actors who were required to study the language for their roles in the film), and its mammoth cast and crew covered 10,000 kilometers of territory (mostly in the inhospitable desert regions of China). Five years of planning, five months of shooting, and a budget of eight million bucks (had this been a Hollywood production, it probably would’ve cost ten times as much and ended up looking about half as good). The combat is shockingly realistic. Fanciness has no place here amid all the screams of agony and severed limbs. The cameras seem to have a special fondness for shots of arrows piercing peoples’ necks. Yet all of this is done with class; this film is not merely concerned with seeing how much bloodshed it can get away with. At the same time, the battle sequences can pack an emotional wallop. I can recall few cinematic moments more rousing than the scene in which Jisan, after two hours (our time) of vow-induced pacifism, explodes into action and starts smashing everyone in sight with a huge wooden support beam to defend a group of helpless peasants.

As time grows short, tempers run high, and the final showdown draws near, the popular Hong Kong theme of redemption rears its head in connection with three characters in particular: Choi Jung, Buyoung, and Park Jumyung. At first, it seemed to me that Choi Jung was something of a flawed character; not “flawed” in the tragic/Shakespearean sense, but “flawed” as in, somebody screwed up when they wrote this guy. His impulsiveness and disregard for the welfare of his troops is so pronounced that one seriously wonders how he ever achieved the rank of General in the first place. However, these issues are addressed in due time, and he eventually comes to be seen in a different light. Princess Buyoung fits into preconceived “princess” stereotype slots quite comfortably at first, and just when you start to think she’s the most useless character in the history of motion pictures and that the Koryo troops should have dumped her royal ass in the middle of nowhere the very moment they met her, she goes and does something incredibly noble (or at least tries to). As for Jumyung, well, what can I say…once a wuss, always a wuss.

The most outstanding character of all, though, is Yeesol (sometimes called Yesol, sometimes called Yeosol…damn subtitles). I friggin’ WORSHIP this guy. He reminds me of Mani (Mark Dacascos) from Brotherhood of the Wolf. Despite living on the lowest rung of the social ladder, he takes shit from no one, I repeat, NO ONE. Look at him cross-eyed and he’ll cut your fucking head off. Although this is a very prestigious sort of film, actor Jung Woo-sung brings an undeniably welcome and even more undeniably cool no-nonsense action hero/lone gunman “badass-ness” to the role, and he manages to do it without letting you forget about the humble position of his character in the grand scheme of things. Though a slave at first, his actions reveal that he is perhaps the most noble character of all.

As of this writing, Musa’s only DVD incarnation is a Region 3 double disc set that includes an 80-page hardcover book featuring a production diary, cast information, and a “DVD Column”…all in Korean. There are also lots of color photos and a small number of technical drawings. The second disc is loaded with not one, not two, but THREE hours of extra features; alas, the production notes and interviews (TONS of those) lack English subtitles, so the only bonus materials of any appreciable value to most Western viewers are the costume design illustrations (from the Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon folks, by the way) and a four-minute outtake segment. However, if you’re able to play Region 3 DVDs, it’s still worth the price of admission. I’m tempted to say that anyone with a passion for epic films, swordplay, and/or a combination of both should invest in an all-region DVD player for the SOLE PURPOSE of watching this film, but…let’s not go nuts. If Miramax acquires the rights to it, THEN let’s go nuts. This film can and most likely WILL leave a mark on Western audiences, whether it is presented whole and untainted or not. It’s just too good NOT to. Its only flaws are occasional herky-jerky moments in the battle scenes (due, if I am not mistaken, not to undercranking but to the insertion of CGI effects), some questionable stunts involving horses (I’m sure the animal rights groups would raise their eyebrows, and rightly so), a final scene that is a bit too rushed and upbeat, and the fact that there are one too many shots of Zhang Ziyi shedding a single tear. That’s understandable, though; the film is so damn good, passionate fans of epic cinema might just weep at its sheer magnificence.

Jam-packed with memorable scenes and performances, Musa represents an overall level of quality on all fronts…dramatic and kinetic, aural and visual…that few contemporary films can hope to match. If you are at all interested in epic movies…old or new, Asian or otherwise…Braveheart, Spartacus, Bichunmoo, you name it…then Musa carries one of the highest recommendations possible.

Numskull’s Rating: 9/10

Posted in Korean, Reviews | Tagged , , , |

Touch of Zen, A (1971) Review

"A Touch of Zen" Chinese Theatrical Poster

“A Touch of Zen” Chinese Theatrical Poster

Director: King Hu
Writer: King Hu
Cast: Hsu Feng, Shih Chun, Pai Ying, Tin Peng, Roy Chiao Hung, Sit Hon, Cho Kin, Go Ming, Miu Tin, Melvin Cheung Wan Man, Liu Chu, Cheung Bing Yuk
Running Time: 180 min.

By JJ Hatfield

A Touch of Zen (Xia nu) is an amazing film. Generally overlooked as just another “chop socky” movie most of the western world has never seen this piece of perfection and that’s a shame. Hopefully after reading this review you will be motivated to watch this film of great importance to the world of cinema.

Do not expect a wild kung fu spree, training, revenge, the usual plot, for this film is very unusual. Though there is most impressive fighting the story builds quite awhile before the first blow is struck. There is no denying this is a very complex plot with layers upon layers and sometimes you see a character who is really who they seem to be. Or are they?

The film is really three different possibilities or realities based upon the same characters. However how those characters interact and inter – relate changes. This film was made before those involved were looking at how foreign box offices would respond. This is a Chinese film.

I’m not going to delve into the character development or even the story. Watch the film and you will understand.

King Hu directed and co wrote (Songling Pu is credited with the story) this fantastic film. Xia nu, the film’s original title is a masterpiece in every way! This film is definitely required for anyone who enjoys foreign, period piece experiences. I take that back. Everyone who has enjoyed movies of any kind should see this fabulous film! It takes time to develop but it is never boring. For a film with a run time of over three hours it is intensely mesmerizing. There are damn few movies that can hold the viewers attention and entertain at the same time. Xia nu does not fail.

Everything has been carefully staged to put you into the film. The cinematography is gorgeous with nature scenes that seem possible only in a different world. So much care has been paid to details the story is very much relevant symbolically and in a whispered way it could he considered to compare with human life, with life itself.

The beautiful backdrops of some of the most gorgeous spots in the country are breathtaking! The use of light and shadow is far beyond what most movies accomplish today! Sunshine is fairly easy to film and often gorgeous but there are other visuals that will pleasingly startle and surprise.

I have a great deal of respect for King Hu and everyone associated with this film!

One reason the film is never boring is because it has many different emotions in focus. There are light hearted times with easy smiles, amusing little scenes, moments of stillness that defies written description. The characters are very real, in every context with human issues and feelings both with love and loyalty, treason and hate.

But what of the martials arts? Ahhh, do not worry. The “action” builds slowly at first, then more and more martial artists are involved until you are watching one of the finest martial arts films made. I do not exagerate. The fighters sometimes do look more like “artists” but that doesn’t hinder their ability to satisfy any martial arts fan. The sheer number increasingly involved is genius! It gives you the time to actually enjoy this feast! The action is real, no super slo-mo, or long blurry generic battle scenes. They didn’t need to add crappy effects because the movie itself is made the way it was meant to be. The fights were filmed exactly as they needed to be allowing the viewer to see some of the “art” in the martial arts. This is not swingy armed fake crap. It is all exciting and many times turns deadly.

For those who wish to take the time to explore this film there is a very spiritual angle involved. Not only does this film present phenomenal story, development and excellent action it also leaves the viewer with something to think about.

Whatever your motivation find this film and buy it if you can because you will be watching this magnificent film time and time again!

* This review is from two old VHS tapes with a running time clocked at 3 hours. All of the tapes were used. There is a newer remaster? but I don’t know how the films compare time wise.

* If you are hunting down Jack Chan or Sammo Hung you won’t see them. They are both credited as stuntmen, but were only in their late teens when this was shot.

This is a fabulous fantastic film you don’t want to miss!

JJ Hatfield’s Rating: 9.5/10

Posted in Chinese, Reviews | Tagged , , , , |

Witchmaker: Legend of Witch Hollow DVD (Navarre)

Witchmaker: Legend of Witch Hollow DVD (Navarre)

Witchmaker: Legend of Witch Hollow DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: July 5, 2011

Witchcraft is a 1969 film directed by the almighty master, William Brown. A psychic researcher and his assistants investigate a series of murders of beautiful young women. Check out the trailer.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

God’s Bloody Acre/Tomcats DVD (Navarre)

God's Bloody Acre/Tomcats DVD (Navarre)

God's Bloody Acre/Tomcats DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: July 12, 2011

When a group of developers threaten the land of three rural brothers, the boys resort to murder to defend their property. However, when the trio starts preying on innocent tourists, things quickly get out of hand. A 70’s Hicksploitation classic! Also includes Tomcats!

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Cut-Throats Nine/Joshua aka Joshua the Black Rider DVD (Navarre)

Cut-Throats Nine/Joshua aka Joshua the Black Rider DVD (Navarre)

Cut-Throats Nine/Joshua aka Joshua the Black Rider DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: August 16, 2011

Cut-Throats Nine: A film acclaimed by critics is the most violent motion picture ever portrayed on the screen. Watch the trailer, if you dare. Also contains Joshua, the story of a black soldier (Fred Williamson) who returns from fighting for the Union in the Civil War only to find out that his mother has been murdered by a gang of white thugs.

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Julie Darling DVD (Navarre)

Julie Darling DVD (Navarre)

Julie Darling DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: August 2, 2011

If you don’t want to see this movie based on the advertisment alone, then maybe you should check out these two clips: clip 1 | clip 2… come on, you know you’re intrigued!

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Nightmare: 30th Anniversary Edition aka Nightmares in a Damaged Brain DVD (Navarre)

Nightmare: 30th Anniversary Edition aka Nightmares in a Damaged Brain DVD (Navarre)

Nightmare: 30th Anniversary Edition aka Nightmares in a Damaged Brain DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: July 26, 2011

Directed by Italian filmmaker Romano Scavolini, Nightmare (1981) is a gruesome horror film that was banned in the UK. The trailer was too gruesome to post! (actually, the truth is, I couldn’t find it).

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Stoney/Killer Likes Candy DVD (Navarre)

Stoney/Killer Likes Candy DVD (Navarre)

Stoney/Killer Likes Candy DVD (Navarre)

RELEASE DATE: August 16, 2011

No trailers for these two exploitation flicks, but check out this Killer Likes Candy clip (reminds me of a scene from “The Big Boss”); also check out this Barbara Bouchet Tribute (star of “Stoney”).

Posted in DVD/Blu-ray New Releases, Other Notable Titles |

Poetry Blu-ray/DVD (Kino)

Poetry Blu-ray/DVD (Kino)

Poetry Blu-ray/DVD (Kino)

RELEASE DATE: August 23, 2011

From Lee Chang-dong (Oasis, Green Fish) comes Poetry. Michael Philips, Chicago Tribune, calls it “One of the heartening glories of the film going year.” It has also won Best Screenplay at the Cannes International Film Festival. Check out the trailer here.

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases |

Breath DVD (Palisades Tartan)

Breath DVD (Palisades Tartan)

Breath DVD (Palisades Tartan)

RELEASE DATE: August 16, 2011

Kim Ki-Duk’s (Address Unknown) 10th film, starring Chang Chen, Zia and Ha Jung-woo is a love story involving a convicted prisoner who “slowly falls for a woman who decorates his prison cell”. Check out the trailer here.

Posted in Asian Titles, DVD/Blu-ray New Releases |